Perfect for us masochistic fools who just wants to experience pain 'cause thus is living *sigh*

To satisfy my rotten heart....
Including those books which doesn't have smut tag but contain NSFW scenes..

some novels will contain r*pe, bd*m, non-con, or anything that may appear uncomfortable. you have been warned.... more>>

in no particular order <<less

List 1 - in no particular order - want to read/reading/have read

Tragedies. Stories when you need something sad or want something to make you cry. All completed stories.... more>>

*sorted by rating <<less

BL/yaoi novels with seme Protagonist. MC tops in a relationship and ML bottoms in the relationship. It could be any category QT, INTERSTELLAR, MODERN, FANTASY,... more>> SHOUNEN-AI KR SMUT.  <<less

Tried to find some top rated BL to read after LMW, but novels were all over the place, so here goes my attempt at collating them into one list.... more>>

Lowest rating will be 4.4 at that time of collation. Won't be ranked from highest to lowest. I will add novels as I find them.

Origin: No comment - haven't read it yet.    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ - read it.     ✔️ - liked.    ✔️✔️ - super liked.   ✔️✔️✔️ - in love.

Part 2 - https://www.novelupdates.com/viewlist/18634/ <<less

《 BL》Looking for a list on ml's pursuing the mc?... more>>

Based on all types of ML's that I am just quite fond of :)

Randomly ordered  <<less

Chinese Novels, sci-fi, gender bender, BL, BG

A list of historical BL stories (Xuanhuan, Xianxia, Wuxia, Cultivation, Fantasy, Reincarnation, Transmigration, Imperialism, Martial Arts, Ancient China, Supernatural) 

My Favorite Chinese Historical  Novels >.< This list consists of both BL and Straight novels with a rating above 4.0~... more>>

Note: Recently, some of the translation teams have taken their works down (dead links on the content section)  from NU (because NU has grown a lot) however most of them if not all have their own sites and the novels are still available there! So if you search the novels online you can still find them! ;)

P.S. There is also a part 2 with more novels and hidden gems for everyone to read! If interested the second list can be found on my account :)  <<less

Novels with royalty tag..... more>>

Does not include QTs

Ancient settings, interstellar, omegaverse etc etc.... <<less

Novels worth reading with smuts.

No description.

[Some of these I have not completed (or are ongoing) so the list is subject to CHANGE at ANY TIME]... more>>

Notes contain mini introductions of the MC (with information from the first few chapters) and what I like about them. I also add novels that have potential to be great reads with promising MCs. But if they repeatedly annoy me, they are off the list.

(Despite the continued list, I am still updating this rec list (as some are still ongoing, and some I have yet to add notes for). <<less

haven't read this all BUT this is basically my ongoing list so this is also for me as well HAHA ヾ(*'▽'*) these are very well-recommended... more>> to me so I wanna share these to you guys!!! (⌒ω⌒)ﾉ ps: i'm not really sure if this is ACTUALLY underrated but i just haven't seen that much people talk about this so here you go!!! | 4.5 stars and above and in NO particular order <<less

BL with a tragedy tag (ಥ﹏ಥ)

A lot of good dog blood is buried below the ratings bcos it's an unfortunate fact that a lot of NU users only rate novels according to fluff amount w/c made it harder for drama fans to look for good angst.  Common tropes: #wife/husband-chasing crematorium#angst #drama #torture #regret #character development #grovelling #(some)redemption  #(some)tragedy and other triggering issues. ... more>>

#REAL Crematorium. Just search around for full explanation but impt. point is: THEY ENDED UP WITH ANOTHER PERSON. For those who had a sadistic liking seeing a scum ML grovelling but still fail to take MC back, THIS IS FOR YOU.

 Warning: Most stories here are only for the strong-hearted. However, those I regard as "bad (or messily-written) dog blood" that I really cannot tolerate will not be included here  

I will indicate if it's bad ending. If it doesn't have the #BE tag, it's automatically a happy ending.
If you wanted to cleanse your tear duct every now and then, check the ones tagged with #tearjerker. You're welcome.

PM me for raw/MTL links <<less

A list of best xianxia, wuxia, xuanhuan and historical novels in my opinion. ... more>>

Power couples, angst, lots of pining and slow-burn. <<less

No description.

Ancient or Cultivation BL reads that will make you feel you didn't waste your time. This list is apart of a series classified by genre; other lists of this series include Thriller/Action, Fluff, and Modern/Transmigration novels. I tried to include both known and unknown novels to give more diversity to the reading list. Honest note--not a big fan of ancient settings. I've judged quality by reviews and seeming plot. ... more>>

So what is my subjective version of a quality BL of this list?

-No/little plot holes & well developed plot

Capable MC and ML  (not aggravatingly s*upid and knows when to respect each other but also put their foot down at the right moments). 

 -Lasting impression. I made this list by memory so if it's not on here...Chances are it's not worth remembering for the list.

-Makes me think--especially applies to this genre since I usually read this genre for the court schemes and palace intrigues. 

-Make me cry, laugh, yell or gasp. Perhaps all at the same  time. 

*****I have also included BL novels that have high expectations from me. The higher the expectations, the higher the stars. Hence, "***, **, *."

PS. Novels I've read are the only ones rated according to number. The rest (unread) are just listed randomly.

 PSS. There are always exceptions on this list that don't fit the requirements. But it's not bad to explore out of your comfort zone.  <<less

There are tragedy, abuse, or death of the loves one in some stories bellow that make you sad and your heart hurt, but that is... more>> the part of the story and make the story complete. <<less

Boys love angst~~... more>>

*TW* Some/most of these stories will contain ABUSE, INVOLUNTARY CONFINEMENT, r*pe, and other graphic descriptions of violence. Some of these are seriously tragedic and may cause tears or elongated periods of agony .

I was probably sobbing over this at 2am at one point, , and I will update summaries as I go.

Please let me know if you have any novel recommendations you think fit this list! Happy reading ^^ <<less

Angsty and sad webnovels because I'm a sucker for angsty stories. Yes, I really really love abusing myself so join me in this self-abuse-by-angst cult... more>>

(ErHa, look what you made me do. You made me a masochist (⁠༎ຶ⁠ ⁠෴⁠ ⁠༎ຶ⁠) )

Most of these webnovels are completed. They may have BE/HE. I have Maladaptive Daydreaming Disorder, so while some of these novels may not be pure angst but they have fair share of heart-clenching moments that leave lots of room for more sad imaginations. <<less

Second Part