BL: Top Picks- Tear Inducers/Dog-Blood/Angst

CN (4.4)

65 Chapters Every 47.7 Day(s) 15769 Readers 384 Reviews 04-27-2023

Action Adventure Drama Mature Romance Smut Tragedy Xianxia Yaoi

Rating: 5/5- I think I may need some therapy after reading this book. As of now, this book has topped my “best books ever read in my current lifetime” list.... more>>

I don’t think I’ve cried this much reading a tragedy novel as much as I cried during ErHa. Even though I don’t shy away from angsty tragedy novels- this was really excruciating. Like thinking of certain parts in the story still makes my stomach drop and heart race, like that’s how this book will affect you.

I binge read this book and all I can say is that it’s one excruciatingly painful and adrenaline pumping journey. I was so emotionally invested and affected from start to finish and it’s been such a long time for me to so deeply immerse myself in a character’s world since TGCF (HOB).

You know, firstly the author, Meatbun, is truly talented but wow! Can they inflict pain, damn. The dedication to every character created was so splendid and so beautifully written. No character behaved at the reader’s will and this story never once goes how you expect it to go. That thrill and edge is always there. The sting of heartbreak, pain, sacrifice and flawed humanity is so patiently and thoroughly told. You get s**ked into this carefully weaved story that paints a vivid but numbingly painful experience. Each character’s story was so profoundly told with the right amount of detail, that you could create a connection with them, good or bad. I really felt joy and sorrow, genuinely, as I went through this book.

I think it will be hard to find a book like this, that hits you so deeply, in the future. It’s not an easy read and I felt truly exhausted, physically (coz I read into the wee hours of the morning) and emotionally, after reaching the end. It was a very bittersweet moment for me to finally put down the book and rest my eyes and also say goodbye to the world that I grew so immersed in and the characters I fell in love with.

The best love stories are the most painful love stories and the best love is the most flawed love. This book really showed me that and I felt like my romantic and masochistic heart had finally been beaten to death and resurrected. A beautifully bittersweet feeling.

In a way, this book really brings out your inner masochist if you can make it to the end- even if it’s with swollen eyes, a snotty nose and probably lying in a coffin awaiting your emotional destruction. It’s a masterpiece, a once in a lifetime kinda read, unforgettable and brilliant, beautiful and sorrowful. I probably won’t forget this book for years to come. Here’s hoping that the series coming out in 2021 does it justice. <<less

CN (4.5)

#2Yu Wu

34 Chapters Every 105.2 Day(s) 8621 Readers 87 Reviews 06-01-2020

Action Adult Drama Fantasy Romance Smut Xianxia Yaoi

Rating: 5/5- Knives! Knives! And more Knives! Wow!... more>>

CN (4.5)

#3Nan Chan

0 Chapters Every 88.6 Day(s) 8449 Readers 95 Reviews 11-01-2020

Adventure Psychological Romance Supernatural Tragedy Xianxia Yaoi

Rating: 5/5- I loved this! Thrilling, dark and wonderful! CP of the year 2021, thus far, goes to Emperor Cang and Jing Lin! I don’t care what anyone else says!... more>>

The CP in this story is one of the many reasons to read this novel. They are officially in my favorite CP list! I wish there were more extras with them but their chemistry and interactions throughout the book was so lovely and heartwarming but also emotionally devastating and heartbreaking!

Plus that little stone figure is adorable!

I always thought that HOB would top my list of Xuanhuan novels but I must say that Nan Chan can compete at the same level and may in some aspects give HOB a run for its money. The main characters are wonderful and colourful in their own right. They live up to the flawed and in likeable as well as the wondrous and likeable. All the characters in the book are not boringly oppressive and have many weaknesses as much as strengths. It’s the various flaws, fears and weaknesses that really sets the tone for the book and pushes the stories development.

Reading this was a similar emotional experience to reading ErHa, for me (although not as tragically intense). It is a heartbreaking novel but it also has a wonderfully redeeming end. I loved that the characters were not perfect and that the story was so intriguing, forcing you to want to turn the page but also making you feel as if you didn’t want the end to come.

My only qualm was a single dubcon scene between the main CP, although it does contribute a lot to the story I couldn’t help but wonder if it could have been avoided or handled differently. It’s not really a mood killer per say but Cang Ji is actually such a puppy and in a way the dubcon felt a little out of character for him. He’s intrusive and a little pushy but his character was never really the dubcon type. Anyway- that’s just my personal take on that and I didn’t hate it because, like I said- it was crucial to the story and had its reasonings in that context and there was guilt felt.

One of the biggest highlights for me was the plot. This plot was so excellent that I will remember it for a long time! It really keeps you on edge and the way the story ties up, even with all the painfully told stories of the side characters and the vicious greed and selfishness, the cruelty and greed of the world really is well told by the author. I definitely look forward to reading more work from this author.

Lastly, the ending was spectacular! I didn’t see the ending coming all the way until the last few chapters reveal. Kudos to the author for that! Managing to add the element of surprise and keep it going until that late into a novel is very difficult because it’s often that you guess the correct villains, white lotuses, bosses etc quite early on. With this novel pretty much all my guesses were wrong which was such a great feeling.

Overall, I absolutely adore the CP and the plot as well as this author! This is my new favorite in this genre and I highly recommend reading this as long as you can stomach the trauma and psych damaging story (at certain parts) and handle a bit of tragedy.

Also, just read it for the cutie pie baby stone figure and our wonderful main CP! <<less

CN (4.8)

#4Little Mushroom

0 Chapters Every 1551 Day(s) 12125 Readers 299 Reviews 01-28-2020

Completed Drama Romance Sci-fi Shounen Ai

Rating: 5/5- No words will ever describe how beautiful this novel is. It is my novel of the year, 2020.... more>>

CN (4.3)

#5Brother

54 Chapters Every 178.7 Day(s) 4034 Readers 58 Reviews 03-02-2017

Completed Drama Mature Psychological Romance Slice of Life Yaoi

Rating: 5/5- This novel was so well written, that I’ve read it numerous times already. An all-time favourite.... more>>

Firstly, I am an incredibly open minded reader, who reads more out of curiosity at first than absolute preference. This novel is in*est between blood brothers and where the younger brother is mentally disabled.

The plot is driven by forbidden and unacceptable love but the turmoil that the MC goes through is so well written. I think love is a dynamic that does not make sense to everyone, and what is acceptable to one may not necessarily be accepted by others.

In my opinion, the ret*rdation or autism of the younger brother is not portrayed as severely as some real life cases, causing one to see his character overly romanticised and probably unrealistic. This is fiction however so I cannot fault the author much here.

In a way it almost feels like the younger brother simply viewed his older brother as his entire universe from a young age and being together was a natural result, as he could not find solace or comfort with anyone else. The older brother was driven by guilt and then a twisted mutation of such feelings, to become attached and focused on his younger brother. I think having such a neglectful parent also allowed for such feelings to take on a life of itself and grow into that romantic kind of love.

The author really succeeding in turning a taboo type of love into something very pure from start to finish, especially because that guilt and pain of the MC is never forgotten. It’s easy to also see how the MCs desperation drove him to do what he did at the end at the expense of taking advantage of his brother, however if I look at what their circumstances were since childhood, I don’t think the younger brother would have ever coped without his brother. Irrespective of how in*est is depicted, the reality of this novel shows how love develops and warps into the very necessity of someone’s life as well as the bane of their existence.

I think one can interpret this novel in many ways, even I personally have many views that are both negative and positive- however the one opinion of mine that stands out is that love is terrifying but honest.

As a reader I am always open minded to various concepts that can be written about in fiction, and my curiosity has always been the foundation of my ever expanding worldliness. I think morally, this topic will be heavily debated and will result in many correct and incorrect points.

However to me, I think this novel will truly remain special because it’s this type of book that really allows one to embrace the fearful nature of the world and its emotions, wonders and horrors we live amongst <<less

CN (4.4)

#6Living to Suffer

20 Chapters Every 167.2 Day(s) 4196 Readers 44 Reviews 09-20-2017

Completed Drama Historical Martial Arts Mature Romance Smut Tragedy Yaoi

Rating: 4.5/5- I cried is all I’m going to say.... more>>

CN (4.6)

#7Till Death Do Us Part

27 Chapters Every 199.7 Day(s) 3963 Readers 73 Reviews 06-30-2016

Completed Drama Fantasy Historical Mature Romance Smut Yaoi

Rating: 4.5/5- I definitely cried again but it’s always good to clean out your tear ducts.... more>>

CN (4.3)

#8Gaze at the Scenes of Debauchery

16 Chapters Every 140.7 Day(s) 2997 Readers 97 Reviews 11-27-2018

Completed Drama Mature Tragedy Yaoi

Rating: 4/5- Very well written, moving and painful. The ending was certainly the best in my opinion.... more>>

This is certainly tragic and painful, however what made this story really affect me was how realistic and raw it is. People are that selfish and people really are that cruel. I feel the choices the MC made really were what he thought was best for him and having encountered people like the ML in real life and seeing how destructive their actions are to the people who love them, I understood the MC mostly.

Perhaps in heteros*xual relationships, some partners are left with children and find that it’s easier or necessary to stay or hold on (this is solely my opinion). They also have something “left” even if the other person leaves them, or vice versa. This story hurts because the MC really had nothing left except all his own sacrifices and the constant pain of loving someone too deeply and watching them treat your love like tr*sh. I cannot fault the MC for his pain or decisions. I also felt that the ML truly enjoyed the helplessness and dependency he caused the MC to feel, and that really triggered me because I know of people who behave this way in reality.

Just because a person loves you, does not mean you have won, does not make you the best and certainly does not mean you own them and all that they have. Love does not mean free reign and objectification of another.

The MC was also right in not rebounding, although I also understood how his wanting to get a sense of revenge made him hurt the SLS, he stopped when he saw he was going too far. I think no one is left untouched when made to feel abuse and neglect for years and unconsciously or consciously, they too, dole it out. We are only human after all.

I think as a whole, infidelity is taken too lightly in society and it has been for years, but for many of us who still believe in the purity and weight of love, it has a massive impact on our lives. Sometimes one only has a single opportunity to give love a chance and when that chance is betrayed, perhaps the existence of love for them is destroyed too.

This book really puts all of those feelings into words. It’s not a kind book and no one is likeable. However, real humans are not likeable either, we simply learn to love and that love makes unlikeable things acceptable. Eventually when we can no longer accept such, we can choose to move on or inflict our own evil emotions on others. Sometimes moving on may not be possible but freedom always is, one way or another.

This ending is neither happy nor sad, it’s inevitable (like Thanos said...) <<less

CN (3.8)

#9Welcome Home

0 Chapters Every 1032 Day(s) 244 Readers 3 Reviews N/A

Drama Tragedy Yaoi

Rating: 4/5- Wow… this was a difficult read.... more>>

JP (4.5)

#10Hako no Naka

21 Chapters Every 257 Day(s) 2144 Readers 36 Reviews 09-29-2013

Completed Drama Mature Psychological Slice of Life Tragedy Yaoi

Rating: 4/5: I will never read this book again, it made me feel too many horrible emotions.... more>>

SPOILER ALERT!

It was torturous, painful and heartbreaking. I cried so much for the ML and I could never come to terms with how things ended for him. I never once felt like the MC was remotely likeable. In fact, if all that drama in his life never happened, he would have continued to step all over the ML’s heart. The fact that he still thought it fine to invite the person who loved him, into his married with kids, home and insist on the ML being happy with that, was so nauseatingly selfish and ridiculous of him, I seriously considered dropping this novel at that point.

Human beings should have some sort of respectable awareness, especially to not be tr*sh. This MC was clearly the highest grade of tr*sh. Especially because up until now I still don’t understand how he simply skipped over the grieving period so quickly and had an awfully unnatural lukewarm reaction to the colossal events that affected the trajectory of the ML and his relationship. I found this so unpleasant as this was pretty much a life changing even and it really asked for more depth and feeling.

The ML really went through hell only to end up with someone so undeserving and cowardly. It made me so mad, but I applaud the author for creating such a novel with such strong emotive abilities because this entire journey was so nauseatingly unpleasant for me, I spent an hour crying and tossing and turning, after reading it. Simply because the author caused me to be so utterly distraught at such a horrible character, I commend such skill.

I am glad the ML got to be with the person he loved, but the person he loved never deserved him from the start and even until the end, I felt like his love was incomparable and minuscule when compared to the purity and magnanimity of the MLs. I wished he’d never met that horrible MC because he truly deserved so much more. His heart was so dedicated and pure and life and the MC just took from him.

I’m happy that the ending showed how the ML died first and I hope in the years that the MC continued to live, that he slowly deteriorated from sorrow and the pain of heartbreak and regret, at least it could count as minimum retribution for the 7 years of hell the ML went through because of him.

I really couldn’t even care for the MC. Uggghhhh thinking of him just upsets my soul!I’m starting to hate tragedy tag novels and I chalk up this whole novel as an experience I would much rather forget. <<less

CN (4.5)

#11The Heart of a Smith

60 Chapters Every 112.5 Day(s) 5230 Readers 64 Reviews 11-25-2019

Completed Drama Romance Smut Yaoi

Rating: 5/5- Poignant, realistic, heartwarming and heartbreaking! Such a memorable and wonderfully told story!... more>>

CN (4.6)

#12A Certain Someone

2 Chapters Every 198 Day(s) 5800 Readers 119 Reviews 12-15-2023

Completed Comedy Drama Romance School Life Shounen Ai Slice of Life Yaoi

Rating: 4.5/5- This was a fantastic read! Memorable, poignant, heartbreaking and real.... more>>

CN (3.8)

#13Childish Flower

37 Chapters Every 1.6 Day(s) 3742 Readers 63 Reviews 01-22-2022

Completed Drama Psychological Romance Smut Yaoi

Rating: 4/5- I have cried when reading novels, but I really bawled when I read this. (I could have been PMSing at the time as well)... more>>

CN (4.2)

#14Picked up by the Protagonist of a Tormented! MC Novel

94 Chapters Every 107.6 Day(s) 9964 Readers 132 Reviews 04-27-2021

Completed Action Fantasy Martial Arts Romance Yaoi

Rating: 4/5- Absolutely brilliant, although heartbreaking and sad at the same time.... more>>

CN (4.1)

#15Professional Body Double

159 Chapters Every 113.7 Day(s) 4992 Readers 108 Reviews 09-08-2019

Completed Adult Drama Mature Romance Smut Supernatural Tragedy Yaoi

Rating: 4/5- Angsty, messed up but a huge page turner. I was captivated.... more>>

I put this book off for quite some time as it was marked as a heavily angsty read. In my opinion, it wasn’t as terrible as some angst ridden novels I’ve read prior. I didn’t shed any tears for the characters. I think they were both complex and silly in their own ways and all the consequences they faced were because of their own decisions. These are two characters who are just destined for misery and they are both all too willing to accept that fact.

The author portrayed this quite well without it feeling exhaustive. I did feel bad for the MC to repeat the same mistakes from his previous life, but I also think that sometimes rebirth isn’t all it’s made out to be. In the MCs case we get to see how no matter how much he wishes things could be different, his choices still led him to repeat history which proves that perhaps you can’t escape your fate.

Overall the relationship was unhealthy from the start and in all honesty I don’t think the realism stuck to the end, which was the only disappointment for me, having such a strong premise with complex and frustrating characters- the ending fell flat with a very forced fluff type relationship. Maybe I’ll just being fussy but it felt really off tone after reading such struggles for over 100 chapters.

The ML has serious psychological issues that will affect their relationship not just from their first interaction but all the built up emotion from the 3 years of grief. The MC has serious self-esteem issues and trust issues that will always show itself in their relationship. I think the author set herself up with fantastic characters but even she was out of her league when it came to closing off their characters.

I really liked the MLs brother, definitely a favorite character of mine. All the other characters were suitable and well rounded. I’d have liked to see more punishment for the brother in law but I guess he got his ending.

Overall not as angsty as some have made it out to be. I feel like the characters are complex and realistic and the story played out as most likely as it could with their past interactions.

Very captivating overall so worth the read if you’re into relationship centred plots with heavy emphasis on emotional turmoil and bad choices. <<less

CN (3.9)

#16Engraved in Bone

82 Chapters Every 2.3 Day(s) 1795 Readers 11 Reviews 08-15-2020

Completed Drama Gender Bender Horror Romance Supernatural Tragedy Xuanhuan Yaoi

Rating: 4/5- It’s a tragedy and there’s a good overarching plot that ties all the suffering together. But it was a bit of an overkill for me by the end. If it was the author’s intention to convey a concept of never ending cycle of torment- then kudos!... more>>

The first arc was the best and I also enjoyed the 5th arc as well. The rest are good but towards the ending of the book you feel like you’re in a karmic cycle of endless punishment and the novel ends on that note as well.

In a way, the story flows relatively well (although I felt highly confused at certain points and needed to read the translators comments to clear up some of my confusion). I’m all for tragedy but I think my personal preference would have been for the cycle to stop at some point instead of carry on in this painful monotony. It didn’t have to be a happy ending but it should have been an ending nonetheless.

I think all the characters had some crazy obsession issues and to be very honest, and I think it’s actually mentioned in the novel, this is not love between these characters, it’s pure obsession that is triggered and carried on over lifetimes where no one wins in the end. It’s clear that the so called “love” born in the relationships don’t seem like love but more like self-deprecating attachment and obsession that considers neither circumstance or reason.

The characters are pitiful and you don’t know whether to feel sad for them, commiserate with them or shake your head at their poor reasoning and actions. No one learns from their predecessor only to go through the exact cycle of suffering whilst projecting and acting out the exact same way their predecessors did.

In the second last chapter there’s an indication that someone finally understands but there’s no real character growth or realisation in the novel. No one has the intention to change, it’s just pure greed, selfishness, jealousy and obsession. All the negative feelings induced when wanting something but not getting it is magnified and acted upon. It’s like a realistic portrayal of how horrible people are when greed and obsession take over them.

The author did one thing brilliantly though. Conveying the 8 sufferings was truly magnificent. Even if the storytelling fell short here and there for the overarching plot, each individual arc representing the sufferings was very well built and told.

It’s a good story with some slightly lacking execution here and there but nonetheless a unique concept. If you’re wanting to feel desolate for a while to find solace in others misery then I suggest reading this. <<less

CN (4.1)

#17Rebirth of a Cannon Fodder from a Novel

130 Chapters Every 76.3 Day(s) 7642 Readers 208 Reviews 06-22-2021

Completed Drama Romance School Life Shounen Ai

Rating: 4/5- I was close to having an aneurism with every passing chapter but I ended up making it through to the end. ... more>>

CN (4.5)

#18Hope You’ve Been Well

110 Chapters Every 18 Day(s) 3844 Readers 51 Reviews 08-02-2023

Completed Drama Romance School Life Slice of Life Yaoi

Rating: 4/5- Really great story, lovely romance and decent pacing. Overall the characters are relatively consistent and there is substance to their personalities and behaviours. There’s... more>>