Turns Out I’m Crazy

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Lu Zhengfei personally killed Chen Qianqing with his abuse.

He cut off Chen Qianqing’s legs, and blinded his eyes, locking him up with chains in his house. Then, he watched with his eyes wide as he died. Injuries inflicted in the name of love would always end in a tragedy.

Did Lu Zhengfei regret it? Of course he did. And so, God gave him a chance to be reborn.

But this time, he found that he himself——became Chen Qianqing.

Associated Names
One entry per line
我原来是个神经病
Related Series
N/A
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Recommendation Lists
  1. BL: Rebirth
  2. Best BL
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  4. Pensive BL
  5. Favorites!

Latest Release

Date Group Release
06/11/19 Helli Translations c30
06/08/19 Helli Translations c29
06/04/19 Helli Translations c28
06/01/19 Helli Translations c27
05/29/19 Helli Translations c26
05/26/19 Helli Translations c25
05/23/19 Helli Translations c24
05/20/19 Helli Translations c23
05/17/19 Helli Translations c22
05/14/19 Helli Translations c21
04/15/19 Helli Translations c20
04/10/19 Helli Translations c19
04/07/19 Helli Translations c18
04/04/19 Helli Translations c17
04/01/19 Helli Translations c16
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7 Reviews sorted by


jadelin
jadelin rated it
December 17, 2018
Status: Completed
There are warnings on the darkness of this story, so people who don't like this genre should hold back from automatically giving it a one-star. The plot is actually is about redemption, though there's psychological abuse (and some physical abuse -- though the worst of that is in the beginning), but there is a lot of hilarious irony in the story at the same time. I'm not the translator, but I've read many works from this author, and the author's stories are often complex, darkly funny, and layered and actually... more>> NOT reader-emotional-manipulation stories. This is also not a tragedy, but has a pretty cool ending.

The author's works: https://www. Novelupdates. Com/nauthor/%E8%A5%BF%E5%AD%90%E7%BB%AA/

Spoiler

The story has a happy ending.

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rhianirory
rhianirory rated it
April 12, 2019
Status: Completed
this was very different from what I expected (in a good way). I enjoyed it but this isn't a novel for everyone and it covers some really dark subject matter. And I didn't find any of the comedy that's promised by the tags. It was, however, very thought provoking at times; it certainly made me think about the nature of mental illness, and the way love is expressed, among other things.

... more>>
Spoiler

for a while I thought his rebirth might really be the split personality disorder they suspected, which would have made this story unique in the rebirth genre. Sadly they went the usual supernatural route in the end.

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it is a HE but I still find it a little unsettling, which is, I suspect, partly what the author was aiming for. Now here's the question; is it still self-love and narcissism if the person you fall in love with is another version of yourself, or is it different when your in a different body and the two of you have different life experiences, even if you were the same person up to the moment of divergence? Things to ponder. All in all, this novel interesting and squicky in turns and well worth the read.
Spoiler

i found his making out with his own reflection and getting off on it disturbing. It's not even close to the worst scenes in the book but it's the one that really stands out in my head and will squick me out the longest

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OHtheNovelty
OHtheNovelty rated it
April 6, 2019
Status: Completed
In a weird and morbid way, this story is really interesting. I didn't really know what to feel when I first plunged into this but after MTLing the whole story, I've got to say, this was a really good read.

To call this selfcest........ is not wrong. But at the same time....... it doesn't feel like it.

It's more like, the author wrote the story in a way that one's nature can change from their life experience, so because past!ML went through a different love life than current!ML, past!ML is no longer... more>> the current!ML. The two are now two different entities.

Which is weird, because not a lot of people believe in this. But I can see the reasoning so....I'm not too bothered.

The reason I'm not too bothered is because the personalities can be described as this: naiive, impulsive, stubborn and possessive ML x depressed, elegant, calm and cunning MC.

Two totally different people.

Also, the romance is definitely not as passionate as other stories. I figured it would go down like this, and I guess I'm not too sad about it. The romance isn't big between the MC and the ML because MC is trying to find forgiveness for his sins so there's a lot of angst and little feelings between them. And even when feelings begin, it's a calm love. Like a friendship between two broken people.

This story is definitely crazy, and I would have written things differently, but I appreciate what the author did and find it remarkable how their writing style can keep a sane person hooked on an insane novel like this one. <<less
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GrimmyAF
GrimmyAF rated it
July 9, 2019
Status: Completed
Is this a love story? Maybe. Is this a tragedy? No.

Does this have a happy ending?

... more>>
Spoiler

(Yes.)

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This isn't a happy story, and the warnings on the novel probably isn't enough. There's r*pe, emotional manipulation, mental and physical abuse, you name a creepy yandere act, it's probably here, and not in a romantic yandere love interest way either.

Personally, I feel it showcases mental illness quite well, albeit dramaticised because book, but not "Oh, mental illness?! Well here's some love and you're cured!" Same with the dissociation, and that absolute lethargicness that comes with depression.

Furthermore, there's an explanation for why MC went through this reincarnation, and why certain scenarios that happened in the past happened again in the new timeline.

Is it narcissism?

No, I don't think so.
Spoiler

MC and ML are really two different people by the end up of the book. Towards the end, this fact is reiterated, that even with some similarities, the current MC isn't the same as the ML. Butterfly wings or otherwise, a person is made up of the sum of their experiences, even with the same childhood, their adult life was very different, and the actions taken changed everything.

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Does MC and up loving ML?

Who knows? My personal opinion, but I don't think MC loves ML in the way the previous him loved Original CQQ. But is it love? Probably.

Spoiler

As the Original CQQ said, the only one that could love LZF was probably LZF. The readers know that what LZF feels for both CQQs is love, a twisted, seriously yandere version of love, but still love. But the original CQQ didn't think so, and didn't believe him. For good reason.

But the LZF in CQQ's body knows what LZF feels, knows that this obsession is love, knows what LZF thinks when acting in a certain manner, and that changed everything.

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Cons:

Dog blood! Dog blood everywhere!

I didn't like how some of the relatives were made to be horrid creatures, and all the mentions of breaking legs was breaking my suspension of disbelief.

Also, the ending seemed a little rushed, there probably could have been a couple chapters more before diving straight into the last bit. It still wrapped up everything nicely.

Spoiler

And loose ends! What happened to ZM???

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Probably more, but I'm still on the high from reading it.

Pros:

I really liked how the MC went with a you do me no harm, I won't go against you policy. Too many times, Reincarnated MCs act as if they can't live if they don't face slap every other day.

This book does have face slapping, but the people that MC hated in his past life weren't harmed, but instead, everything was based on the acts against him (or more accurately, the acts and CQQ in this this life).

TL;DR:

This is a good read, different from the standard reincarnation books with an interesting premise. Despite the dark premise, it doesn't have a tragedy tag for good reason. Give it a whirl if you don't mind the warnings in the tags, and don't mind a slower paced love (?) story. <<less
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Lahell
Lahell rated it
March 22, 2019
Status: Completed
The story is suited to people who like angst, bitter irony and crying... it is really cathartic.

The novel is well written and worth the read.

The MC and the ML are technically the same person, so if you know this is not your cup of tea don't read this. Although I have to admit that it didn't disturb me as much as I thought it would. (Especially because the focus is not the "romance" but the psychological aspects of the MC)
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dona
dona rated it
March 23, 2019
Status: c13
Seeing the pitiful few reviews, I decided to leave one as well in hope more people will give this novel a chance. Now usually (99% of times) I´m very harsh and stingy when it comes to giving 4-5 stars, so it´s been a while I´ve been generous with my reviews. I actually got hooked and read all 13 chapters in one hour.

It´s about obsessive, unhealthy love-which I love reading about, but the author has done a twist. There are plenty of novels about body swaps, but what´s unique about this... more>> one is that the abuser, ML, enters the body of his captive, the one whom he longed for and tortured for so many years. And now he has to suffer for all that he had done by his own hands.

Truthfully this deserves at best 4 stars because the story was a little bit unrealistic (in modern times it´s near impossible to torture someone to THAT extent without receiving help), if the author had set it in ancient times then it would be more real. Also the writing itself leaves much to be desired, it´s amateurish and not as descriptive as I wish it was, however the plot really hooked me, I don´t think I´ve ever seen a plot similar to this one. Really excited for future updates! <<less
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Hilyantomi
Hilyantomi rated it
August 9, 2019
Status: Completed
To be honest, I don't know how to rate this novel. Personally I consider it as the WORST WRITTEN novel of the author (the plot is worth to know QAQ). Like everyone said, Mary Sue ahem dog blood is everywhere :D

I'd only recommend the novel for those who want to try to have a heavier taste of physical maltreatment. Any white lotus are warned to stop giving low rating please :D and those who are both experienced in reading "sadomasochism" might get bored easily :D
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