Turns Out I’m Crazy

Description

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Lu Zhengfei killed Chen Qianqing.

He disabled Chen Qianqing’s legs, and blinded his eyes, locking him up with chains in his house. Then, he watched with his eyes wide as he died.

Injuries inflicted in the name of love would always end in tragedy.

Did Lu Zhengfei regret it? Of course, he did. And so, God gave him another chance.

But this time, he found that he himself—became Chen Qianqing.

Associated Names
One entry per line
我原来是个神经病
Related Series
N/A
Recommendations
Quickly Wear the Face of the Devil (2)
Sickly Tyrannical (2)
Supernatural Movie Actor App (2)
Quick Transmigration: Fate Trading System (1)
Kill the Lights (1)
A Smile from the Villain (1)
Recommendation Lists
  1. Switch!! Gong->Shou Shou->Gong
  2. BL Novels to explore
  3. Sad and tragedy novels
  4. want to read
  5. Pick your Poison [BL]

Latest Release

Date Group Release
07/29/22 Tabby Translations c48
06/01/22 Tabby Translations c47
05/27/22 Helli Translations c31
05/18/22 Tabby Translations c46
05/07/22 Tabby Translations c45
05/03/22 Tabby Translations c44
04/24/22 Tabby Translations c43
04/16/22 Tabby Translations c42
04/11/22 Tabby Translations c41
04/01/22 Tabby Translations c40
03/26/22 Tabby Translations c39
03/23/22 Tabby Translations c38
03/19/22 Tabby Translations c37
03/08/22 Tabby Translations c36
03/04/22 Tabby Translations c35
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Review
38 Reviews


JayeWhy
New JayeWhy
Mar 27, 2024
Status: Completed
This was really well-written. As many reviewers noted, both main characters felt like different people, and although this is self-cest, the progression of 'love' comes in a very natural (dog-blooded and angsty) way. It was really interesting seeing the MC be faced with the consequences of his actions first-hand, and I would go as far as to say that rather than self-love, this novel reads more like self-acceptance. MC is full of self-loathing in the beginning, and as the novel progresses, you can see him start to accept and forgive... more>> himself for his actions and admit how flawed he was and how doomed their relationship (with og lover) is from the very beginning. The novel's very poignant and I cried through like two-thirds of it. <<less
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waiting for it to rain
New waiting for
Mar 10, 2024
Status: Completed
Wow... just... wow. Honestly I'd like to start by saying this had been on my 'to read' list for a very long time - simply because I really like this author. However, I've always been put off by the description, LOL. Alas, I ran out of things to read and decided to give it a go and WOW. It was really worth it. If I had to speculate, the reason why the ratings on this novel is only 4.4 is due to people who can't handle selfcest. The plot, the... more>> writing, the characterisation - as long as you get past the selfcest (which by the way, not weird at all?) then you'll realise how amazing all of it is.

NOTE: Despite the heavy themes, there are quite a few instances with comedic undertone, so don't think the read will be all depressing. Theres some light parts, I promise! Xi ZiXu is known for her story gap-moe...

The book is had sufficient drama, not too much - just right. I'm surprised at how well the author wrote the romance? I thought it'd be difficult to accept but the redemption and the progression of the characters, especially the main leads, was really smooth. Every thing flowed well and it just CLICKS, you know?

By the end, the two characters are very, very different. So you don't have to worry. I also found it a bit hard to picture - but you'll see clearly that the main leads are two very different people. <<less
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jadelin
jadelin
Dec 17, 2018
Status: Completed
There are warnings on the darkness of this story, so people who don't like this genre should hold back from automatically giving it a one-star. The plot is actually is about redemption, though there's psychological abuse (and some physical abuse -- though the worst of that is in the beginning), but there is a lot of hilarious irony in the story at the same time. I'm not the translator, but I've read many works from this author, and the author's stories are often complex, darkly funny, and layered and actually NOT reader-emotional-manipulation stories. This is also not a tragedy, but has a pretty cool ending.

The author's works: https://www. Novelupdates. Com/nauthor/%E8%A5%BF%E5%AD%90%E7%BB%AA/

Spoiler

The story has a happy ending.

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OHtheNovelty
OHtheNovelty
Apr 06, 2019
Status: Completed
In a weird and morbid way, this story is really interesting. I didn't really know what to feel when I first plunged into this but after MTLing the whole story, I've got to say, this is a really good read.

To call this selfcest........ is not wrong. But at the same time....... it doesn't feel like it.

It's more like, the author wrote the story in a way that one's nature can change from their life experience, so because past!ML went through a different love life than current!ML, past!ML is no longer... more>> the current!ML. The two are now two different entities.

Which is weird, because not a lot of people believe in this. But I can see the reasoning so....I'm not too bothered.

The reason I'm not too bothered is because the personalities can be described as this: naiive, impulsive, stubborn and possessive ML x depressed, elegant, calm and cunning MC.

Two totally different people.

Also, the romance is definitely not as passionate as other stories. I figured it would go down like this, and I guess I'm not too sad about it. The romance isn't big between the MC and the ML because MC is trying to find forgiveness for his sins so there's a lot of angst and little feelings between them. And even when feelings begin, it's a calm love. Like a friendship between two broken people.

This story is definitely crazy, and I would have written things differently, but I appreciate what the author did and find it remarkable how their writing style can keep a sane person hooked on an insane novel like this one. <<less
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GrimmyAF
GrimmyAF
Jul 09, 2019
Status: Completed
Is this a love story? Maybe. Is this a tragedy? No.

Does this have a happy ending?

... more>>
Spoiler

(Yes.)

[collapse]

This isn't a happy story, and the warnings on the novel probably isn't enough. There's r*pe, emotional manipulation, mental and physical abuse, you name a creepy yandere act, it's probably here, and not in a romantic yandere love interest way either.

Personally, I feel it showcases mental illness quite well, albeit dramaticised because book, but not "Oh, mental illness?! Well here's some love and you're cured!" Same with the dissociation, and that absolute lethargicness that comes with depression.

Furthermore, there's an explanation for why MC went through this reincarnation, and why certain scenarios that happened in the past happened again in the new timeline.

Is it narcissism?

No, I don't think so.
Spoiler

MC and ML are really two different people by the end up of the book. Towards the end, this fact is reiterated, that even with some similarities, the current MC isn't the same as the ML. Butterfly wings or otherwise, a person is made up of the sum of their experiences, even with the same childhood, their adult life was very different, and the actions taken changed everything.

[collapse]

Does MC and up loving ML?

Who knows? My personal opinion, but I don't think MC loves ML in the way the previous him loved Original CQQ. But is it love? Probably.

Spoiler

As the Original CQQ said, the only one that could love LZF was probably LZF. The readers know that what LZF feels for both CQQs is love, a twisted, seriously yandere version of love, but still love. But the original CQQ didn't think so, and didn't believe him. For good reason.

But the LZF in CQQ's body knows what LZF feels, knows that this obsession is love, knows what LZF thinks when acting in a certain manner, and that changed everything.

[collapse]

Cons:

Dog blood! Dog blood everywhere!

I didn't like how some of the relatives were made to be horrid creatures, and all the mentions of breaking legs was breaking my suspension of disbelief.

Also, the ending seemed a little rushed, there probably could have been a couple chapters more before diving straight into the last bit. It still wrapped up everything nicely.

Spoiler

And loose ends! What happened to ZM???

[collapse]

Probably more, but I'm still on the high from reading it.

Pros:

I really liked how the MC went with a you do me no harm, I won't go against you policy. Too many times, Reincarnated MCs act as if they can't live if they don't face slap every other day.

This book does have face slapping, but the people that MC hated in his past life weren't harmed, but instead, everything was based on the acts against him (or more accurately, the acts and CQQ in this this life).

TL;DR:

This is a good read, different from the standard reincarnation books with an interesting premise. Despite the dark premise, it doesn't have a tragedy tag for good reason. Give it a whirl if you don't mind the warnings in the tags, and don't mind a slower paced love (?) story. <<less
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Suyo
Suyo
Sep 12, 2021
Status: Completed
I have never expected this novel to be this good. I recommend it. You can tell this novel has a new story. The writer did a very good job.
I wanted to say the description is a bit wrong. Lu Zhengfei didn't literally kill Chen Qianqing.

After I completed this novel I feel very complicated. I don't really know what I should feel. Even my feelings toward the original Lu Zhengfei and Chen Qianqing are very complicated. I loved and hated them at the same time. I felt bad for them... more>> and wanted to kick them at the same time.

You can feel the characters' emotions. It's so real and human. In the beginning, I can't deny I hated and scolded Lu Zhengfei and say his love isn't love. However, as I read the story I could not deny Lu Zhengfei's love anymore. I could not help feeling bad for him. He loves him even though his love is so twisted. I can't help but agree with the reborn Lu Zhengfei about their relationship.

Spoiler

I couldn't help feel bad and cry when I read about the chocolate LZ made. He learned how to cook for CQ but CQ has never eaten it. When LZ made chocolate for QC, CQ throw it in the tr*sh can. He waited until CQ leaves to take it from the tr*sh can and eat it. In this life, LZ gave the reborn LZ the same chocolate and the reborn LZ ate it. The reborn LZ was very sad when he saw LZ happy because he ate it. He said in the end the only one who eats the chocolate is himself.

[collapse]

Let's talk about the relationship between the original Chen Qianqing and Lu Zhengfei from the beginning before LZ commit any crime

Spoiler

The two of them were very close friends. Then LZ told CQ he loved him but CQ refused him. After that CQ became cold to LZ. He's no longer answers his calls. He no longer talks to him when he meets him. He told him he's a pe*vert for loving a man. He told him he's straight. After months LZ goes crazy and threatened him to be in a relationship with him. However, what CQ didn't know is the fact LZ threats were empty threats because he couldn't really hurt the people CQ likes. What LZ didn't know was that CQ found out he is gay. However, LZ didn't know that. If he had known CQ was gay he would've never forced him into a relationship. That's why the reborn LZ cried so much when he knew. Because all he wanted is a small hope and he will do his best. The threats part was the beginning of their downfall. Maybe if LZ give him some time their relationship would be different.

[collapse]

I won't point out LZ mistakes because we can all tell what it is. The crimes he did were too obvious anyone can tell what he did wrong. That's why I will talk about the original CQ. He talks big but in fact, he's too weak and too s*upid. The only person he can be brave with is LZ. The reason why I think he's too weak is

Spoiler

he is gay but he's too afraid that anyone will find out. I can understand a little why he feels that but I feel he's not only disgusted by LZ but he's disgusted with himself. He can't accept himself. I bet if LZ wasn't there he will just marry a woman because of his fairness. Actually, I think this is the main problem why he hated LZ even before LZ did anything to hurt him.

[collapse]

there are many reasons why I think he's s*upid

Spoiler

Firstly, he just believed everyone literally everyone walking in the streets but he won't believe LZ and I don't know why. Clearly, he can see all these people hated him so why he believed them?
Secondly, he didn't believe LZ loved him. He always thought he was a plaything. I can understand that was because of the words of the people around LZ but he was your friend for a long time don't you know him?
even if he was affected by their words that time but after he saw how LZ suffers because of their relationship how could he not know? Who gonna get hit to the point to enter the hospital and be locked up for a plaything? Who will get married with a plaything?

The most important reason why I think he is s*upid because he didn't use LZ at all. Clearly, LZ told him he can do anything but he can't dump him so why he didn't tell him about the people how hurt him? Why didn't try to communicate with LZ? He just keeps running away even though he knows he can't. Why doing that to yourself when you can live your life normally. Knowing your limits is the smartest thing to do why he chose to torture himself like this. "I don't mean it was CQ's fault because he was the victim. But could have made his life so much better"

[collapse]

to be honest I think the original CQ liked LZ in the beginning. The reasons why I think like this are

Spoiler

Because firstly CQ found out he's gay at the same time LZ was chasing him. If he didn't feel anything towards LZ why would he found out he's a gay only after LZ appears in his life.
Secondly, LZ thought CQ was with him just because he threatened him but if CQ become with him for this reason why would he still run away without any care about his parents? If he really believes in LZ threats why would he run away alone? Not to forget that despite anything CQ lived with LZ for months but only choose to run away after he heard his classmate's hurtful words.

[collapse]

I think the reason why from the beginning CQ was hostile towards LZ even before LZ commit any crime was that CQ afraid from

Spoiler

the fact he is gay. He's someone who is very weak and afraid of people's judgment.

[collapse]

he just needed time. I believe if LZ didn't rush things and took it slowly they would have been very happy. LZ took the biggest blame for their suffering. They just needed more communication. That why I wish LZ was reborn so he can make up to CQ.

about the ending

Spoiler

it was a happy ending but I felt bad for LZ. It's so sad to end with yourself. Even though they're like different people now. But I still feel bad. The earth is so big but the only one who can accept and love you is yourself. That was sad and lonely.

[collapse]

about the reborn LZ and LZ. After I read about them I couldn't help thinking about many thoughts. I felt if I were to see the past me I would feel the same as the reborn LZ. I will feel ashamed about the way I was acting. I will desire to hit me too.
The reborn LZ and LZ ended up being different people. Because what we go through in our life made us the person we are now. We are not the same person in past. We won't be the same person we are now if we didn't go through what we go through in the past. If we went through different circumstances we won't be the same people we are today. What you go through made you.

In this story, LZ was the criminal how hurt CQ. At the same time, he was the victim. And he was the only criminal who made himself the victim. He hurt CQ so much but he hurt himself too. He wasn't happy and CQ wasn't happy either. He destroyed both of them because he didn't know when to let go. Time makes people forget everything. Not that they will literally forget but their feelings will cool as time goes by.
Spoiler

just like what the reborn LZ said. He forgot his feelings towards CQ when he met him after 5 years.

[collapse]

if LZ knew when to let go, he and CQ would be so happy now.
everyone deserves someone who likes them why bother to keep someone who doesn't love you? <<less
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warspite
warspite
Jan 31, 2022
Status: --
I love how dark and depressing selfcest is. Yes, dark and depressing. The main character is sinful enough and what he did to that certain character was beyond forgiveness. For me, to throw the MC into a selfcest is very agonizing and I think he deserves it. If you'll look at the darker side of things, it was not redemption but rather retribution. From the moment he entered his lover's body, he was alone. Alone by himself. He is he and he is also the one who he is with.... more>> You'll get me if you read this. The thought actually scares me. <<less
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Melange
Melange
Oct 03, 2020
Status: Completed
This novel is good in a twisted, disturbing way. The author goes through great lengths make the reader feel mindf*cked and they're quite successful at it.

Full disclosure, this is not a remotely happy or fluffy novel. Even the ending is somewhat strange and the 'happy' ending is relative. If you are not comfortable with r*pe, imprisonment, abuse, and selfcest, turn back now.

It starts off in a confusing way, where MC, who originally goes by the name Lu Zhengfei, takes his life after essentially killing his "lover" Chen Qianqing. Even calling... more>> him a lover is probably too much, because MC never treated Chen Qianqing properly, leading him to become a blind, depressed, and dying cripple.

Due to this, MC is reborn into the body of Chen Qianqing, and he meets ML who is a younger version of himself, Lu Zhengfei. The novel subsequently details MC's slow descent into madness as he tries to embody the role of 'Chen Qianqing' and fulfill the original owner's wishes. He attempts to utilize his knowledge of his past life in order to punish both himself and ML, as he realizes how horribly he had treated the original Chen Qianqing. This eventually leads to a complete mental break for MC as he struggles to separate himself from the role of 'Chen Qianqing' and whoever it is he has turned out to be. MC comes to the conclusion that there will never be a happy ending for Lu Zhengfei and Chen Qianqing, and this is true.

Nonetheless, the author manages to redeem the two broken characters and salvage this novel into a happy ending.

Spoiler

Although there can never be a happy ending between Lu Zhengfei and Chen Qianqing, this is only true for the original Chen Qianqing. When original Chen Qianqing notes that the only person who can make Lu Zhengfei happy is Lu Zhengfei, he meant it quite literally.

Rest assured, original Chen Qianqing has a happy ending as well, despite being dead for the entirety of the novel.

[collapse]

As for MC and ML, are they truly the same person? I would say no, because 'you' as a person, are the culmination of all of your experiences up until the present, and a divergence at any point in the past would result in a person who is no longer 'you.' The resulting individual might share a 99.99% resemblance to you, but they are still not 'you.'

In the same way, the MC and ML might have been the same person in the past, but their experiences greatly differed over time and they eventually became two distinct people. MC and ML might share some of the same habits, but MC is far more critical and cold, while ML grows to be more accommodating and emotional.

There's no gore or anything of that nature in this novel, so if you don't mind the aforementioned warnings, then feel free to give this novel a shot if you're looking for something more unique. <<less
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rhianirory
rhianirory
Apr 12, 2019
Status: Completed
this was very different from what I expected (in a good way). I enjoyed it but this isn't a novel for everyone and it covers some really dark subject matter. And I didn't find any of the comedy that's promised by the tags. It was, however, very thought provoking at times; it certainly made me think about the nature of mental illness, and the way love is expressed, among other things.

... more>>
Spoiler

for a while I thought his rebirth might really be the split personality disorder they suspected, which would have made this story unique in the rebirth genre. Sadly they went the usual supernatural route in the end.

[collapse]

it is a HE but I still find it a little unsettling, which is, I suspect, partly what the author was aiming for. Now here's the question; is it still self-love and narcissism if the person you fall in love with is another version of yourself, or is it different when your in a different body and the two of you have different life experiences, even if you were the same person up to the moment of divergence? Things to ponder. All in all, this novel interesting and squicky in turns and well worth the read.
Spoiler

i found his making out with his own reflection and getting off on it disturbing. It's not even close to the worst scenes in the book but it's the one that really stands out in my head and will squick me out the longest

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<<less
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ishrocks18
ishrocks18
Jul 21, 2020
Status: c31
It is a devastating good read. Sometimes I like the ML, sometimes I hate him for what he has done. The author has really done a good job in portraying the emotion of an yandere including the translator. Great read.
Why he reincarnated?

Spoiler

The reason of his reincarnation was because the original MC wants him to feel the pain he felt.

[collapse]
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di_immortales
di_immortale
May 01, 2022
Status: read
I usually don't read the shounen ai genre. But this plot kinda attracted me;;

Anyway, I read it.

The author is a genius. The psychological descriptions are hair raising and stirring. ... more>>
Spoiler

There's a happy ending. Don't be fooled by the 'first' ending. I got a shock, man.

[collapse]

I love how they didn't just round it up like 'I decided to be selfish for once' because that only fits in with good characters. The protagonist is a sinful demon. He's trying to atone. And finally, after
Spoiler

meeting the original, he loves himself.

[collapse]
And no, it's not narcissism. They're two separate entities now. I mean, if you want to think of it like that, sure, I guess. But I advise otherwise.

Spoiler

To be honest, the relationship between the two LZs is cute and satisfying and morbidly beautiful, until when compared to the OG CQ who ends up with an all powerful shadow who loves him... it seems pitiful, but it's still beautiful anyway. It just... highlights how LZ can only love himself, and no one else can ever love him.

[collapse]

Suyo's review encompasses the other things I observed. Haha im just lazy to write more...

Well, all in all, it's a mind-twisting, extremely disturbing read which makes you feel guilty for reading it.
Spoiler

Especially the scene where he makes out with himself in the mirror, like, an extremely wtf scene. No, a wtaf wtf wtf wtf million times wtf. Your mind will be filled with some violent words after reading that scene.

[collapse]

And of course, there's that scene which is subtle, but mind-breakingly significant.

Spoiler

"You don't know how much I envy you, Li Zhengfei."

Of course, LZ was startled. Split personality disorder suspicion. But, I mean, like he cares. It was cleared up afterward. LZ likes the CQ after bc previous one would never forgive him. Split personality accepts him. Anyway, LZ will have 'CQs' love in this life. Lucky little shat.

[collapse]

And lastly, it was all his fault. Everything could've had a happy ending if he wasn't him. His personality is incompatible with the original CQ.

AIEEEEEEEEEEEEIEEIEIEIEIEE-

Surry, too many spoilery spoilers just realized ;;;; :|| <<less
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Lahell
Lahell
Mar 22, 2019
Status: Completed
The story is suited to people who like angst, bitter irony and crying... it is really cathartic.

The novel is well written and worth the read.

The MC and the ML are technically the same person, so if you know this is not your cup of tea don't read this. Although I have to admit that it didn't disturb me as much as I thought it would. (Especially because the focus is not the "romance" but the psychological aspects of the MC)
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Hilyantomi
Hilyantomi
Aug 09, 2019
Status: Completed
To be honest, I don't know how to rate this novel. Personally I consider it as the WORST WRITTEN novel of the author (the plot is worth to know QAQ). Like everyone said, Mary Sue ahem dog blood is everywhere :D

I'd only recommend the novel for those who want to try to have a heavier taste of physical maltreatment. Any white lotus are warned to stop giving low rating please :D and those who are both experienced in reading "sadomasochism" might get bored easily :D
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probablyanna80
probablyanna
Apr 13, 2022
Status: c32
I originally read this a few months ago up until the last available translation, chapter 32. I ended up MTL'ing the rest, but I am so grateful that Tabby Translations has picked this up because MTL can't compete with a proper translation. I definitely plan to re-read it.

It is one of my all time favorites! I can't stop thinking about it. This might be one of the darkest stories I've ever read, but also one of the most interesting. It starts off at the end of this tragic "relationship". The... more>> ML gets reborn as the MC during a time where the MC and ML had already met and things were horribly wrong between them. He decides to take revenge on his self (a younger version of the ML) because he hates himself and the torture he put the original MC through. His soul is older when he's reborn into that time period, so he has more life experience and obviously knows how to manipulate his younger self, but he still gets abused by his younger self. He also gets to see how the original MC was bullied by others that he previously never knew about and take revenge on them as well. It's a very interesting story on karma, retribution, perspective, mental illness, forgiveness, learning to love yourself (no pun intended). <<less
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Neleothesze
Neleothesze
Mar 31, 2022
Status: Completed
It's a really good read but there are some possible triggers (s*xual and emotional abuse, mental instability, etc) so mind the tags.

Also, it must be said, the story is from OG!Lu Zhengfei's point of view so we have an unreliable narrator. There's some character growth in his second life but OG!LZF still has a tendency to shift blame or downplay the severity of his previous actions. It's more realistic this way but it does make reading some bits uncomfortable.... more>>
Spoiler

No, you a**hole, the r*pe victim shouldn't have to compromise with the rapist to avoid further physical violence.
-or-
The fact that the captive doesn't try to empathise with their 'captor's difficulties' is not s*upidity, it's a visceral reaction.

[collapse]

He learns, in time, but both the OG!LZF and the young!LZF still have some attachment/mental issues. Thankfully, their happy end doesn't destroy other people's lives.

In the end, I suppose the greatest lesson is that if you can't love yourself, who will? <<less
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AngelsFall
AngelsFall
Jul 24, 2020
Status: Completed
This is maybe one of the books where you are not sure if you want to give it a try, so you start reading the reviews. I hope I can explain some of the points you want to know and why you should or shouldn't read it. I'll try to avoid spoilers so don't worry about me ruining your fun.

First of all a warning: This book contains r*pe, imprisonment, abusive characters, mentions of self-harming and su*cide and is able to influence the readers mental wellbeing. Please do not read if... more>> you are uncomfortable with any of the tags in the description.

In my opinion is this one of the best dark bl novels I have ever read. I didn't need to pause between the 78 chapters at all and it was interesting until the very end. The writing and the translation are also very good, even the mtl chapters (after ch 30) are relatively easy to understand. So if you're still not scared of from this warning, let's look at the plot.

Background:
The protagonist is Lu Zhengfei the heir of a big family. He fell in love with a younger college student named Chen Qianqing. Unfortunately Chen was straight and had no interest in Lu. After Lu realised that Chen didn't want to be together with him at all, he used force to imprison him by his side. With the influence of Lu family, Chen lost every chance of freedom and couldn't even talk to his friends and family about his situation.
Chen hated Lu for the things he had done to him and died after almost 10 years of mental torture. Lu was devastated after the death of his loved one and followed him soon after.
Chapter 1:
Lu awakens in a hospital and quickly realises that he has become Chen. He only wishes to die but doesn't want to to harm the body of his most important person, so he decides to live Chens life as a form of retribution.

Characters:

Lu is the protagonist/ MC. He is also the gong/seme/top/... (however you want to name it). His character is very controlling, headstrong and he is very intelligent. He is very cold and cruel to everyone outside a small bunch of family and friends. His greatest fear is that Chen somehow manages to escape and leave him. He basically wants to give him everything he asks for, except his freedom.
Chen is the victim of Lus abusive love. He is stubborn, kind and positive but also prideful and wants to carry everything on his own. During his imprisonment he sinks into depression and wants nothing more than to hurt his tormentor as much as he hurts him.

The both of them were stubborn, insecure and not willing to negotiate so their relationship got worse with the time. It was not possible to hold a serious conversation without an argument. After he got reborn Lu realises many things about Chen and their relationship he didn't knew before.

The ending:

Spoiler

The ending isn't a typical happy ending (I don't think many expected one ?‍♀‍) but it is very beautiful. It's a bit rushed but the four bonus chapters softened the impact a bit. I'm sure there could have been more without making it boring and repetitive and some questions aren't really explained. But in the end the ending fits the story and the overall atmosphere.

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I'm sure you all know what I'm talking about (if you read my warning at the beginning ?). This book is not for children. It contains smut (short and not in detail but it is there), abuse, depression and other dark issues.

All in all it is a really great book. The balance between the toxic relationship and the happy elements like Chens family, his friends and his will to live is beautiful and doesn't exhaust the reader. It is a really unique gem and I am grateful that I gave it a chance. <<less
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Lazyreader1324
Lazyreader13
Mar 19, 2022
Status: Completed
Translation: 5/5

Story: 4.5/5

Mtl: 4/5

I like the overall story, it was really strange at first because the MC abuse Chen qianqing and it was really strange cause its definitely a self-cest story but actually not.

Its so strange but at the same time its a good story, I dropped this in the past but now rereading it again using mtl chapters. Its actually fun to read. You guys should read the mtl version of this book, it is understable.
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Queen7
Nov 18, 2021
Status: Completed
Guys what was the ending? It was a bit confusing, but what happened to the Lu Zhengfei after his sister kill Chen Qianqing (aka LZ) ? Or when Lu Zhengfei who die in Chen Qianqing's body, what happened to him and the real Chen Qianqing after? Did they end up together? Also what was the last wish of the real Chen Qianqing too? And why did LZ said what he had said to CQ at the end? How did everything unfold at the end?? Please I'm desperate. I need answersTT.... more>> I don't know if you can reply back but here's my insta: @__3unoia <<less
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CoffeeForMyLazySelf
CoffeeForMyL
Jun 12, 2021
Status: Completed
I admit, halfway through the story, I was starting to get bored with this novel. But I just can't seem to stop reading, I also really want to see the ending so I stayed and read till the end.

I was not disappointed at all! Although there were a few plot holes and the ending was unsatisfying...

There were moments in the novel that I bursted out laughing, such as the Extras.

... more>>
Spoiler

I actually laughed really hard when Lu Zhengfei (ML) cried while saying to MC that he won't give birth after he just woke up from dreaming that he got pregnant with MC's baby and is giving birth🤣

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Fun Fact: I actually found the MC a little bland, since he rarely show his emotions in the story, he just seems like he's always indifferent. He's also actually one of the reasons I found the novel boring.

ML on the other hand is pretty ok to me, his character is portrayed well and he is one of the reasons I stayed until the end of the story.

Also, I'm quite unsatisfied that Zhou Mo was not mentioned on the story later on and we know nothing about what happend to him seeing that he is MC's roommate after all.

And lastly, about the ending, I actually find it really unsatisfying.

Spoiler

MC didn't really confess his love for ML until the end, I don't even know if MC do love ML.

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Well, it was still a pretty good read! It got me hooked that even when I started to think about dropping this, I just can't since I really wanna know what happens next.

So all in all, its still 5/5 <<less
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summerspring
summerspring
Jun 12, 2020
Status: Completed
I actually really really liked this story. It was painful but I felt that the story was well written and didn't have any boring extra stuff that wasn't necessary to the plot development. So the shortness was accomplished in what some novels try to do in 100+ chapters. It is a novel full of mystery and leaves you thinking. Translation on point and for the rest of the chappies I read original through google translate. Truly a novel worth supporting!
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1Sami
1Sami
Apr 08, 2020
Status: c51
I've been following this story for 2 years now and I just couldn't wait for more updates so I started to MTL it. It's one of my favorite novels and if you stick with it, I guarantee you won't be let down! The way the MCs thoughts are shown and hide it switches POV so you can see what the ML is thinking is great. And how the MC reacts when faced with himself is amazing!
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dona
dona
Mar 23, 2019
Status: c13
Seeing the pitiful few reviews, I decided to leave one as well in hope more people will give this novel a chance. Now usually (99% of times) I´m very harsh and stingy when it comes to giving 4-5 stars, so it´s been a while I´ve been generous with my reviews. I actually got hooked and read all 13 chapters in one hour.

It´s about obsessive, unhealthy love-which I love reading about, but the author has done a twist. There are plenty of novels about body swaps, but what´s unique about this... more>> one is that the abuser, ML, enters the body of his captive, the one whom he longed for and tortured for so many years. And now he has to suffer for all that he had done by his own hands.

Truthfully this deserves at best 4 stars because the story was a little bit unrealistic (in modern times it´s near impossible to torture someone to THAT extent without receiving help), if the author had set it in ancient times then it would be more real. Also the writing itself leaves much to be desired, it´s amateurish and not as descriptive as I wish it was, however the plot really hooked me, I don´t think I´ve ever seen a plot similar to this one. Really excited for future updates! <<less
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