I Am Not Fit to Be the Male Lead’s First Love


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Only after Chu Yin died did she realize she was the first love (white moonlight) of the male lead in a novel.

The stubborn male lead fell in love with her at first sight when he was young, then took over the company when he was older.

Chu Yin was tortured by his crazy possessiveness and died a tragic early death.

Opening her eyes again, she returned to the day before she transferred schools and met Lu Zhen.

“Ding~ Bound to the learning system! Host can change the original script of the novel by learning!”

【You can change a word from the original script after completing homework!】

【If you place first in your grade, you can change one sentence in the original script!】

【If you place first in the college entrance examination, you can create your own ending!

Get rich! Be famous! Do whatever you want!】

That night, Chu Yin finished her homework and obtain the reward to change a word in the original script: “On the day of their first encounter, Lu Zhen walked into the school as light rain poured down the sky.”

The next day, Lu Zhen walked into the school, and a knife suddenly fell from the sky.

Young Lu Zhen: ?

Someone wants my life.


The whole school knew that the daughter of the Chu family from the countryside swept the entire grade and placed first, and also took the throne of the school’s flower.

But one day, the whole school went crazy, saying that she somehow provoke the big devil Lu Zhen.

After doing bad things to the male lead, Chu Yin was cornered, feeling a little guilty.

The young man in front of her was like a trapped beast, his dark eyes that was restrained for two lifetimes, showed madness: “Want my life?”

“——Take it.”

Associated Names
One entry per line
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Recommendation Lists
  1. Delicate mixture of sweets and angst
  2. chinese novels that i've read
  3. Read with no regrets
  4. top tier novels
  5. Top BG Romance Novels on JJWXC ~ (CN Edition)

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06/08/22 Tinker Releases c69 part2
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12/11/21 Tinker Releases c67 part2
12/10/21 Tinker Releases c67 part1
11/29/21 Tinker Releases c66 part2
11/26/21 Tinker Releases c66 part1
11/24/21 Tinker Releases c65 part2
11/22/21 Tinker Releases c65 part1
11/13/21 Tinker Releases c64 part3
11/12/21 Tinker Releases c64 part2
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92 Reviews sorted by

September 7, 2020
Status: ongoing
Interesting story. The FL tries her best to avoid the ML and create a negative impression to make him hate her. Much to her dismay, all her hard efforts never seem to work out.

The FL is very likeable and has an entertaining attitude towards the ml, often calling him a dog man. She puts a lot of effort in studying this time and getting her revenge on the ml.

... more>>

Going into this, I was already quite irritated. I was wondering how the novel was going to justify the ML imprisoning the FL and ultimately causing her death due to his selfishness and still make him the ml. This was probably the reason I kept reading.

I really thought there was not going to be a reasonable reason and so I was patiently waiting to ruthlessly slap a 1* for the novel, however there actually was a valid justification.

SPOILERS**The ML imprisoned the FL to protect her from harm from his uncle. Due to some higher power restrictions, the ML isn't able to tell the FL why he is doing these things, such as kidnapping her. His original character design is someone deeply possessive and jealous, this forcefully influences many of his behaviours.


Also in this life, he still showed signs of possessiveness even when the control on him was removed, of course not to the degree of the previous life. In this case, it was a happy ending seeing that the FL agreed to be with the ml, but makes you wonder what he would do if the FL didn't agree?

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CN_Cyanide rated it
January 6, 2021
Status: Completed
All the comments that don't wish Lu Zhen as ML or talk about how they don't understand our FL forgiving him just didn't finish reading the story. To everyone planning to start, stick til' the end, and them come with your own opinions about whether or not he deserves a second chance.

... more>>

The story is told by an unreliable narrator, the FL. She has very strong memories of her last moments of her last life. And in the beginning she describes her very problematic circunstances in a way that you believe her relationship with Lu Zhen was something horrible from the beginning.

To a point you even wish for other people to be the ML. And if you check it out, we are just as outsiders as her brother was. He didn't understand the circunstances and was very prejudiced towards Lu Zhen like most readers are in the beginning.


Of course, he is confirmed as ML in the beginning of the story

in the segment where she is playing billiards in a school match, and the author mentions that in the future he would get creative over some billiard table... if you got the meaning *wink wink*


About the ML, and his reasons


Probably there is another post with the spoiler, but here it goes: The System was not the FL's originally, but the ML's. And just like she has many resctrictions on what she can change and how she can act, in his first life he was also obligated to follow a plot. And so, his cruel attitude was something dictated by the plot and also some psychological damages he received from the revelations behind his mother's madness and his father's death.



There was never a FL for Lu Zhen, he decided to give up his life when she died. :P


Therefore. Read.

Its funny, sad, sweet and also a great read.

And yes, the FL is a bit of a Mary Sue, but that is often the case in system-plots. <<less
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JinVodka rated it
October 30, 2020
Status: c11
I'm sorry but I drop this cause the ML is tr*sh. Don't know why lot of people like the ML and forgive him for imprisoning and probably r*ping the FL in their past lives that she literally dies from depression and exhuastion.

No excuse can made this ML redeemable for me. I was hoping she will have revenge and find a new love. But this was disappointing.
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September 13, 2020
Status: Completed

Tbh, the writing is kinda mediocre, but the plot is there. I always feel like dropping it, but I know, I gotta hang in there. Especially when the author try to hint on something regarding the ML. If the author didn't mention earlier why there's a sudden change in his personality, I don't think i'll complete reading this novel.

The beginning of the story is kinda bland, except for the part where the FL curses ML. Other than that, FL basically... more>> just studies. If you want romance, you gotta persist till the end, just like me and you'll taste the sweetness.

Some things that I like is how the author mentioned that everyone has their own roles in this novel. Just like a novel (or a game), every character has their own settings, their world is just like that. So that's why all the canon fodders behave like that. What an annoying bunch lol but it kinda saves them from being labeled as too shallow since they're 'programmed' to be like that. You basically can't blame them.

Though I might as well mentioned that some things are just... Weird and nonsensical. I don't understand why FL's parents who are so hung up on their status didn't teach her village daughter ethics, learning, fashion and so on. As a person who values face the most, how can they not want their daughter to be ladylike or at least decent-looking for their wealthy circle? I never understand this point. Except for the part where they mentioned earlier when if FL fails her first exam, they ask her to take remedial classes. That's it! Just that one time. I don't know if I missed something because I was mtl-ing, or the author just doesn't want to elaborate more, but that kinda makes it weird... At least to me (i guess).

Well, in my conclusion, the story is okay, a bit boring during the first half, but kinda exciting towards the later half. Like I said above, if you want to see the romance part, read till the end! You wont find the fluff; if I remember correctly, until 50+ chapters. So hang on buddies!

And I just gotta say, SONG ZHAOLIN MA BOI IS SO PRECIOUS <<less
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FIROZE rated it
September 4, 2020
Status: --
I read the mtl version and this novel is just hilarious.

I like how FL is evil while keeping her obedient, nerd and poker face of hers.

ML is like hey I wanna be hero or pay attention to me I'm handsome and FL keep destroying his moment😂😂
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Tutubitter rated it
April 13, 2021
Status: Completed
I noticed that the lower ratings were from reviews who hadn't

finished reading the novel.

Most of which are discontent that FL would still end up with ML. But if you finished the story, and really read it, not skimming/scanning through it

... more>> (cause I noticed theres still some reviews who couldn't completely understand it??) you would understand why they still end up together and it's actually very moving I admire them both for their perseverance.

Overall, the story is very funny and moving. It's also my first time knowing this kind of system which is a great plus for me. FL in the first life was the typical damsel in distress and clueless on the hows and whys but FL in this life is very witty and headstrong. Her antics with her golden finger and her cinnamon roll fake son Lin Lin was very funny.

Which were honestly the reason why I kept on reading even though I

hated the ML in the first half, probably everyone did, and the story seemed cliche.

But it's definitely a must read. All why the f***s and how the f***s are explained in the story but if you need some spoilers to encourage to keep on reading;

Why the ML is "yandare" and why their first life was so;


Unfortunately in their first life, the villain hid too well and ML is too helpless and clueless how to ensure FL's safety.

Moreover, theres also the plot restrictions and power which is basically the main reason for their whole misunderstanding. Refer to FL's gold finger;

    • Can change a word/sentence/paragraph in the story as long as it doesn't kill the characters.
    • Said change will be implemented inexplicably.

In a sense, thats also what happened to ML in the first life. There was no one with the power to edit the plot therefore they had to follow the dictated storyline. They were not even aware that their world is a book. Thats why this big misunderstanding happened even though ML wanted to explain himself to FL; it's because he can't.

To summarise; the ML is also a victim and is really pitiful because he had to shoulder everything by himself. "Everything" because he was also very very very vaguely aware of the "hidden power" that hinders him from explaining everything to FL but hopeless against it cause he doesn't even understand it nor can he uncover it.


So, for me the ML is only possessive in the normal way you would feel possessive of your lover.


He even also had internal crisis when he got enlightened. And he let FL go on with her studies and career peacefully without hindering even if he got a bit neglected.


Those who would fight me for this are those who hadn't finished the story :P <<less
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efenzach91 rated it
October 28, 2020
Status: c60
Don't get cheated. If u like mushy shoujo style this was good. Not much for logic. First of all, male lead abused the protagonist physical & mental until she died (I think by suicide). Logically protagonist should have hated the dude and people around him but no, she can keep being friends with male lead best friend and tell him many things while the friends supposed to be described as big mouth and gossip man. Maybe protagonist too sue to hate male lead. For someone who died cursing to kill... more>> male lead, she somehow don't want male lead's psycho uncle to abuse her enemy, maybe coz male lead didn't abuse her enough or maybe she masochist tsundere, I don't know. The few first chapter very good n can see how she tried to abuse the male lead but then author think everything need humor n the abuse started to be described as love story. Well, as long as male lead is sue n handsome, r*pe is considered romantic. I also doesn't see why she keep other males away while she knows she should have shield to fight male lead. And after male lead suspicious of her super power, even asked her directly, she still being ignorant, using the power everywhere and s*upid scene. Well too genius, to face-slap everyone without anybody noticing weird occurrence. Then after chapter 50+ there's surprisingly no exposure from script about rebirth of male lead, while the script usually even describe monologue inside character heart. Plot hole everywhere starting there. Author might bit lazy after some time I guess😂.

This novel good to be described as masochist tsundere protagonist who rebirthed and forgive villains abuse and love conquer alll, I mean face conquer all... it's typical F4 tyrant love story where all abuse is just misunderstanding and can be forgiven. Well handsome people doesn't r*pe, they romantic sad*st because too much love... kekeke <<less
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mao.garette rated it
November 1, 2020
Status: Completed
It has very few translated chapters at the moment, but I couldn't help myself from MTL-ing it (since the chinese novel had already reached its end) ! The story is just that good! Even though it has broken grammar (since I just translated it with google) it's still hilarious. Also, it might come across as a shallow and repeated "girl comes back to the past to prevent her death" kind of story (and the academics part of the story might be boring for others), it's rlly not just that so... more>> give it a chance. It's a bit darker than u expect. I even shed a few tears at the climax. The redemption parts of the novel was simply the best. Don't hesitate to read, I even made a NovelUpdates account just to rate this story a five star! Don't worry if you read other comments saying it's tr*sh. No, every character has a reason for their actions, it's not just because they're good-looking/main characters so their past deeds were forgiven. The FL has her reason for the way she thinks, the ML had his reasons for the way he acted, u just have to read the story to understand and sympathize with both of them. And no, FL has the best character because she has a very realistic kind of thinking that ur typical leads in these types of novels rarely possess. Also, for the people saying that FL is such a mary sue, it's just common sense, she's a character in a brain-dead yandere novel, THAT'S THE POINT OF THE STORY, the reason why she tried so hard to battle against her power as the white moonlight (first love) of the ML to divert from the original plot 🙄 Hesitating to read because of the comments saying "ML r*ped FL" "FL is such a masochist for forgiving him" "tr*sh character development" "tr*sh FL" ? Don't worry, these are all not true. If u want to make sure, read the spoiler tab I've written but if u wish not to be spoiled and is planning to read this story, then take my word and go ahead and read the novel NOW!

I've seen another comment saying the male lead is tr*sh since he manipulated and locked the FL up with him in the past life. While I do agree that ML was a paranoid possessive man at that timeline, it's because everything that he owned, everything he loved was either coveted or killed by his uncle. That night when he kidnapped FL, it is because she was being planned to be kidnapped, r*ped, and tortured by his uncle (because his uncle wants to take control of him and also, uncle was attracted to FL). The reason why the ML turned the way he was was because his uncle broke him, especially at the part where his uncle told him the reason why ML's mother has become mentally ill was because he (uncle) manipulated and used his mom to his heart's content. The ML didn't know what else to do but to kidnap FL and run far away with her, but he didn't tell her that reason due to trauma so FL just thought that he was out of his mind and became stressed at his very possessive actions to the point where she had died in anger (literally). It was never said that she was bullied and sullied by ML during the time they were together, they even joined meals, she was given education by him overseas, was taught martial arts by ML to protect herself, and was even said that she willingly makes him coffee and meals during his work hours. The only problem from their last life was miscommunication. If only ML told her about her situation to the outside world, she wouldn't be suffocated with his overly-doting and protective love he has for her. Also, did I mention that the reason why his thinking was f*cked up was because the author of the book literally made him think and act like a yandere? Once he knew that he was just in fact a character in the book that was made to have a f*cked up personality, he tried going against the character written for him. He also repented, felt guilty, and beat himself up even though it was not exactly his will to act that way, but the author's. That's just how much of a darling he is. And for the people saying that she forgived him easily in her second life (the life where she goes back in time to prevent the ML from falling for her), she did not? She literally doesn't develop feelings for him until he LITERALLY DIES just to save her from his uncles scheming (this part happens at the last 15 chapters of the story). Only then did she start to see him in a good light AND ONLY IN A GOOD LIGHT, not even in a romantic sense yet. At the end of the story you could see that she wished that she'd live happily ever after with the person she loves. She didn't exactly wish for a happy life with ML himself. That's how much she's a tuff woman and wouldn't depend on one man for happiness, so shame to the people who undermines her character and simply refer her as a "simp for the ML who would forgive just because ML's hot" 🙄🙄 anyways go ahead and read it, but I doubt u will after reading this spoiler anyway LMAO but I hope u enjoy it as much as I did 😊💕]

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Sheddy rated it
July 21, 2021
Status: c66
I followed the other reviewers' advice and tried to stick through the end but nope, I couldn't stand it anymore.. The ML didn't change all that much, still the same yandere guy, his yandere behaviour and inner thoughts are truly disgusting for me, the only difference is that the FL didn't reject him like before and became more of a tsundere, and the ML basically just keeps his yandere tendencies hidden because he knows that she will despise him permanently if he act like in his past life. Reading it... more>> makes it feel like an accident waiting to happen. I wish she could find some other guy or girl instead, but alas, scum ML will always win! <<less
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lynngao228 rated it
September 6, 2020
Status: Completed
I read the MTL version and I really enjoyed it!

I'm glad all the misunderstandings were resolved and I liked how there was pretty significant character growth in the MC and ml. I like how the author showed both the mc's and the ml's side of the story, so we can understand both of their perspectives.

This allows the reader to understand the mc's decisions, and why things change when MC finds out the truth.


There's many hilarious shenanigans and I really like how the MC is able to cleverly use what she has to her advantage. This is a very good romance (+ comedy) novel if you are looking for an engaging but relatively light read.
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May 13, 2021
Status: c35 part3
I don't know how to feel about this novel. I also don't really understand why many people like ML? In their past life ML basically abuse, imprison and r*pe FL for such a long time. No matter whether there was so kind of misunderstanding, it doesn't erase the abuse FL suffer by ML hands.

Now FL get a second chance to relive her life, but the ML is still the same abuser from her previous life. And, we are supposed to root for the ML?

In this new life FL have to... more>> see and confront ML (her abuser) almost every day. Imagine how you feel facing that situation. The novel portray their interaction as cute/hilarious, but all I see a woman who tries her best to confront her abuser. I just feel sad for her.

It would be better if FL get new ML at least. Praying for FL. <<less
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Raizel_Pendragon rated it
January 22, 2022
Status: c61 part4

The ML is the OrgML! I should've read the reviews instead of just looking at the star ratings.

The summary and first few chapters made me expect a calm and funny yet vengeful woman who'd slowly work towards and bring forth the ML's downfall with her hardwork and cheat ability. But what did I get? A Mary Sue fairest and prettiest of em all FL who can easily attribute all her past life's sufferings to 'plot', magically forget her hatred and GET TOGETHER with her Ex- Jailer+Rapist... more>> +Murderer lover (ML) in the span of some 5 chapters. Bish what??? You literally died from the depression [ (possibly via suicide) ] because you can no longer bear what he's doing to you!!

I can understand leaving past life's sufferings in past life. Forgive and Forget. Live and Let Live etcetc~ but I'm hella tired with this: "It's all the plot's fault! Now that I'm reborn my trauma is gooooone~" & "I'm sure everything's going to be fine cause he's a sad rich boi with hot bod who regrets it. Oh he even cried once so I love him again now~"

No excuse can make me accept this ML (and his audacious inner thoughts of how he's still got a chance cause it's fate/she's his) or how easily they got together after all the BIG reveals. I was hoping she will get her revenge or atleast find a new love and start afresh. But this was just so so disappointing.

Moreover, after the initial few instances I found the way she used her ability to fvck with the ML a bit redundant dumb and petty. Also

it seems like the high analytical power and memory she acquired via the system can only work during math exams/competitions. Otherwise how can anyone not guess that the ML might be reborn too after his 'strange' and changed behaviour even hearing her systems notification of high energy fluctuations twice immediately prior to these changes occurring. The system even informed her that it's linked to the ML (-‸ლ)

And ofcourse she's ONLY interested in studies and NOT interested in any of the other decent dudes around her AND will NEVER date anyone... Until and Unless it's that fvcker ML who's stalking pursuing her. Hahahaha ಠ◡ಠ


I'm also a bit tired of all these novels portraying adopted children as greedy, selfish and twisted and end up with a forsaken miserable end. While the parents who mistreated/abandoned the MC, treated them with blatant partiality and sowed the seeds of discord more often than not gets away scot free.

The translation is good so it's an easy read. Not my cup of tea, Won't Recommend it. Personally would rate it 2.25⭐. But as made obvious from other reviews/ratings, tastes vary. If this is your jam, have at it fam! <<less
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Lalali rated it
June 1, 2021
Status: --
The overall story was 💯💯💯 and all mystery has been explain briefly in the novel. There are a lot of CN novel with many plothole but this novel was quite different and detailed and its not boring.
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AngryattheAuthor rated it
March 3, 2021
Status: Completed
It was an okay read, no ups no downs no emotional trauma or mental dog blood abuse.

The plot is simple and straightforward, everything is resolved and lose ends are tied.

I have a feeling some readers were confused about why the ML is the ML despite what he supposedly did in his previous life.

Read spoiler if you're not planning to read the story but interested in what happened.

... more>>

However from what I could make out from the raws MC was the one who owed ML a lot.

The leads experienced 3 lifetimes together, the current plot time-line is in their third life.

During the first life which MC, ML and MC's brother remembers, therefore thought ML as an as*hole who was practically a bastard that deserved to die.

However it all turned out it was everything was a misunderstanding and it was because ML was trying to protect MC from ML's uncle (who's the villain of the story.)

Due to the lack of communication between MC and ML, the hatred was carried through to the second life and third life.

This part was confusing but I think MC rebirth into someone else in the 1st life time and went and took revenge on ML (but the novel classed this as their 2nd life together so am confused.)

Anyways from what I could tell she was trying to take revenge on ML but gave up and left him which completely broke him down because he either fell in love with her or took her a replacement for the dead MC.

So in theory although she was the ML's little moonlight flower she was also/maybe the heroine of the novel because the System said that the heroine was the MC's replacement.

Okay now thinking about it this entire 1st and 2nd rebirth probably happened during one time line and the 3rd life is the official reincarnation (2nd rebirth) of the MC and ML because the world collapsed cos the ML broke down after MC left him twice.

Now that's outta the way, during the current time line MC and MC's brother only remembered the 1st life therefore they hated the ML.

Can't remember when (I think when the ML confesses to the MC, ML began to dream about fragments of his previous life, it got to the point that he remembered the 1st and 2nd life (same time line I think) and somehow concluded that MC had rebirth and tried to kill him in the 2nd life... Bloody confusing.

Sh*t happened, everything got revealed and MC found out that she had misunderstood the ML... Used her golden finger here and there and finally changed her ending.


All in all I'd rate the plot as a B, don't think there are any plot holes... I'd be shocked if they were considering how simple the plot was.

Comedy was gold, just the pace and plot itself felt monotone.


Love how MC was alway making trouble for ML, I think some people didn't like how she was ruthless trying to kill ML when she made his car go outta control but remember this was the guy she probably suffered a lot of mental abuse from (although it was a misunderstanding) but MC knew it was impossible to get the script to kill the ML so maybe that's why her means are a lot worse than it should be.

I think she's trying to inflict the same amounts of pain ML had given her... Well that and she just wanted to kill him.


The best part was probably the side characters that were so cute, especially Little Song son.

If I was to sum this story up I'd say it's like reading a Buddhist Scripture.

It would've been a better story if MC didn't have her golden finger but then again if she didn't the comedy wouldn't have been so good.

There's no character growth btw... Just saying.

Oh nearly forgot about the villain... He was tackled so casually I nearly spat out a mouthful of blood.

Also for dogsh*t bloody drama, reader spleen abuse, face slapping or excitement we don't welcome them here at the temple, please kneel on the mat and pray to Buddha. <<less
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ISBNthinkingaboutyou rated it
November 6, 2020
Status: Completed
Love this novel! The concept is both cliche yet fresh at the same time. The pacing of the romance between the FL and ML is good, and the author is so good at writing funny scenes where Chu Yin changes some part of the plot. It gets kinda repetitive near the end, but it's still super funny.


If you don't like the male lead in the beginning, stick through it to the end! It's worth it.

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Lykalee rated it
September 13, 2020
Status: Completed

pacing was perfect, storyline does not feel rushed or lacking, it has the perfect comedic moments and appropriate serious events. Characterization is done well. I am honestly surprised. I'm very happy to discover this gem.


What she experienced during the college entrance exam was true! I remember the time when I took a professional licensure exam. Same feelings and so it's really realistic.



That uncle of his deserves his fate!

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June 24, 2021
Status: --
I tell you guys to read the whole novel for those having an opinion on ML.

I mean seriously what it is shown and initial character design of ML I feel he really is pitiful.

When ML tries so hard and can't do anything about it. He feels so helpless when the MC doesnt look at him as a person but a character and he can't even do anything about it.

... more>> Well he isn't particular nice, I mean look at his character design. Speaks DANGER

Frankly the plot point is interesting. What's more interesting is that there is no justification or reason and everything falls into place at the time of big reveal. <<less
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Footprints of cats
Footprints of cats rated it
September 9, 2021
Status: --
Disappointed with ML's past actions, I hope this garbage will be discarded and the MC will find new love.
If you remove the ML role from LJ, you'll find that this is a huge piece of junk. The presenter was imprisoned, forced the MC so severely to the death of the MC, and in my eyes the MC is the Stockholm Syndrome.
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Neleothesze rated it
September 3, 2021
Status: c50
Solid comedy with dramatic interludes. The ML's painful past is unveiled more slowly than the FL's, so it's easier to root for her (even when she's being vicious with script adjustments) but the ML will gradually win you over (or at least redeem himself).

Aside from a few paragraphs that were skipped during editing, it's a top quality translation. 5/5 ⭐
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darkelf01 rated it
December 31, 2020
Status: c43
This is my usual dilemma with C-Novels. I love, love, love the first and middle parts of this novel but the storytelling (always) falls short near the ending. It was an engaging and fun story, I found myself snickering every few sentences, and even the side characters doesn't suck for once.

At chapter 43, I'm already tired of reading about paranoid CN female leads who won't listen to the other side of the story. Or couples who would've been happy if They. Would. Just. Talk. To. Each. Other. I do know... more>> that the background problem is complicated and the FL did suffered under the ML's hands (as usual with C-Novels) but it's something that can be solved if they'd just put the cards on the table and talk. I often pulled my hair reading this novel, and even though the novel is good, I neither have the habit nor the patience to read about frustrating relationships.

I only continued reading for MA BOI SONG ZHAOLIN SO PRECIOUS <<less
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