Ah, tragedies. I traditionally avoid anything with a whiff of a sad ending, since I've always been the optimistic type who feeds off of happy endings to survive.

But I can only applaud Cold Sands as the embodiment of the perfect tragedy. Where two people's differences are finally irreconcilable. Where an unhappy ending is logical, even inevitable. Where a proud and determined human refuses to bend, and in the end can only break.

1) Story

Han Xin is an idle young nobleman pressed into the military by his corrupt nation, despite dreaming of nothing other than living a free life. He ends up captured by the enemy, where he remains proud and unbroken despite his seemingly lazy nature. This gains him the admiration, trust, and eventually affection of the ruthless ambitious enemy prince Murong Yu. Out of their mutual love, Murong Yu lets him go to live that free life. Yet at this seemingly happy ending, a revelation shatters everything Han Xin knew about himself, and he is dragged into the clutches of destiny's unceasing machinations.

(Re) reading Cold Sands is a uniquely bittersweet experience. The beginning of the story is an archetypal example of my beloved "enemies-to-lovers" dynamic. The bickering s*xual tension between Han Xin and Murong Yu is so much fun to read, especially with the hilarious levels of crude swearing coming from Han Xin's free-spirited mouth.

Then at the halfway point of the novel, the story takes a drastic turn into serious court drama and politics, as Han Xin's personality is warped and changed like steel forged in the fire.

Finally, yes, the two main characters of Cold Sands do meet what can only be called a truly unhappy fate. The ending was absolutely flawless in that it even had the tiny glimmer of hope just to add to that depressing realism~

This is the essence of a perfect tragedy: if Han Xin and Murong Yu had the chance to do everything over, they still wouldn't have changed a thing.

2) Characters

Our main character Han Xin is absolutely the star of this novel. It's both really fascinating and really depressing to see him evolve from a carefree, lazy, and hilariously mouthy/sarcastic youth... into a cold and ruthless emperor who must personally take the responsibility of an entire nation on his shoulders.

On one hand, he gains a sense of purpose and the ability to make a hugely positive difference in the lives of countless people. But at what cost, at what terrible cost?

In the end, he has lost everything--his friends, his freedom, his love, his very self.

On the other hand, the main love interest Murong Yu is wonderfully written as Han Xin's exact counterpart. Where Han Xin grows to deny his own humanity, Murong Yu develops in the opposite direction. He starts off as an inhuman conquering prince, but grows to acknowledge his own humanity through his love for Han Xin despite knowing how it will become his glaring weakness. Still, in the end, he cannot abandon his ambition and thirst for power, and it costs him his last chance to be truly together with Han Xin.

Besides these two amazing main characters, the side characters of Cold Sands also fit the story extremely well. Every single one represents and develops the themes of the main story: Han Xin's childhood friends that he must cut ties with, the crueler subordinate generals below Murong Yu, the corrupt old order of Han Xin's nation that he must root out... Special shout-outs to the love rival of the story, the wonderfully written Heng Ziyu.

3) Overall

All in all, I have pretty much no complaints about Cold Sands whatsoever. It's just that I don't want to reread it since seeing how happy Han Xin and Murong Yu used to be makes my heart hurt too much.

I can only hope that in their next life, Han Xin and Murong Yu can live free of all these burdens and worries, and finally be happy together.

I'll leave you all with this poem, which I think captures the bittersweet ending of Cold Sands perfectly.

Rima XLI by Gustavo Adolfo Bécquer (Rough translation)

You were the hurricane, and I the tall tower which challenged its power: You had to either smash me or knock me down!

It could not be!

You were the ocean, and I the firm stone which awaited your waves: You had to break upon me or tear me down!

It could not be!

You beautiful, and I proud: accustomed one to crush, the other not to yield; The path narrows, the inevitable impact...

It could not be!

[Side Note: The translation of this novel is on the more liberal side. It reads very smoothly in English, but there are anachronistic changes here and there.]

I cried so much. Truly a bittersweet romance. If you like happy endings then don't read this, for it it's a gut renching romance that shows the pain and bitterness of love. It has happy times and is light and refreshing at points, well written and draws the reader in. The ending is magnificent and couldn't have ended better, even if it was truly sad. The story gives the reader a feeling of hope throughout the narrative, like it could work and they can be happy, I truly recommend this novel, for though sad, it is fulfilling.

I have finished reading yesterday, but I still have lingering feelings about the story. this story is alive, too realistic, and it could never be better. but, for my sake... since I can't get the feeling out of my heart... I shall share my feelings here.

i really hope there's a sequel.. maybe in the modern days, they were reincarnated... han xin shall raised by adopted family, when he had finished school he works at the palace, acting as an emperor for tourists. there he met with yu and a deja vu suddenly came.

yu on the other hand is the future heir of a talent agency, famous for bringing up actors. he himself is a famous actor. so he got han xin to work at his agency.

their love blossoms when they both re enact the story from their previous live... who could play it better then the REAL emperors themselves? they changed the script on the whim during the act, but the director finds the changes interesting thus he kept it.

before the drama ends, han xin got kidnapped only to find out that he is the heir of rival talent agency company. but the fact that he is he heir is closed from public thus he don't have the way and chance to explain to yu.

after months separated away from each other, they finally meet again during a show, it's a show where the guests were important people from any organizations. this time they invite the ceo of two big talent agencies to talk about their achievements. that time, they were the youngest ceo in history, that is also the reason they both were invited to the show. with no where to run, han xin faced yu with complicated feelings.

after the show ended, yu suggest to have a drinking party with people from the other company, han xin got no way to escape. in the middle, yu forced han xin to follow him to the hotel room upstairs... (use your imagination)

well, for the rest of the story, I still feel the need to insert xiao qingyue as well but the ending this time around wont be too tragic... I believe most will be happy if they were to get together in the end.

finally, my heart feels a bit lighter.. LOL

"Their blood finally merged into one."

Han Xin leave earlier than Murong Yu but he left him with longing memories. I wonder how Yu cope up with his sorrow after knowing his lover passed away.