The ML (Emperor) meets the MC (Blind Concubine), who resides with his servant and cat, and plays with the little prince, by chance, one day. The romance develops (up to chapter 17/18 ?), and all is well... for a while. But then, General Qi Sheng (a side character ML) comes by to whisk him away from the palace, to a faraway place, under the orders of the Empress Dowager. He brings MC to a side character MC's place (Jue Yu, who gets together with Qi Sheng) We get 2 chapters of peacefulness. Then Emperor comes storming in to bring the blind concubine back. The blind concubine, under the fear of the Empress Dowager and "not wanting to ruin the relationship between mother and child", begs to stay (outside the palace), and says it was all his idea to leave the palace with Qi Sheng.

The Emperor misunderstands this (because Qi Sheng was also like, 'it was my idea! Don't blame the blind concubine!' when interrogated, and thinks they were having an affair. He's pissed, takes MC back (who along the way keeps pleading, which only pisses off the Emperor more), throws him in the prison. Under the impression that the Emperor doesn't like MC anymore, a Court Official (idk who) has the guards dump 10 pails of ice-cold water on the MC. The Emperor didn't plan to see him at first, but under the little prince's convincing (if you don't see him now, you might lose him forever, ie. MC might die!) he goes. He discovers what the guards had been doing to the MC, and brings the MC into his arms and to the living quarters, where he gets the doctors to try and heal him up. But, of course, MC cannot stand the cold, and the ice-cold pails of water make him very very very ill/near death. From then on, the MC is disillusioned. He doesn't know that the Emperor misunderstood him and General Qi Sheng, only that the Emperor let the guards do the water punishment.

sh*t gets worse, and shortly after getting a little better, the Empress Dowager tries to poison him with Osmanthus cake, which he almost eats except his cat steals the bite and dies. This sort of... breaks him.

Now mind you, there's the matter of the MC's blindness, which was caused, Woah! by the Emperor... sort of. Turns out in the past, the MC's father was a doctor and him being a loved son, followed his father along, as his father, a famous (?) doctor, had been called to look at the former Emperor, who is dreadfully ill. The MC, as his father looks at the former Emperor, wandered off, playing in the snow, till he chanced upon an open door (or something like that), and saw the not-yet-Emperor changing the post-death edict (presumably to make himself Emperor, or some other political thing), which is punishable by the death of nine generations of his family (which means his mom, Empress Dowager, will be killed, as well as the rest of the family) if caught. The MC doesn't know what is going on before he's grabbed and dragged into the room. Of course, he doesn't know who is who and is totally clueless. Unfortunately, the Empress Dowager instigates the (her son) not-yet-Emperor to blind the MC. The not-yet-Emperor, in a moment of panic, and without considering that the MC is only an innocent child who does not deserve it, gives the order, and hot charcoal is put onto MC's eyes, blinding him. The MC was then cast into the Cold Palace (or something similar) to waste away.

Now back to present times, the MC (assumedly) found out that the ML (Emperor) was the one who ordered his blinding way back then, if we read between the lines of his weird behaviour somewhere during chapter 15-17. Anyways, it's later confirmed that he pretty much knew all along, except for in the beginning. But he had no hatred in his heart, which was obvious given how he and the Emperor pranced around.

Unfortunately, after the punishment in the prison, and then the subsequent death of his cat due to poisoning from the Empress Dowager (he loved his cat a lot. He found it five years prior present time, frozen, and picked it up to nurse back to health. His cat was one of his lifelines), he starts a downward spiral. (Also, the little prince was almost killed, too, by the poisoning) All his love for the Emperor gradually turns into hatred (which isn't helped by the fact that the Emperor pretty much doesn't even come to see him when he's sick), and by the end of it, everyone is hurt and no one wins. The Emperor, probably 2-3 chapters before the end discovers the truth of things (b/w Qi Sheng and the MC, or at least I assume he does?) and goes to coax the MC. It is at this time he learns that it is he who caused MC's blindness (Jue Yu, who was begged to help MC's ill health, tells him).

However, too many horrible things happened to the MC in too short an amount of time (grave illness, poisoning of his cat at the hand of the ML's mother, near-death of the little prince) and he cracks. He's broken thoroughly. Also, the Emperor tries to send his servant away. MC begs for him back and gets the servant back (albeit reluctantly), and later forces the servant (doesn't tell the servant) out of the palace (with Jue Yu and Qi Sheng, who was removed from his post after the whole escape debacle). It is during that time that the Emperor, after realizing the truth (I think he did, at least, or he just softened up anyways) and regretting his actions, in both present time and the past, treats the MC like a treasure. But, like mentioned, it's too late. The MC is no longer willing to forgive him for what he'd done (both present and past), even though he'd once been willing (even after learning at some point it was the ML--he didn't know at first--was the Emperor (and put two and two together) who blinded him). The leniency in him is gone, and he's just broken. No matter what the Emperor does, he doesn't cave. The love in his heart is gone, and the Emperor realizes that, that the MC now hates him. The MC slowly wastes away, and the Emperor seeing this, finally acquiesces to the MC's desire to leave the palace. So the MC is lead out from the palace to a new residence 'outside' the palace, and he starts to get better. Except he's not really out of the palace. He's been moved to a pavilion far away from where he used to live, still within palace grounds (I think?), and under that guise, the Emperor continues to watch him from afar. MC, of course, doesn't know this. Without the companionship of his cat, or his servant, he whiles away alone. And bam, it is at the very end, the readers realize, that while he 'hates' the Emperor, perhaps, he doesn't hate him that much at all, anymore.

See this passage:

"He soundlessly reclined on the soft divan. He suddenly felt that his surroundings were excessively quiet.

His eyes were unable to see, reclined in this place and reclined in the yard at the Cold Palace, actually didn't have much difference.

At that time, Yu Li was cuddling in his arms, once in a while would swing her tail. Xiao Bao would run about to splash the water, doing chores, feeding the two birds which hanged on the eaves.

But now, there wasn't a single sound anymore.

He was already unable to distinguish, was he actually still alive or already dead. He was already broken up into pieces.

At first, it was only his eyes that unable to see, now, his heart also had become a blank space.

Previously, there was someone who would secretly look at him attentively from quite a distant, despite he would never be able to see forever.

But now, that person would never look at him anymore.

Didn't matter if that person's heart was sincere or not. He didn't want it.

Because he wanted to leave the Palace badly, from the very start, he had prepared to give up everything.

Sometimes he would also feel pain.

From the bottom of his heart raised a kind of sharp pain like being gnawed.

When he felt that kind of pain, his body would tremble greatly. He would curl his body into a circular form while his face was covered with tears.

But only at that time, his heart would be at ease.

He could only be certain.

He was alive."

Note:

"Previously, there was someone who would secretly look at him attentively from quite a distant, despite he would never be able to see forever.

But now, that person would never look at him anymore.

Didn't matter if that person's heart was sincere or not. He didn't want it.

Because he wanted to leave the Palace badly, from the very start, he had prepared to give up everything.

Sometimes he would also feel pain.

From the bottom of his heart raised a kind of sharp pain like being gnawed."

I interpreted this as, he wants to love the Emperor, but he also wants to get out of the palace that has caused him so much torment. However, now that he's 'outside', he realizes the Emperor will never watch over him again. He refuses to accept his feelings on this, as 'he'd prepared to give up everything', which I assumed to be, he was prepared to give up the Emperor's love, if only to be free. But even then, now, he feels pain, knowing that he'll never see the Emperor again.

And that's the worst part. He's not truly out of the palace, and the Emperor continues to watch him, if only from afar. But he doesn't know that, and he can't know that, because then he'd also know that he was still in the palace, and that he never truly escaped. So the Emperor can't tell him, thinking that the MC never wants to see him again, despite the fact that the MC is actually desperate for companionship. But hey, tragedy tag, people!

Damn, Ch. 19 was the game-changer. If the misunderstanding had been cleared up (b/w MC and Qi Sheng, with the Emperor), then the possibility that the Bad Ending wouldn't have happened is high. On one hand, you'd think--you'd hope for the Emperor to know better, to know how much MC loves him and all that, but mind you they'd never confessed to each other, at least not on the MC's part. This, and how he'd disappeared so suddenly, and the pleading he gave when 'caught', only served to deeper drive the misunderstanding in. Of course, the Emperor wouldn't suspect his mother, as his mother had now 'withdrawn from politics'. If only they'd communicated better. All the MC had to do is say 'Empress Dowager is after my life', or something along those lines--yet at the same time the Emperor doesn't know that the MC was the kid he blinded 7 years ago. The MC knows the Emperor doesn't know, and he doesn't want to ruin the relationship b/w the Emperor and his mother, so he stubbornly stays silent (because he's SO kind-hearted, you know?) But then again most misunderstandings are like that--simple to fix with words, yet never resolved.

Otherwise, the MC didn't hate the Emperor for blinding him in the past, but hated him due to the stacking of present events. The hurt that was caused to those close to him, and especially the death of the cat--who mind you, was one of his lifelines--is what fully flourished his hatred.

If Ch. 19 had gone differently, then everything probably would've gone differently. The worst part, is that the breakage caused from the events then on were never fully healed. The MC had become unable to forgive, and when he was finally willing, it was too late because the other continued to think he was unwilling. The ML had wanted forgiveness, and in being unable to get it, decided that the least he could do is give the MC what he wanted--yet months after it was finally given, he did not know that deep inside the MC had started to forgive.

Everything first starts going down hill during the first, and thankfully only, god awful s*x scene of the novel where the protagonist describes the horrors being done to his lower body as being akin to the most traumatic event in his life, having his eyeballs seared with coal. Through out this intimate moment the blind concubine is in immerserable pain all because the jackass of an emperor couldn't be arsed to, idk, go slower when his supposed lover is literally bleeding out in front of him. There's absolutely no mention of lube, which did exist back then just look up carrageenan, or even ye ole trusty (not really but it at least would have shown some sort of effort from the emperor) saliva as an alternative. Worse of all this leaves the blind concubine incapacitated for a few days since the brute just went ham on him despite the fact you're told multiple times through out the story that the concubine is frail and has a weak constitution. At first I thought 'ok that was pretty bad but this novel is old and china still isn't well known for it's s*xual education especially surroundinh homosexuals'. But then it just kept getting worse and worse.

The emperor's selfishness in bed isn't just a one off 'oops I'm inexperienced sorry' personality trait. His selfishness and, again, childishness acts as a toxin infecting almost every plot point after this. My extremely well established and loyal general for some reason relocated my controversial lover whom I paraded around in front of everyone? Better not think about who I left in charge of matters regarding my palace or who would have the power to erase a persons identity. Instead I'll just beat him before selling him as a s*ave. I'm the reason why the blind concubine has neither sight nor a family anymore and I was directly there when all of this happened years ago? Well how was I suppose to remember mutilating a boy and destroying his prominent family! He's being too petty and should forgive me for something so trivial that happened so long ago! The blind concubine just lost his beloved pet and is only happy around the two kids he treasures? How could he be so mean to me!? I'd better send away that pest he loves so much since it's not fair he gets the concubines love! It's a never ending string of s*upidity and cruelty on the emperors part and yet the book never writes it as if we're suppose to think "what a douche". Instead the author wants us to think "what a complicated situation", but all I can see is an arrogant man child who never learned to treat others like people and still needs his mommy (whom he never confronts for trying to kill the man he supposedly 'loves' along with his little brother) to look after him. This is best exmplified in the ending where, instead of respecting the blind concubine's request to be free, he instead tricks him into thinking he's been given a remote home outside of the palace when in reality he's just been relocated to a secluded corner of the palace. The emperor then resigns himself to having to watch him from afar as the lie would be exposed if he ever approached him again. The blind concubine by the end is effectively a prized fish trapped in a fish tank while the emperor is his owner who can only stare at him within said tank. If the emperor had cared enough he could have even planted a few servants to act as 'neighbors', but no. The emperor does not want to see that person smile at anyone other than himself and would rather he wallows in isolation because the emperor is selfish.

(Side note: The fact he couldn't remember what he had done to the blind concubine either implies he's, once again, dumb or he has a tendancy of extreme violence when he doesn't get his way. His disregard for the general despite us being told of his huge achievements and dedication to the crown also points towards this along with his thoughts of wishing to kill the blind concubine when the concubine was obviously suffering from the loss of his cat and would not talk to him. Also can I just say searing his eyes makes no sense at all. You don't want him to TALK about what he saw so why would you not CUT OUT HIS TONGUE?????)

Honestly, I don't like these kind of stories.. I hate sad or tragic endings!!!!!! Especially in BL!!!!!!

What the hell!!!

Especially, this one..

He's blind.. His cat died.. He had to force his little servant away from him.. He had to spend the his life alone.. And the emperor.,.. T-T

I seriously feel like this author is the type who wants to watch the world BURN..

But this is reality..

If it was me, I wouldn't know how to forgive the person who caused me to lose everything in the past and now.. So I kind of understand why the author ended it that way..

But still.. It hurts my heart.. T-T

I'm going to read more fluffy BL after this one.. T-T

blinded the MC, r*ped him and injured him, took advantage of the fact that MC was blind to make him live a life worse than death for the rest of his entire life

spend the rest of his life alone, unable to see anybody or even hear the sounds of living people because he was living utterly alone. Shame on the ML, he cares nothing about the MC. The ending makes me cry so much cuz the MC is in constant physical and mental pain for the rest of his life while that piece of maggot sh*t ML looks at him from afar in his free time as if MC is his pet canary. The only way this could be a happy ending is if somebody managed to stab the ML a few hundred times and then elope with the MC to live a calm and carefree life. The MC is a darling who deserves all the love in this world.

But in the end, MC can only live alone with the false notion of being far away from the emperor. The MC is tired and no longer wants to be a plaything of the emperor but the ML, who is apparently in love with the MC, still doesn't respect his wishes and basically punishes the MC for wanting to escape from the place that destroyed his life. This man (ML) isn't a human.

I also think it's interesting that if ML never revealed he knew the truth, perhaps MC would also pretend it didn't happen. He's buried the past events for so many years, with no hatred; even when ML reappears, MC doesn't like him but it's still not quite hate. However, ML revealing he knows is like ripping open the scars so they bleed and hurt all over again...

The only thing that makes me sad is MC is all alone at the end, without even xiao bao... ai, it was much better for him to have lived in the Cold Palace without the Emperor's love.

I cried hard for the MC, something I hadn't done in a while. The author was, as simple and as genuine as my brain can put it, "so good." they slowly unraveled the pains of our MC and when the full truth came out, it's like they tore the bandaid off a still-fresh wound. I felt how the MC lost himself from that day. I felt how his heart grew space solely for resentment and turned into a void full of hatred. I felt how he saw his whole life stripped away from him, the people who would know him by his name, the people whom he'd see when they'd smile, laugh, or cry—all gone. When the MC showed hints of being terrified of the emperor. I already knew he had something to do with everything. Excellent foreshadowing, subtle but it does the job of hinting at us about what's to come. I never felt bad about the MC fearing the emperor before I knew the truth, not because "oh he's the emperor, it's natural for him to be feared" but because the mc's fear wasn't normal and obviously exposed that he had a terrible experience relating to him. The fact that the emperor couldn't pick up on this was already hinting at his personality. When you grow older, you can tell the difference between someone being dramatic versus someone whose words of pain contain meaning. I could tell the mc's words were the latter.

sigh. We find the truth behind everything later on. Jy conveniently explains the entirety to us, or to the emperor, rather. From the beginning, the emperor showed a kind, gentle, and indulgent demeanor to our MC. Before all this, they appeared to be so peaceful, the typical picture of a noble who was fawning over the flower he discovered atop a mountain, seemingly only for him to find. Thankfully, I wasn't naive enough to think this was true. I never forgot how the MC reacted towards the emperor. His behavior in regards to this topic quickly revealed to me that it's not easy for him to fall in love, or that he possibly has no more room for feelings besides the ones he already had at present.

i have no way to segue into this so i'll just say it outright and put it bluntly: the emperor is unreasonable. Truly, he is deserving of the role. He is overbearing, with a poor temper and only the desire to possess, possess, possess. He merely acted chivalrous because he was attracted to the MC. He was still the emperor at the end of the day. He wouldn't mind if our dear MC is blind for as long as that keeps him by his side forever. Even if the MC hates him, he would entrap him within his sights. He is mad because of the way the MC treats him. What does this grown man and tyrannical ruler expect? He was the one to have blinded him and watched on as the MC shrieked in pain and forever lost his sight and himself. He had made him bleed on their first time in bed, still going as he continued to bleed. He had lost his temper at him and imprisoned him when his own mother had sent the MC away and the MC could only secretly take the blame. He didn't question him one bit. He sees only his own idealized and romanticized version of the MC. Had he truly loved him, he would've been able to tell that something was wrong when he left. Had he truly loved him, he would have left him alone. Had he truly loved him, he would have been gentler that night and treated him better. He does not love the MC, he merely wants him the same way he had wanted the throne and he grabbed the throne by any means. Look, how else did things get to this point?

i understand why the ending may frustrate people. Our MC never gets the freedom he truly desires. He was deceived into believing he was rid of his captor who had made him suffer since seven years ago. Alas. He was just fooled into being put into a glass container where the ML could watch him from time to time, for his own selfish "love." I thought I would find myself angered by how things turned out. I wanted an MC who would actually express anger at his situation, an MC who would finally stand up for himself and have the self-respect to go. This was not what I wanted, but I respect the way things turned out. Our MC was doomed from the start, the moment he stepped foot into the palace. The ML was never meant to have him. He didn't deserve him. No matter what he did, he took away the mc's life. No amount of reparation can make up for that. I'm only glad that he was willing to let the MC go at least to this extent, but I despise him all the same. I did not love the ending and I didn't think it was right, but I could only accept that things are the way they are, the same way the MC has to and the same way the ML has to. My only complaint is that there's a sliver of sympathy meant to be evoked in the scene of ML watching the MC from afar. He was a monster. If he pines, he pines. What "gaze lovingly from afar"? He brought this all on himself. He took away everything from the MC because of his selfishness and unwillingness to be punished for his crime. He thinks that because he "loves" the MC, the MC has to forgive him. I hope he rots in hell and is never to be reborn, and I hope the MC has a good and peaceful life in his next one. There is no justification for what he did. In this tragedy, he has no place to be pitied. I won't say anything about how unjust everything was for the MC and how wronged he was, but I will at least be mad about this supposed sympathy for the ml. He doesn't deserve it, alright? He was the cause of all this. Author, even if he is your child, you can't make us feel bad for him. He has to face the consequences of his actions, yet he doesn't even get retribution for what he's done! A broken "love" is the smallest thing against this guy, if it can even be counted as love, really.