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If You Are a Dodder Flower
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Web Novel (CN)
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Rating(3.7 / 5.0, 335 votes)
5    42% (141 votes)
4    19% (65 votes)
3    16% (53 votes)
2    8% (28 votes)
1    14% (48 votes)
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2017
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79 Chapters (Completed)
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Completely Translated
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Release Frequency
Every 100.1 Day(s)
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[Graph]
Weekly Rank: #9377
Monthly Rank: #7633
All Time Rank: #1013
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On 3528 Reading Lists
Monthly Rank: #799
All Time Rank: #2328

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In her previous life, she tried her best, she struggled. In the end, she has lost to her own mediocrity.

In this life, she resigned to her fate.

After her mother passed away, Xia Rou reincarnated as an orphan and she got taken in by her mother’s lover. Once again she stepped into Cao family, and once again she had to confront the people she loved and hated…

She dares not to expect anything, only except that she won’t suffer any more in this life…

Associated Names
One entry per line
如果你是菟丝花
Related Series
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Recommendations
Rebirth of an Abandoned Woman (2)
Rebirth on the Doors to the Civil Affairs Bureau (2)
Chongfei Manual (2)
Every Vicious Woman Needs a Loyal Man (1)
Trial Marriage Husband: Need to Work Hard (1)
You Look Like You’re Made of Money (1)
Recommendation Lists
  1. Novels I would re-read
  2. My favorite Chinese novels
  3. Novels i would take to my grave#2
  4. I search for more long novels
  5. Books that I've read and loved

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Write a Review
117 Reviews sorted by


zestylemon
zestylemon rated it
March 21, 2020
Status: Completed
i meant to give it 3 stars... curse the fat fingers

the story itself was fine... it was engaging and riveting enough that I read the MTL to finish it. there was variation such that it didn’t get boring.

but why 3?

... more>> the themes... no thank you.

1. chauvinism: quite heavy on this — the whole premise of the story is a woman who has to rely on others to live well (in the very name itself)

2. weird in*est vibes: I mean they’re not blood related... but they treat each other as siblings.... listen and I personally don’t mind it.... but in this case I have HUGE QUALMS because....

3. pedo vibes: the MC is 15 when they meet... and the ML is almost 30.... listen i’m not even near 30 but if I met someone who was 15 I don’t think i’d ever be able to think about them in a romantic sense even after they grew up (to the ripe old age of 18).... and there’s always an ambiguous air even when she’s young...............

i have a high squick tolerance and all this alone wouldn’t be that bad (at least he only made a move when she was 18 I guess)

but together with

4. POWER IMBALANCE : listen to me the adoption PLUS past life makes MC a very vulnerable person. she suffered in her past life and the person who saved her was the ML fostering some weird worship dependency thing going on... plus she’s basically an adopted child who has to rely on the goodwill of the family to live. that’s not a great situation for her. and I genuinely can’t feel that the relationship is a well balanced and healthy one. I mean
Spoiler

SHE ENDS UP HAVING A FREAKING MENTAL BREAKDOWN which was just GLOSSED OVER

[collapse]
so.... no I don’t think I can support this relationship.

5. I feel that she could have been so much happier with the second ML instead and she seemed to genuinely like him as well (although she did only approach him bc of her past life). but the ML couldn’t accept that she was going to “leave” him and just acted upon his lust. I was so hoping that she would come to her senses and realise that she would have been good with him.

don’t get me wrong I love a good yandere obsessive story (but FICTION ONLY PLS) but this was just way to squicky for me like it reeks of grooming and an unhealthy relationship (but I guess typical though at least in my other stories they weren’t dependent on the yandere until trapped) I guess what makes this worse is just the fact that she trusted him so so much and he basically took that and used it.

but given that I enjoyed the story until like chapter 70 it gets a 3. <<less
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newcumber
newcumber rated it
March 19, 2019
Status: c16 part2
Sooooo cute and fluffy. Well written, and well translated. Can't wait to see where it goes next. I keep wanting more updates!
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tenshineko
tenshineko rated it
December 31, 2023
Status: Completed
Overall I liked this story, though I wasn't quite happy with the ending. It feels very rushed, and I wonder if the author ended it earlier than planned. I also felt a bonus chapter about what happened after her death in the original timeline would have been nice.

It's interesting to read the comments and see what other people got out of this. Clearly a lot of people felt like her second life was being a door mat and view Cao Yang as a pe*ophile. I think it's more complex than... more>> that, which is why it was interesting. Her regression changes everything - how she sees people, and more importantly, how they see her. Her perspective as a (mental) adult is much more mature, and she has taken a step back to see more clearly the pivotal moments of her original life and recognize how her (understandable) original actions resulted in (understandable) reactions from those around her. Yes, it makes sense for her to be upset and rebellious when she first came to their home, but it also makes sense that they judged her on how she behaved.

Spoiler

I liked that when she meets Cao An again and reflects on his entanglement with his boyfriend, she realizes that in the OG life she was too close to him and gave him a pass for his shitty behavior. Now she feels she has emotional distance and can judge the situation more objectively and try to correct the bad outcome. It's also obvious to the reader that somewhere around here is where OG Cao Yang liked her and was likely going to make a move. IMO, this is what shows he's not actually a groomer or pe*ophile - in the OG life he liked her later, but in this life she is mentally close to his age and so behaves thus. She immediately tries to have a good relationship with him, interacts with him in a way that someone of her age normally wouldn't, and depends on and listens to him because she knows (from first life) how reliable he is. I think it's important to keep in mind the mental ages of reborn characters because part of what naturally keeps adults from liking children is the difference in maturity levels and life experience. In OG life, despite liking her, he supported all the choices she made even when he disagreed, and never revealed his feelings for her. She was engaged to a scumbag and he helped her (I so wish I could see what happened after she died. I imagine his wrath was pretty devastating). Each of the brothers is a bit different toward her in this life, in a positive way. I did not expect the Costco bear to appear in a C-novel 🤣

[collapse]

I think it's unlikely that anyone that regresses would make the exact same decisions that did previously. That would be an indication that you had no growth in the years past that age - even decisions that turned out ok can be better with more knowledge. This novel covered some areas that I think other regression stories miss - for example
Spoiler

her realization of how completely different certain people behaved knowing she was connected to the Caos vs not. So she had no idea how downright scumbag and lecherous the Hu family was until she encountered Hu Xuan in this life. He was so kind and polite when he knew her before because of the proper intro by the Caos, but when they met as students, he straight up assaulted her until CY came to correct his impression that she was unprotected. Even as "friends" he tells her that in his home she wouldn't last a week without either him, his brother, his dad, or even his grandfather "eating her up." 🤢 It was a reminder that you only see one aspect of a person, but they have other faces. She even says later that he is essentially not a good person but because of her family he has no choice but to put on a mask of a good person in front of her. Ugly but realistic.

[collapse]

There is a lot of discussion over her being described as "obedient" and "docile." TBH I think some of this is a concept that can't be encompassed by simple translation, that it is rather cultural. So it sounds offensive to western audiences, as if she has no will of her own. There is truth to CY being a dominant, bossy personality - it even mentions early on that he does prefer obedience (this is common in military types because that is how the military operates). To be fair, if faced with a person that listens to you vs a person that rebels, it is naturally easier to like the one that is listening. I took her to not have blind obedience, but to be reasonable and receptive to advice. In turn, I don't think they really tell her to do things she wouldn't want to do. It's kind of like... if my dad lets me do whatever I want, if I voice a desire he makes sure I get it, supports me in my endeavors, BUT if he tells me to do something, I'd likely listen to him. Because otherwise he doesn't interfere with my life, so it's something important. Is that lacking independence or freedom? Some might say so, but I think that's pretty normal. Readers seem to have idealized views of human interactions, but I don't see how it stands up to real life. Yes, you want people to be able to make decisions, but if you see your loved ones making bad decisions, do you try to stop them, or allow them complete freedom? I think the reality is that no one is completely making free choices because we have human entanglements that constrain us in ways, even if that isn't obvious. We make the best decisions for our circumstance, which generally means taking other people into consideration.

The ending needed a lot more time for relationships to develop properly. I think the author was going for her finally resolving the dissonance between lives and coming back stronger and having made a clear choice, but it wasn't pulled off well. I'd still give it a 3.5. I don't really recommend if you are sensitive about sexism and can't get past that aspect. <<less
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Minismorris
Minismorris rated it
December 27, 2023
Status: Completed
This was actually in my "worth the re-read" list, and I started doing It yesterday, and It was all good until the parte where the FL's mom and ML's dad meet. I really Hope It was me skipping those chapters the first time.

... more>>
Spoiler

The accidente happens when she is Seven, the mother 30, and then he says "she is only 9 years older than my eldest son

[collapse]

When there are age gaps, the most importante think is about when they meet, and they are 14-28, thats more than 10 years of difference, he literally doubles her age. And that, its called grooming. And its not romantic, nor cute, nor nothing more than a sick person's thinking.

Mind you, if It was in the XIX century, like Emma, I could bring myself not to care, because: 1. In that time age gaps at that age were pretty common, even the usual. 2. You don't get to know the age gap that early nor the exact ages of the leads, at least not that directly as This.

Im deleting This from my re-read list and hoping none of you read It, because the romance happens when she is 16. And he is 29. And I wish I could change the rating I gave this book previously. <<less
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08phamann
08phamann
July 23, 2023
Status: Completed
Rather than being an adopted daughter of the family, MC is more like a pet. She is acknowledged as a member of the family in this life only because she becomes obedient and follows everything they say. She ingraines herself to their preferences, which is why they have good feelings towards her. All of this is based on her obedience. Her uncle and eldest brother are the biggest chauvinists. The uncle liked the MCs mother because she was pretty but couldn't do anything without a man. ML rejects an attractive... more>> and powerful match with a potential partner because she is actually just as proud as him, and will not be an obedient and dutiful wife. Vomit. When ML forces himself on MC and causes her to have a mental breakdown, I was disgusted. What a pig. She saw him as a brother and he goes, fck that, and proceeds to ignore the fact that she had a boyfriend and declared his love for her and expects her to reciprocate. I actually enjoyed this novel until the end when the brother became a love interest. <<less
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Mairuchan21
Mairuchan21 rated it
June 23, 2023
Status: Completed
This is good novel.

I was planning to skip it after all the bad reviews I saw but I decided to read a few chapters and then decide. I am thankful that I tried it.

I agree that words like obedient are used too many times in the story but I didn't like how other reviewrs are saying this is misogynistic and all. Do you even know the meaning of misogynist? Where were any of the character prejudiced against woman.

If a new person comes in your family and dosen't follow the rules... more>> of your home I would also like to know how much will you tolerate that person. MC was such person in her last life and she acknowledged that. It was not that she had a backbone but she wasn't thankful towards anyone in her last life and she is compensating about that in this life. And it is not that she just listens to others and don't have any opinion of her own but she now knows how to express them and the cao family always listen to her.

It also shows the psychological effects a situation like rebirth can cause to a person. For our MC, ML was like a god whom she did not think had any faults both in her last and present life but once that perception was destroyed the lines between last and present life started to blur for MC. This shows that rebirth is not all about revenge and seeking happiness. It can also leave a deep imprint on ones mind.

The ending was pretty rushed. It could have been elaborated but I think overall it was a good novel. <<less
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epexegetic
epexegetic rated it
November 27, 2022
Status: Completed
I respect the author, so I hesitate to speculate too much on their intentions. On the face of it, this is a rebirth horror story. In her first life, Xia Rou was taken into the house of her mother's wealthy lover after her passing. She's grieving, uneasy, rebellious, and unable to fit in, and ends up having a BE with a soft-rice-phoenix lover, and su*cides. Scarred by this, in her rebirth she suppresses all emotion and is timid and obedient to the point of being obsequious. Her new adoptive eldest... more>> brother treats her like a creepy groomer dad until she reaches the ripe age of 16 or so when he can be honest with himself about how h**ny he is for this child. Oh, her waist is so small... After grooming her for so many years, her decade-older brother finally cuts off all other options for her and coerces her into becoming his lover, even after she develops a disassociation disorder on account of being preyed upon by someone she considered a brother in both lifetimes.

Like... this is bad, right. I've read the author's other works, so I feel it must be deliberate. If so... good job? This story was so horrifying I'm writing this review at least two years since I read the work. On the other hand, this is a really long story that dwells on the details and spends more time than a parody should. The author also has a certain predilection for age-gaps and small waists that seems authentic. On the other, I find it hard to comprehend that the author of 攻略不下来的男人 has illusions as to the value of these creepy predators with the mask of handsome male leads.

I don't know if I can recommend this story, even as I approach it as a horror, because it hasn't convinced me of that intention and it scares me that it might be serious. It's a well-written work by an author I admire, but on balance I don't think reading it will enhance your life. It's been years and I'm still muttering 'what the f*ck?'. <<less
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SKZrule
SKZrule
November 20, 2022
Status: Completed
It's really well written. I loved the storyline, the characters, her relationships with her brothers but... the ending felt rushed as heckkkk.

... more>>
Spoiler

Like... the ending and 'romance' between Xia Rou and Cao Yang was like 10 ch 😭😭😭 I felt it coming around ch 35 tho. I didn't want to give up on it because it was so good and sweet.

[collapse]

It could be considered as controversial with some of the views but tbh idc, just consider it as a weak female lead. Your choice to read it or not.

Spoiler

The ending was a big fat bummer tho. It could have been such a great novel had the author elaborated more. Idk...i think the storyline was thought out well but probably not the ending. It was just so unrealistic 😭😭😭

[collapse]

All in all, it was a good read if you don't take what I said in the spoilers into consideration. <<less
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gerryberry
gerryberry
October 22, 2022
Status: Completed
This is a five star read if you read it from the perspective that it's a slow-build psychological horror novel about a deeply traumatised character. I finished it in two days and have yet to stop thinking about it. I wish I knew the author's intention when they wrote this. Based on another novel they wrote which I read and enjoyed, the author is fully capable of writing a kick-ass, take no sh*t kind of reborn FL.

In the end, I found this to be a very compelling subversion of rebirth... more>> novels that really messed with my expectations as I read it. <<less
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Lazygoddess
Lazygoddess rated it
April 17, 2022
Status: Completed
I have mixed feeling about this story, I quite enjoyed it at the beginning it had all the right twist and turn, and then at the end it took a dive into a dump and then added a vague HE to hide the complete bullsh*t that happened, I was dumbfounded, and still are given that I'm writing this review two years or three after reading it.
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Kai14
Kai14 rated it
January 7, 2022
Status: c34 part2
It's my first time writing a review but I had to.

I dislike this so much. I forced myself to continue but I felt like this was gonna get worst. I read to feel great and not the contrary. So I can't read till the end.

I told myself not to read the reviews because they tend to influence my view on a novel (I kind of regret it). So I started reading this with an open mind.

So I'll list what made me drop this :

Spoiler
    • The age gap. So I felt like the author was talking a bit too much about this big brother 14 years older than the MC. And I already felt like this would be hard for me to read. I was sure they'd end up together. I don't know why there are a ton of Chinese novels with such huge age gaps. But I can bear with it, when it's less than 10 years. In this one, it's too close to pe*ophilia, even if MC is 25 yo mentally. I think they are probably gonna be together after she is an adult. However it's clear that Big Bro already has ideas about her when she is still a kid.
    • Sexism. When the author talked about the mom, the information dump in the beginning, I felt like it was so useless and annoying. The mom is obedient, white necked woman, WHO CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT A MAN. What the heck? But whatever. So when MC said she didn't want to be like her mom, I was like "Yes girl! Show them!". However, the only thing that I remember from her, is that she is obedient, white necked girl. Did I say that she is obedient? And the men are described like the typical men in I don't even remember which era. Father and big bro are so alike that if MC ends up with him, won't it just be "mother's story the comeback". They don't let guys like plushies. Why would you beat a kid for that?
    • The MC's character. Well, by now we know that she is obedient. But does she have to be dumd on top? And although, I think that she is not bright, it has nothing to do with the author shoving regularly that "she is not really good in her studies, but at least she admits it". Yeah so what? One time is enough, do you have to say it that many times? She is always described like "she is not that good but since she admits it, she is not so bad". That's said by father, big bro
      and author pretty often. She idolize her brother and sees him as family so I don't know how she is gonna end up with him but it'll probably be unbearable for me to read. When Hu Xuan warns her about the fact that she should be careful they are not blood related, she is like "No he won't do nothing to me, he wasn't like that in my past life". Really girl? Everything is changing around you in this life so why would he be the same? She is so obedient that her brother is shaping her to be like is type. The heck?! Girl, if you wanna cut your hair, Do it! If you wanna mourn for you mother's death, Do it! You really wanna live your life like a flower on the side of the road? What is interesting about that?!
[collapse]

I can't continue, she seemed more interesting when she actually had a character.

Also, Chinese novels have something with overly strong MLs who are merciless and have a strong s*x drive which is really annoying.

At least I didn't witness r*pe or drug or drunk interc**rse, not that I know if it'll happen later.
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IMHEREFORTHEDRAMA
IMHEREFORTHEDRAMA rated it
October 3, 2021
Status: Completed
im rating this based on my personal ruined morals 😭

first things first, ... more>>
Spoiler

the male lead was the eldest brother but not biologically but still he is waaaaaaaay older than our FL (not really) since she time travelled I dunno but she came back to the past so her mental age was doubled already

[collapse]

i dont really have anything against the ML since she pampers our FL reaaaally well, and my broken morals couldn’t care less about how
Spoiler

he’s been viewed by our FL as her older brother,

[collapse]
, what really bothers me and making my heart ache was the boyfriend the FL had, he’s not lagging towards the male lead’s pamperings, for real!!

when I finished reading this, I think there’s a hole in my heart. I like the ML, but I also like the second ML so much I wished she end up with both of them 🙂

hehe, over all, disregarding my twisted taste, this novel was well written and well translated. Just don’t let the complex relationship of the ML and the FL get to you, after all, this was all, a product of fiction. <<less
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hpae
hpae
July 27, 2021
Status: Completed
Very well done! Great translation quality. Realistic emotional and intelligent development of characters. No ridiculous super power, cruel villains, or bad revenge/face slapping. Hope the translator can take on more projects.
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Makarla
Makarla rated it
July 19, 2021
Status: Completed
Honestly, I'm having a second thought of reading this because of the low reviews and tr*shy comments. But then again, I reread the synopsis, then paired up with other good reviews, and I was like... why not? After all, rebirth is one of the genre I'm fond of. And good thing I read this one. It took me almost a day to finish it. This one is actually a good story. I love the story flow and how it ends up. Personally, I think the author was on a haste... more>> ending it abruptly. She can definitely do better ways on how to end up the story. Still the end is quite good. Chapter 73 feels like should be just the halfway of the entire story where conflict happens and whatnots. There are still a lot of questions for the other characters and Wei Qi deserves at least better romance. This can be expanded more... still I like what the author did. One more thing, I'm eager to see a glimpse of events after the MC died. I badly want to know what the Cao family do, did they avenge her or what? I can understand why others are not satisfied on this kind of story but the author want it to write this way and we need to respect her for that. If you don't like it so be it. No need to be mean. This story actually has a lot of potential. Only if the author added more events, more sweet real romance and not brotherly love get together with the ML and MC, more experience for the MC, and those warm and fresh and all pure love if possible for Wei Qi. Anyways, all in all, I love the writer's work. This is a good story and it please me to read. Kuddos to the writer. Thumbs up for this. <<less
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Lulu2003
Lulu2003 rated it
July 1, 2021
Status: --
This novel ist Just a tr*sh!!!

at the beginning I like it alot and it was a 5-start novel for me.

But the author ruind everything...

... more>> I mean I'm not against the relationship between siblings who are not related by blood. I've read other novels where the ML and FL are siblings and love each other and I liked this novels alot.

BUT in this novel I couldn't accept that the Brother becomes the ML... I mean they already had a very beautiful and strong siblings relationship and they were Just like real siblings!

But the auther decides to ruin everything and makes the nice and protective older Brother becomes the ML!WHY?!

So because of that I wanted to give this novel 0 stars but I couldn't I'll give IT the 1 star <<less
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briannacommoname
briannacommoname
April 15, 2021
Status: c20
Guys read the novel until 20 or smth you will get the idea if its your cup of tea BUT

I hated the ML from the get go.

... more>>
Spoiler

Like we are 1ch in and I knew I am gonna hate this character and I was soooo shocked when he turned out to be the ML. I wasn't expecting that I love MLs like xie xing (from military lineage the classic's) when I suddenly see these pedo's who like obedient and sh*t FL's I was fking surprised

[collapse]

I just wanted to strangle him to death from the first time he landed his eyes on MC and what he thought about it. ISTG. <<less
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KatLyn97
KatLyn97 rated it
January 1, 2021
Status: c12
Wow I'm still in this chapter but I already learned quite a bit. I learned how petty I was. I learned my inferiority towards others. I learned how to interact best with others. I even learned that if others were being mean to you, you need not be mean to them too. Also, I learned the best way to learn, familiarize the theory in your own pace instead of cramming for knowledge.

Among other learnings, these were the things that stood out. Wow. This novel is great.
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michimichi01
michimichi01
November 22, 2020
Status: Completed
The story is just... WOW!!!At first I thought it going to be boring. Really! This one is very well written! The plot, characters, intensity... just.. wow!

No dragging in the storyline and there is no over written so called face slapping either!

The romance suddenly take a drastic intense line toward the ending, but it was just well placed as well. Although the ending came suddenly, I cant think a better ending for this story. So the ML loves her in the past life also.. so there no better ending really.
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ronaruto
ronaruto rated it
November 13, 2020
Status: c79
it had become dark and twisted towards the end. I liked that part where ... more>>
Spoiler

he truly regretted his actions and finally conceded to whatever she wanted. If she wanted to stay with Wei Qi and just be a big brother like he used to be then all is well as long as she regains her past self.

BUT IT WAS FORKING TOO LATE BITS!!

ughh I wanted him to drown in remorse for the rest of his forking life he forked up her life gosh darn it but he got away with it and still ended up marrying her gahhhhh he was so much better as a yandere brother ahhh im so mad!!

[collapse]
<<less
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erena44
erena44 rated it
September 25, 2020
Status: Completed
So cute!!! I absolutely love the interactions between the FL and the ML's family. The only downside to this story was that the ending seemed rushed. I would have liked to see romantic interactions between the FL and ML since they only got together at the very end. It would have been nice to also know more about the supporting characters since their stories sort of seemed to disappear such as the ML's youngest sibling's love problem. I was also kind of rooting for the second ML since he was... more>> so in love with the FL. Their interactions were so sweet. However, this didn't deter me from loving how the story progressed. <<less
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