I Don’t Want This White Moonlight Anymore!

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The first time Zhao Yinqing set eyes on Sun Lu, she’d immediately fallen hopelessly in love, and had been dead set on loving him for 12 years.

But this love was one-sided.

Without even so much as a glance at her, Sun Lu loyally stuck to his white moonlight (first love). Finally, at the age of 26, Zhao Yinqing fell down a flight of stairs. As her soul began to dissipate, she watched wide-eyed as Sun Lu smashed her own grave like a lunatic.

He actually hated her to this point! She thought to herself: If I could live again, at the moment I first see you, someone please make me blind!

Then, heaven opened its eyes and brought her back to the time when it had all begun. Meeting with Sun Lu once again, Zhao Yinqing told him, “Sun Lu, can you stay away from me?”

Sun Lu: “Sure!”

Afterwards, listening to his mother, Sun Lu started living in the Zhao family home.

“Zhao Yinqing, I’m injured, won’t you console me?”
“Zhao Yinqing, it’s been so many years, won’t you look at me?”
“Zhao Yinqing, would it kill you to like me, just for a while?”

Associated Names
One entry per line
I Don't Want This First Love Anymore
这个白月光我不要了
Related Series
N/A
Recommendations
I Became The Stepmother of My Ex-husband (1)
I’ll Be the Male Leads Sister-in-Law (1)
Legend of Concubine’s Daughter Minglan (1)
Pampered Consort’s Acting Awards (1)
The Yandere Came During the Night (1)
Recommendation Lists
  1. I Have Read A Gem # 6
  2. Favourite Yandere BG(cn)
  3. Rebirth: manifest a better life this time
  4. modern school life, female mc
  5. BG - Let's Not Meet in this Life! (Second Chances)

Latest Release

Date Group Release
04/28/24 Universal Novel c13
03/03/24 Universal Novel c12 part1
02/21/24 Universal Novel c12
02/14/24 Universal Novel c11 part2
02/07/24 Universal Novel c11 part1
01/21/24 Universal Novel c10 part2
01/11/24 Universal Novel c10 part1
01/06/24 Universal Novel c9 part2
12/28/23 Universal Novel c9 part1
12/21/23 Universal Novel c8 part3
12/13/23 Universal Novel c8 part2
12/05/23 Universal Novel c8 part1
12/25/20 Stitchie Translators c7 part2
12/25/20 Stitchie Translators c7 part1
12/24/20 Stitchie Translators c6 part2
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6 Reviews sorted by


seemanta
seemanta rated it
October 8, 2021
Status: Completed
WHY DID NOBODY WARN ME ABOUT THE ANGST?!!! I mean, I knew there was gonna be ML-abuse from the introduction. I started it cause I like them but this was a bit too pitiful.

The novel starts with MC dying. Then she goes back to before she met ML. A common trope. But the difference here than other novels are the characters and their emotional development. You can also see how tsunderes irl are just hurtful a*sholes. I absolutely loved it. The abuse was f*cking ✨BEAUTIFUL✨~

[Lots of spoilers down there↓]

... more>> MC;

MC loved ML for more than 10 years. She chased him with everything she's got. She was childish at first, acted obnoxious and hurt the ML. But she slowly lost her confidence after numerous rejections and got more low-key and mature. But the ML was always very rude and hurtful to her. After exhausting her love for him, she finally decided to just give up and start a new life. But she suddenly died in an accident and everyone thought it was a su*cide cause of rejection. Later she saw him smashing her grave and she reincarnated. After that she decided to just ignore ML in this life. I thought it'd be like other FLs, ignoring him but getting his attention for that and finally getting together again. But nope. Before dying, she really actually gave up on ML. It also didn't happen in a day. In some minor flashbacks, we can see her gradually coming to accept it. In this life, she was feeling very emotional, hurt, sad and angry when she first met him. But she continued to ignore him and only had minimal contact with him. But her dad started pursuing ML's mom and they came to live at her house. Then after slowing getting along with him (still with minimal contact), she started treating him as a fellow classmate. They still didn't have a very good relationship.
Spoiler

Then ML kinda gave some hint and FL rejected him. Still no good feelings. She was just surprised and shocked, maybe a bit sad for her past self. She already liked her 1st bf then (Yep, MC had 2 bfs before ML).

[collapse]

Then in college, they just had one-sided and kinda forced close relationship from the ML cause MC was still keeping her distance. She still didn't like him. ML was just not a significant part of her life to her. This was the first 6 years. Then things happened... and she went abroad for the next 6 years.

Spoiler

She and her bf broke up. They dated for 3 years. And she got into a big dispute with ML. He was already a jerk before but was starting to become a psycho too back then.

[collapse]

In abroad, she got more mature and let go of the past, but still not planning on dating ML.

Spoiler

She got herself the 2nd bf. They dated for 2 or 3 years ig. Broke up just before coming back to china.

[collapse]

She finally got together with ML months after coming back to china. Few important things happened before she decided to get together. But she still didn't like him much then. Even till the end, she couldn't love ML as much as he loved her. But hey, they have a long life ahead so it's ok!

ML:

ML has extremely low EQ. His human communication skills are a mess. He obviously loved MC in the past life but he always overthought random stuffs MC said, refused to acknowledge his feelings and acted like like a rude jerk. Well actually, he was a s*upid jerk. He couldn't trust MC even after 10 years, liked hogging her attention by saying crap, was too ashamed and embarrassed to ever admit his feelings though he knew that he liked her. He did help out her out in bad times but he just couldn't stop talking tr*sh. Then MC died and he lost it. In the next life, ML noticed MC cause he overheard her tr*sh-talking about him. Then he later moved into her house, got to know about her more and somehow fell for her again. He wanted to be in a better relationship with her but he still continued being a tsundere, talking tr*sh everyday. But MC just kept being indifferent and increased her distance from him. (I felt a tiny bit pity here.) Eventually he kinda confessed and got rejected. (HA. HA. YESSS!!! But there was a bit of charcter development after this.) That was 3 years. Then he kept being jealous for the next 3 years too while nurturing his unrequited love. He was still acting like a temperamental rude ice god. Only difference from before confession was that he started poking his nose in caring about MC's bussiness more. (Character development ig... not sure if it's in a good way though) Unfortunately, MC only tried her best to avoid him. (Lol) Then MC went abroad while he went psycho.
Spoiler

MC leaving and cutting contact with him gave him great shock. He also started having flashbacks of MC's death. He didn't remember anything else though. He lost track of reality and dreams, even attempted self-harm and su*cide. (I genuinely felt a bit bad for him here.) He gradually got to a stable situation in those 6 years with counseling and care from his mom.

[collapse]

This period of no communication changed him a lot. He stopped being an immature jerk all the time and stopped poking his nose in MC's business. (Finally some good character development!) MC and him got less awkward. Then various things happened, MC noticed his problems, got to know stuffs and finally decided to, um, just give it a shot? Thus they got together. Then there was some couple character development events and ML started getting better.

The realistic character developments were worth it! The side characters were also given a good amount of personality. Their screentime varied but they affected the lead's lives pretty well. They were not there for show. Even some canon fodders got their own endings cause realistically speaking, people change and they don't carry grudges from high school to adult life. MC's divorced parents was nice too. They weren't one of those cliche divorced parents. She was in a good relationship with both of them and met her mom frequently. Her parents didn't forbid her from meeting each other.

My favorite supporting character here was MC's dad. He definitely wasn't one of those loving spoiling good dads. You could even say that he's irresponsible and selfish at times, but he loved and cared about his daughter. Most importantly, he had real personality. He was not just a prop for MC's backstory or her walet. <<less
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Aisha Ann
Aisha Ann rated it
June 10, 2023
Status: --
MC should have moved on from him. She just waste her second chance. He isn't worthy of her. I don't understand why MC waste her youth and time to get together with man who treated her so bad. I am sure their relationship won't last. He is so toxic and MC is too s*upid love blind..
2 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Readers123
Readers123 rated it
November 27, 2023
Status: --
I love this story like the MC is not a marry sue and all of it seem good to read like MC not a genius or something just a normal girl but I don't really like the angst and unfortunaly I really like the SML better than the ML I really don't care about ml.

And warning to every one to read it either ML and sML it kind of FL step sibling so it mau became weird.

And still either way I would always on sML side in this story ML... more>> to arrogant to FL and I really like the first part until it became messy <<less
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lucky frog
lucky frog rated it
September 13, 2022
Status: --
This novel is not among my favourites. At first, I enjoyed reading this novel, but half way through I began having doubts and after I finished reading it I can say I understand the low ratings. This novel is not for everyone. I appreciate some angst, but the ending should be equally rewarding. Not so here.

Spoilers below.

Mc's love life got messier and more complicated than I expected. I was disappointed with most of the romance developments and mc's personality. I wanted to find out how MC and ML would resolve... more>> their problems, but I felt somewhat frustrated when mc's boyfriends kept popping into the picture. When she started dating her first boyfriend, Fu Ze, I had an impression that she truly got over ml, meaning, she got only over her love, not the hurt. All her life MC felt insecure and undervalued by the people that should have been closest to her, however, she entered relationships quite easily, which made her more vulnerable and by the look of it, she got emotional scars from each of these relationships. When finally MC and ML got together, I did not feel any satisfaction. The iceberg melted somewhat because of her guilt how she treated him in this life. Otherwise, she could have moved on and had a relationship with someone else with no issues. Mc's feelings seemed opaque at that time and she did not even examined them for the longest time afterwards. She was quite cold and her priorities were seriously messed up. When ML and MC got together she did not truly accept him, but it only looked like an acquiescence to sleep with ML and nothing else. Anyways her feelings did not appear to be strong. I think that in second life, ML loved and needed her much more than she needed him. <<less
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Bookworm_Sueweetie
Bookworm_Sueweetie rated it
July 4, 2022
Status: Completed
This novel was full of angst but I can't stop bingeing it despite using MTL. I like the development and time progression and wanting more chapters. Also, some supporting characters got depth.

The perfect description of this novel was "tables were turned", the victim of unrequited love was changed.

FL
Spoiler

FL (Zhao Yinqing) got no cheat after being rebirthed so I'm glad that she's not portrayed as Mary Sue or suddenly being genius. She worked hard and studied but her improvement was realistic. Also, some maybe frustrated with FL's being cold and sometimes unfeeling but can understand her because of her past demise & sad unrequited love she felt in past life. Because of heroine halo, many secretly and openly fell in love with her but she was too guarded even when she got relationships including 2 ex bfs and ML

[collapse]
ML

Spoiler

Meanwhile, ML (Su Lun) was really jerk in past life despite liking the FL, he left her hanging and treated her bad and felt unloved.... In this life, can't help but sympathized the "current him" because he can't easily get the FL's love. He also became svicid@l when FL decided to go abroad. He also became emotionally unstable after dreaming the past life and how the FL di3d... I also think tha he was a closet Yandere but fearful of affecting his relationship with FL.

[collapse]

The con was...I just felt some questions weren't answer (like what was inside ML's utility room for?). Also I felt that leads still lacking trust with each other. Anyway, still glad that they got the happy ending they pursue.
1 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Eeria
Eeria rated it
March 18, 2023
Status: Completed
It’s a 3.5

i liked the story and the tortuous path for redemption the male lead took. I just wished the FL was more sweet. Their romance is very adult and cold like? It’s a bit sad actually. Male lead was a tsundere like character and realized too late. As for FL she did a 180 and I don’t think she became better. The add of boyfriends muddled the story a bit. It’s s not a bad story to read.
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