All My Disciples Suck!


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After four years, He Yiming finally became a Sect Master, activated the sect system, and received sign-in rewards!

The system summoned the souls of humans from Earth, reshaped their bodies, and  made them disciples of the sect!

With that, the sect’s style of operation drastically changed!

Even though they couldn’t even kill the monsters in the novice village head, they just had to do a su*cide attack to defeat it. That, and a whole lot of shenanigans as they innovate the world of cultivation!

Associated Names
One entry per line
All My Disciples Are Sand Sculptures!
Related Series
I Am the God of Games (2)
History’s Number 1 Founder (1)
Gamers of the Underworld (1)
The Boss Behind The Game (1)
Game of the World Tree (1)
Recommendation Lists
  1. My Main Novels
  2. Best of Misunderstandings
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  4. Novels I like
  5. Best Novels - No Simps, No CP

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21 Reviews sorted by

New Overbored9000
November 13, 2023
Status: c91
The book was good, sadly Webnovel just have a better translator than this, which is a shame since most problems occurred from grammatical errors and phrases that we don't understand, they broke the immersions of the novel and that made me gave up.

The novel is good, funny, and ingenious. Not sure about the others but it's the translation got me to stop.
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June 13, 2021
Status: c67
The title in a nuance, in the eyes of the MC his 'Disciples' do in fact "suck", the reason this is objectively true is that they lack numerous limits that the MC himself has.

The MC is essentially a Hardcore [1 life] player where the disciples are Softcore [unlimited lives/ restarts]. They are specially selected people {mostly Pro-Gamers} that can throw themselves at all the problems by grinding out their very lives with minimal pain, something like 5%. Many of the things they do would leave the MC crippled if not... more>> just outright dead.

I put this up cause even though most of the reviews that complained the title was "wrong" are gone, I did agree that it was not a very good introduction / representation of the story thus far.

I actually really like the VR take on the Cultivation world. It really brings life and dimension to the story pushing the 'only one path' nonsense to the cliff. It gives me the feel of a 3D open world game where there is a giant window on the ground floor of a building and you can actually open it and just jump out. <<less
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F3X rated it
December 30, 2021
Status: c320
First 40-50 chapters were great. Next 30ish chapters were okay. Then the second round of players were introduced and the story turned into a caricature of itself. I've read up 'til chapter 320 now, and the story just hasn't been good since.

The author has started wasting words to the extreme (monologues, sound effects, dialogue, explanations and descriptions are horrible) , makes constant (loooooong) unfunny anime reference jokes, recycles scenes and generally just tells an uninteresting story without properly earned progress or interesting antagonists. Every "evil" person is cartoonishly s*upid and... more>> over the top. It turned very childish.

It's too bad, because I really enjoyed the start, but it's just not a good story once it goes past the first phase.

I'd give it 2½ stars for the good start if I could, but it just does not deserve 3 with the extreme drop in quality. <<less
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Lacking Motivation
Lacking Motivation rated it
January 28, 2022
Status: c151
As of c151, we have 88 players (disciples) in the sect. Most of them are above-average players, but there are a dozen or so that are highly skilled in certain types of games. Some are skilled in Minecraft (building), some are skilled in racing games, some are guild leaders, etc. Even the disciples that aren't mentioned by name are hardcore gamers who're willing to play for 8 hours every day. This means that the disciples are rather competent individuals who're able to fight above their realm, mainly by using the... more>>

resurrection mechanic

and also by exploiting the common sense of a xianxia world.

Honestly, I didn't expect the players to be that smart based on the summary or title but I was completely mistaken. Some of the ideas are just ingenious

eating poison and suiciding into demon beasts to kill them, refining sh*t to make higher quality shit, improving cultivation techniques by making them more specialized, etc


Now for the problems:

1. Awkward terms. While the novel is readable, there are many terms that aren't edited properly or should be edited differently. Examples include using the letter "W" to represent 10, 000 and writing a number like 300W (this represents 3 million). That's just unintuitive for the average English speaker and should have been changed for ease of reading (like using "K" (1000) instead). Another example would be the phrase "hold the grass." I've seen this phrase probably a thousand times now and I still don't have a concrete idea as to what it means. I tried to google it but didn't find any meaning that would make sense, especially meanings that would make sense for a phrase that appears once every 4 sentences. I think it means "what the fu**, " but it is used in multiple instances with different contexts so it could mean something else.

2. Some things have gotten repetitive, such as the phrase "hold the grass, " and the anime references. It was kind of funny seeing it the first couple of times, but it gets repeated many dozens of times in each and every chapter so it wears off real fast.

3. The overall quality goes straight down sometime after ch 25-ish. We get many sentences that simply don't make sense and the editing is just subpar. I lowered my rating because of this, as I felt like I was reading MTL in most parts of the later chapters.

Overall, I think the comedy in the novel and the ingeniousness of the disciples in the novel warrant a rating of 4.2 stars, but if I adjust it for translation (& editing) quality it becomes a 3.5/5. I would recommend trying it out, but if you're bothered by bad grammar you might find it painful to read. <<less
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Hanada rated it
May 18, 2021
Status: c40
A good story and premise though the comedy get old fast, I just wish the humor were toned down and it took itself more seriously
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BoredMonster rated it
April 9, 2022
Status: c150
First of all, this is a very generic novel. Some parts are ingenious.

... more>>

Like refining sh*t to a higher quality


But I can't really say it's funny. (You may disagree with me on this but Gamers of the Underworld did it better).

As for the generic part? We have a love interest that the MC can't have because of status difference that the author spent 30+ chapters having the MC go, 'She was such a supportive friend', the staple of abusing the respawn etc.

Now for the cons (There are rants😅)


Where do I even begin? Why do they use, Hold the grass so much?? I have read many, many books, online and otherwise but never has a clichè cookie cutter novel made me rage scream so hard.

That phrase is used everywhere.

Hold the grass. So handsome.

Hold the grass. You can do this?

Hold the grass. You can't?

Hold the grass. Brother Yiming is so handsome.

Hold the grass. I'm being blown away. Hold the grass. I can't hold on.

Etc. And yes, sometimes it gets used twice in the same sentence.



They also call the sect leader 'brother', a term used to denote closeness and familiarity so quickly is one of the things that makes me question the MC's thought process since, while this may be a game for them, it's real life for him. So for his disciples to go from sect leader or master to brother would've been insulting, if not embarrassing. (Although this is a novel so ¯_ (ツ) _/¯ who cares I guess)



The other is the fact that he chooses a literal wasteland to establish his sect (since he says he has the system and all he needs is time), ok, that part is fine. But he's shocked when the system (scans 1 km and finds nothing i.e no people to take on as disciples so it) uses the MC as a bridge to open an interdimensional connection (hence making them players).

I mean, his system was unlocked, he just had to establish a sect to use it's sign in and other functions. And you're telling me he asked no questions? Had no hints? Didn't get any info out of the system other than establish a sect? I call bull.

He just decided that, Hey I'm gonna get unconditional support from the system (not verified) lets choose a barren land, teeming with monsters wayyyyy out of my league?

The author could've made this story a lot better, and covered tons of plot holes, by making the MC and the system work together to grow. The MC using the system to make his sect and by association, himself more powerful and the system using the MC to get upgraded. (After all, why would a system that can make literal bodies over and over again with no need of resources for upkeep or production of the bodies and their cultivation not be able to upgrade/level itself if not for a limiter placed on it?)

By making the system actively subvert it's fundamental ruling to give the MC key info indirectly, like letting him know of the maximum distance that needs to be 'empty' so as to be 'forced' to 'open a new path' would've been awesome to see.

Or at least encouraging the MC to ask questions, to seek new information through it would've been nice. Because sometimes the MC feels too passive.

The system could've totally, offhandedly told him if, for some reason, he doesn't sign in for a couple of days, he'd get compensated with a compounded reward.

This, in my opinion, would've been better than him forgetting to sign in for 3 days then going, Oh, I forgot. Good thing those sign ins are saved and I can be use 'em at any time, and then immediately getting the OP Emperor's cultivation technique or the use destiny to level up (been a while since I read, forgot the names).

It could've cut random dues ex machina so much and given the author some much needed maneuverability and the system some much needed depth about the system and it's origin.


After looking at/thinking of the last part, can't really read this story without 🙄 anymore. <<less
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Dimensionist rated it
May 10, 2021
Status: c42
The title is a bit of false advertising - his 'disciples' have saved his life and pioneered revolutionary techniques, so I dunno what 'All My Disciples Suck' is about.

Anyway, on to the story. It's nothing mind-blowing, so I won't really give it 5 stars, being another iteration of the 'gamers summoned to another world' plot, but it's a pretty decent example of a story within that range. The translation is... not great, but its understandable, which is good enough for me (but which might make this novel merit 3 stars... more>> rather than the 4 I gave). Outside of that, it is - as mentioned - a solid story in the same vein as 'Gamers of the Underworld', though the events happen more frequently and the difficulty and challenge are rather higher than what's usual for this genre.

If you like that style of story, I'd recommend this one. <<less
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OuO rated it
July 31, 2022
Status: c187
5* for story because I am a sucker for sect management, system, and player summoning novels, although the translation are borderline mtl with weird thingy here and there but it is readable on the most part. Regarding title I think it is something wrong with the translation because as far as I know sand sculpture is more like slang for foolish but funny thingy. And the hold the grass thingy you might often find in the novel probably mean wtf in eng. Sorry about my bad english and this is... more>> my first review so please dont hit me

っ╥╯﹏╰╥c <<less
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Joospinch rated it
April 20, 2021
Status: c14
Pretty good so far, nothing out of this world in terms of content, but that's to be expected a review this early sis basically meh conaidering the novel literally just took its first step.

Translation wise:

Its good no big grammatical errors that break immersion although the way the translator puts notes is a bit annoying.

... more>> MC:

Pretty generic so far, I can say the story revolves around the system rather than the MC which is always going to be him reacting to whatever quest pops out and him outsourcing it to his "disciples".

Plot/world building:

Can't comment here because nothing has been unveiled as of yet but the MC basically

has the system summon a group of people to his cultivation world as 'players' and they do quests for him and regard him as npc


Why not to read:

Well there's no reason that stands out i.e misogyny r*pe racism etc but it does feel like a story thats has nothing new to offer to the table so if you are looking for something revolutionary then don't look here <<less
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Goonmeat rated it
June 19, 2022
Status: c253
MC becomes a sect leader and can recruit disciples from his old home, Earth.
To them, its a game. To him its his life!
hold the grass?! This sh*t is hilarious!

The chapters aren't too long, the story is not hard to follow.
One of the funniest novels on this site.
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Gsichtselfmeter rated it
March 11, 2022
Status: c197
5*, a masterpiece. This is exactly how it would go when a bunch of random gamers were invited into the cultivation world. At least this is how it goes with my friends. This novel is amazingly funny and random.

Sure, it has some flaws (no girls in generation 1, fights are a bit too long, wouldn't some crazy player start masturbating in public?, the MC is bland, the plot is terrible, etc..) but the pace and the "genre smashup" is done very well. Simply said, this novel is intended to be... more>> gimmicky, so don't expect anything more than some amazingly random laughs. <<less
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dsdasfaf rated it
January 12, 2022
Status: --
The disciples do not suck.

The MC is not super hardworking like everyone says.

He reincarnated and only put effort into training due to the systems activation requirement.

... more>> Some of the things the players are doing he could have done years ago if he actually put effort into it.

Most of the time he says the player sucks is because they are not automatically good and he has to put effort in.

Also why does he make up some lie about the history of the sect when it is absolutely unnecessary and just makes him have to keep many people quiet about his lie. <<less
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Jamond Aroth
Jamond Aroth rated it
April 23, 2021
Status: c20
Based off of the first 20 chapters, this seems like the kind of story I really enjoy. It reminds me somewhat of Black Tech Internet Cafe System, which is a story I enjoyed greatly. I laughed several times while binge reading the first 20 chapters and I have high hopes for the future.

Edit: Chapter 27, as well as some of the previous chapters, have been pretty problematic. I don't know if it's a translation issue, and editing/proofreading issue, or a lack thereof. Regardless, I can't continue to give this five... more>> stars after reading chapter 27. There're multiple sentences that just don't make sense and more that are written quite poorly. Here, I'll provide an example, so judge for yourself.

1: "Even those who were strong in building a foundation could directly apply to open a sect! Establish Sect Yipin! He was like He Yiming. He still needed to visit Haotian Academy and win the chief after four years before he was qualified to establish a sect."

This first sentence in the example makes perfect sense but after that it just goes downhill. The second sentence in particular, I've seen no mention of a Yipin in the story to my knowledge prior to this. Even if I had though, I'm still not certain that sentence would make any sense.

In conclusion, I'm docking a star because I can't honestly give something of this quality five stars. <<less
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Pranefuji rated it
April 16, 2021
Status: c4
So far this is a fun premise. It's very similar to Gamers of the Underworld, but taking on a different genre (eastern cultivators as opposed to western dungeon lords). I'm expecting these cultivators to get up to some fun hijinks worth a chuckle. Feels like the author enjoys the video game Amazing Cultivation Simulator and wanted to write a story around that. Hard to say as nothing is 1 to 1, but that's my initial feeling. Looking forward to new chapters. I'm hoping it avoids the pitfalls of bigotry that... more>> plague other comedy novels (racism, sexism, h*mophobia, transphobia etc) <<less
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June 24, 2022
Status: --
One of the funniest novels I've ever had the pleasure of reading.

If you don't laugh I recommend going to see a doctor.


To the senior brothers and sisters who find the phrase "Hold the grass" annoying may this humble one recommend using the art of "Web Browser extension technique: Word Replacement" to change it into a more natural word, f*ck.
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haanhaan rated it
June 18, 2022
Status: c251
This novel is just for fun read..

If you expect the good immersive story like another novels well, don't, its just for fun, giggle and laughing.

3.5 stars..

Originally I want to put 4 stars, but the half star deduction is cause the "HOLD THE GRASS!!!" lines over and over and over and over and over and over and over.........~

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TrueGuardian32 rated it
February 1, 2022
Status: c151
Not the best, but alright. The story basically revolves around the players, however it keeps referring back to the MC and they start praising the MC and etc. That's the simplified version of it. I imagine that when it goes beyond 100 players that would change, but this is a Chinese novel, so that is unlikely.
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Mangikop rated it
December 18, 2021
Status: c121
This one is great. The players each have their expertise which they use to their advantage in the game. I'm glad that the focus was a bit more on the players than the MC.

It's funny and entertaining.
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TomAtenista rated it
April 17, 2023
Status: c468
First and foremost reminder in reading this novel: do NOT take it seriously as the novel does not take itself seriously. It’s a good take at a comedy webnovel.

I usually avoid reading novels rated this low but thank god I gave it a chance.

It’s a... uhm... special kind of genre. It’s a cultivation novel with MMORPG elements, and “kingdom”/sect building elements mixed with TONS of otaku culture references and slapstick humor.

... more>> The plot is actually interesting and the characters are entertaining.

I honestly think it’s a GREAT novel (not a perfect) and is worth the read if you can just ignore the infinite “hold the grass” lines. <<less
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Elion rated it
January 27, 2023
Status: c222
Very high potential as a story idea, however this story suffers from "it's making me money, so I can't end it very fast" syndrome.

There's too many references which aren't funny after a while, especially anime ones. And the story just gets plain boring.
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BarryKaizer rated it
April 4, 2022
Status: c190
warning extremely funny to read but you will need an iron stomach to endure a lot of scenes, the insanity of the players can not be stopped they can only increase and spread like a plague. A twisted comedy with a lot of cute scenes sprinkled in the gaps. Bare witness to the legendary Beefnoodle and his brothers and sisters on their journey to supremacy while driving all the other world inhabitants into the pits of insanitty
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