I Should Have Just Died


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There was a woman. Born as an illegitimate child and raised under the strict control of the queen, her world was as small as a well.

There was a man. He was forced to marry a woman who was his brother’s political marriage partner. His world, which was infinitely wide, became smaller.

The woman’s original sin, and the man’s resentment. “I should have just died instead…”

Associated Names
One entry per line
차라리 죽을 걸 그랬어
Related Series
There Were Times When I Wished You Were Dead (2)
Forgotten Juliet (2)
I’m a Villainess, Can I Die? (1)
Side Story (1)
Marriage and Sword (1)
1st Kiss Was Intentional (1)
Recommendation Lists
  1. straight romance and BL
  2. my novels
  3. Korean Novels
  4. Novels That Will Break You
  5. Korean Novels part 1

Latest Release

Date Group Release
05/05/21 Sleepy Translations c43
05/02/21 Sleepy Translations c42
04/27/21 Sleepy Translations c41
04/24/21 Sleepy Translations c40
04/20/21 Sleepy Translations c39
04/18/21 Sleepy Translations c38
04/13/21 Sleepy Translations c37
04/10/21 Sleepy Translations c36
04/07/21 Sleepy Translations c35
04/03/21 Sleepy Translations c34
03/31/21 Sleepy Translations c33
03/30/21 Sleepy Translations c32
03/23/21 Sleepy Translations c31
03/21/21 Sleepy Translations c30
03/16/21 Sleepy Translations c29
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11 Reviews sorted by

New razmatazz rated it
May 6, 2021
Status: c43
This is one of those really good and tragic novels where you can understand ALL the characters, not just the MC. I’m looking forward to the character development!!!
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New mitji rated it
April 15, 2021
Status: c37
This story is reaaal good. It brings the suffering of the FL closer to the hearts of the readers and that's probably why I bawled my eyes out in reading this. Currently, there's no fluff or anything romantic going on and some may see that as "slow paced" development but that's actually good. It pointed out the hardship of the characters more which is definitely true to the plot and the tags of this story. Hopefully, we get to see more development in the couple's relationship. Or atleast, let Alyssa... more>> be relived of her pains. <<less
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Audmod rated it
December 8, 2020
Status: c23
I really like the story so far. It's slow paced but you don't feel like it's being dragged on. The POV switches between Alyssa & Sedrick which I love (in a lot of novels you don't get the ML side). Im excited to see their relationship develop.

I think the tragedy tag is there because the story revolves around the death of Sedricks brother and the sad life Alyssa has been living.... guess we'll see.

This also updates regularly!
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Ahmya rated it
November 27, 2020
Status: --
The ML’s brother (who was engaged to the FL) dies. So ML was forced to marry his sister-in-law...

I really like it so far... but the tragedy tag is worrying me....
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HentMas rated it
April 8, 2021
Status: c35
I can't get behind this novel...

It's got glaring problems, mainly "show, don't tell" we are expected to relate to "someone" inside of the novel but I can't see my self on anyone, we are told the MC is suffering but... she's not... we are told they treat her coldly... but she's mostly left alone, we are told a million different things to "pitty" the MC, but hell, things could be thousand times worse, she's so "alone" but she really isn't... she's suffering for things that... quite simply, are not really... more>> an issue, we are TOLD that we should feel THIS WAY because things are so BAD... but if you genuinely are reading the novel... nothing really is as "bad" as the author wants to make you feel.

If you look at the monologues and train of thought of each POV, you're expected to take it at face value, without thinking for a bit about what is REALLY happening in the novel, you get dragged along thoughts of self pitty and guilt... but when you "see" what is happening... nothing... absolutely nothing is happening, it's all in the head of the characters, it's all about "feeling" this way or "thinking" that way, not about what someone has done to anyone else...

And when finally something happens, it's... forced, to make the characters redeem themselves, to seek forgiveness, except instead of that, the author once again comes in and pencils in dumb thoughts of "I want to apologize but I can't"... why? well, that's up to you to decide! every single thought is brought forth in a way that YOU the READER must find your own justification, because we are left with nothing, just unfinished sentences that don't convey what the character is REALLY thinking or feeling.

And this happens with EVERYONE in the novel, I don't know if the author is a genius or just lazy, because having the reader find its own justification for the actions of the character seems like a good way of making every character relatable... but that also means that everyone is a wet-toilet-paper with no personality that the reader needs to fill in the blanks to make them as whatever they imagine.

"I'm so alone" except she isn't "I am suffering" except nothing is happening "I feel so sad" for something you didn't even do!?!?!?!?

Maybe I'm just too shameless and pride less to get behind any of this characters... <<less
4 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
numkip rated it
February 20, 2021
Status: c21
Honestly, I expected the ML to be tr*sh who blamed her. But he isn't. He's trying to be kind to her which makes me like him a lot compared to other MLs.

The novel is really well written, it's a sort of heavy one and I wouldn't be surprised if it turned really dark because of the tragedy tag.
4 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
bingereader2020 rated it
March 18, 2021
Status: c29
I really like how the pov switches and the sadness that is woven into the story. They know she's innocent but they can't help it and I find that really human. Although it is quite slow-paced, I think it's alright. You don't feel like it's being stretched out.

Does anyone know of other novels similar to this? (With the subtle sadness)
3 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Misoshiru rated it
December 29, 2020
Status: c10
I'm really liking this novel a far.

I like the way its written, it's very pleasant. The author and the translator are doing a great job.

And although the still at it's very beginning I'm very intrigued as to where the story is going.
2 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
naididja rated it
April 11, 2021
Status: c36
I love this.

Some reviews say that nothing happens and she is basically sad for no reason and it's not as bad as the author wants you to feel... But I very much disagree, the girl was raised under the surveillance of the Queen that hates her, basically has absolutely not control over her life in ANY was possible, then she got engaged had the hope of finding happiness in her new family that maybe she can live for once, but then her husband to be was killed by her own... more>> family, then she marries his brother that him and his family hate her guts, even if they didn't torment her (whitch the sister did) it's still a pretty shitty situation spacialy when the MC is clearly mentally unstable, even if it's all in her head it's still valid we are after all in our heads and sometimes our heads mess things up, plus I love how the MC is constantly trying to make the situation better even if she doesn't know how if it was me I would probably not be able to do that. It's easy to think of the right thing to say or do but doing it is very hard apologising to someone can be very hard because then you have to admit you wronged the person even if it was a friend let alone someone you labeled an enemy, I very much prefer this novel to novels who their characters don't get affected at all by their situation, MCs that are way to optimistic about an unknown futur as if they know they have plot armor. I love every single character in this novel maybe except the royal family <<less
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November27 rated it
March 15, 2021
Status: c28
I really love these kinds of novels (hidden gems) well while lots of novels show fluffy stuff, I really like how few novels like this shows this angst side (I mean not ur whole life can be honey dripping) the translation is amazing and the description on MC ‘s feeling is like wow 😯. Looking forward to see how this end... more>>
well I read somewhere Sid never show up as her husband for 3 years 😭and our MC have thought on dying (not sure, take it as a grain of salt) <<less
1 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
April 13, 2021
Status: c37
I like the way that the characters interact and feel towards each other. It's sad and all but honestly it's a bit difficult to see her just deteriorate. Tbh I think the real tragic FL is Sasha.

Waiting to see how this story develops, but so far I really like the ML and FL interactions.
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