“Sleeping your way up” might be one way to get ahead in the entertainment industry—but if you’ve already tried it and still aren’t famous, then you’re either hopeless or just plain s*upid.

Lin Zhoudu falls into both categories, at least by his own judgment.

Just when he’s convinced his life can’t get any worse, he encounters a rather unusual sugar daddy. From there, he begins to suspect he may never reach his “happy planet” in this lifetime.

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