PSA: if you dislike misunderstandings, AVOID THIS MF NOVEL BC b*tchES DIDN'T HAVE COMMUNICATION FOR sh*t AHHHHH... more>>

my very first taste of chinese tragedy, when i tell you i UGLY CRIED to this novel, i'm not joking, i literally read this at 4am and couldn't get out of bed for the next two days and didn't know what to do with myself bc i just broke the f*ck down to this.

tragedy aside, the way the author fleshed out the characters and the backstory as well as the interrelationships within the novel really made this novel all the more tragic. 10/10 would reread if i ever need a good cry. <<less

GOD THIS WAS TOP TIER, i literally sobbed until i couldn't breathe in nearly every chapter, the satisfaction i felt when the fl finally felt... more>> what it was like to be loved, the anger, the frustration oh my god THE ANGST ANGST ANGST ANGST THAT TRAGEDY TAG WHAT THE f*ck it rlly slaps u in the face goodbye if u want top tier sobbing in ur bed hurting u bc i love u angst UGH THIS ONE IS FOR U MF SO SO GOOD UGH 10/10 REC <<less

HOLY f*ck. ANGRY f*ckING TEARS. MISCOMMUNICATION GALORE. DROWNED IN MY TEARS FOR HALF AN HOUR AFTER THIS AND COULDN'T DO sh*t THE NEXT DAY. death to mf ah lai she can catch these hands bc if i see her its on SIGHT b*tch.... more>>

that aside, the translation is AMAZING, really captured the prose of the author without losing anything to translation, (literally can't even tell it's been translated, the vocab is ON POINT) plus the tragedy in this story is chefs kiss 10/10 rec, the fl is literally the most tragic character f*ck THE ML BC f*ck U YOU MISCOMMUNICATING b*tch

ps. sh*t hits you in the last chapter be f*cking warned. <<less

classic case of unrequited love turned requited upon death, shed a few tears but taking into account how it was only four chapters, extremely well... more>> done by the author, backstory made me SOB, just heartbroken over WHY COULDN'T YAWL COMMUNICATE THIS sh*t EARLIER ON PLS <<less

ANGRY. TEARS. AT THE MF ML bye bit*h the tears i shed did not deserve to be wasted on that mf. perfectly shows the cruelty... more>> of ancient china and how the discarded women of the harem were treated through a rose tinted lens. did not expect to cry this much after reading one chapter, if you want quick tears this is ur mf. <<less

I CRIED SO MUCH I COULDN'T SEE THE MONITOR. holy sh*t for a one shot, the emotions conveyed WHEW the tragedy i repeat THE MF TRAGEDY AND PLOT AT THE END, truly a tale of unrequited love, the prose, the perspectives, just the way the author narrated and weaved the story was just so hauntingly saddening, the depth of emotions; regret, sadness, pain, ALL IN ONE CHAPTER ??? ... more>>

GAH DAMN the first half literally gave me that feeling, as if one had something stuffed in your heart, that stifling tension in your throat when you're unable to cry but just feel immense frustration. the tragic love was so beautiful i almost didn't want to wake up from reading the novel. truly ironic. she spent so long loving someone who would never love her back and failed to realise there was someone right next to her all along. amazing. <<less

oh god. oh god. that ending really made me sob. since i'm a sucker for lines that mention that x is x's lifetime's regret, etc,... more>> this mf SHORT STORY MF AHHHHHHH i really just want to punch something hASDFKLJSD both ml and fl's actions are valid, both have suffered immense heart ache and arguably fl && reader has more than enough reason to hate ml BUT i rlly just could not bring myself to hate him. his persistent devotion toward the fl over the years despite her obvious hatred toward him rlly weathered away my feelings of resentment toward him so much so that i was rooting for a happy ending, BUT OFC THAT TRAGEDY TAG WAS JUST LAUGHING RIGHT IN MY FACE FUALKSDFJFDSJ <<less

f*ck i reaLly ugly cried in this one, a wind chime truly does bring tears. the anger, the pain the fl went through throughout her trials was beautifully written, the story was so ironically beautiful, it just kept going in a cycle and i think that's what made it truly beautiful. that sort of self sacrificing love will always pull at my heartstrings, ugh.... more>>

edit: OH MY GOD WAIT I JUST REALISED I MISREAD THE ENDING AND IDEK IF THAQT MAKES THIS MORE OR LESS TRAGIC. GOD SO THIS RLLY IS UNREQUITED LOVE GOODBYE I HATE IT HERE. STILL A 10/10 REC THO HASLDFKJDF <<less

oh god, i'm not sure how i feel about this but i still sobbed throughout this story. a tale of two people who loved, one too much, and one too late. the unrequited love the fl had for the ml while he was alive and the love that he had for her after her death, even unbeknownst to her truly made for a heartwrenching tragedy. her love is constantly shown throughout her actions, her words, it's glaringly obvious that she'd do anything for him, even to the point of hurting others. meanwhile his love is shown through his thoughts, his actions that he performs mechanically just to prove to the fl that he can live... more>> well after her passing prove how much her death drove him to insanity, to the point where it had also become clear to everyone around him.

various ending notes from the translator perfectly summarise this story; tbh their whole ending note was a perfect closing to the story.

Madmen – He Yujin; Gao Fei. One was insane while she lived; the other was forced to insanity as he lived.

Their love ended before it could begin. He Yujin will never know that, even without realising it, Gao Fei had already come to love her, and Gao Fei will never have the chance to tell her that, it turns out, his love for her was no less than hers for him.

He Yujin loved too much; Gao Fei loved too late. <<less

oh god, i teared up at the end. splendidly written for a one shot, the poetic prose and translation really hits you with one liners,... more>> regretful bastard trope rlly satisfied me && the imagery the author puts forth whilst describing his lamenting is just so artful. if this was longer, would definitely be ugly sobbing. <<less

IT HITS YOU DESPITE IT ONLY BEING ONE CHAPTER rlly makes u ache for all the suffering mothers go thru, pls hug them and be... more>> filial toward them guys bc i am literally sobbing on my bedroom floor rn ;-; <<less

wow idk if i was dehydrated and just had try tear ducts or what, i'm surprised i didn't cry, in fact, i'm actually disappointed. the... more>> story is quite draggy, which is understandable since the backstory needs substantial time and building, but the epilogue really didn't scratch my angst itch. i was expecting from the reviews and the chapter length for there to be one hell of a tear jerker of an epilogue but it failed to meet my expectations. it's a nice read if you're looking for the type of dull ache in ur chest angst, but it won't satisfy you if you're looking to cry. the love story between them is truly heartbreaking though. <<less

left a dull ache in my chest. it's a bittersweet, revenge-filled story that has you wishing for our main couple to end up together in... more>> another life ;-; <<less

UM I WAS MORE PISSED THAN ANYTHING ???? OVERTURNING THE WORLD ???? MF DIDN'T OVERTURN ANYTHING HALJSDF this novel literally embodies the unresolved feeling. ml... more>> was nothing more than a doormat, literally did nothing that helped the fl, everything he did pissed me off. tbh this was more of a tragedy for the fl, she was the one that stepped out first every single time but the ml always left her hanging, right till the very end. he didn't exact any revenge for the fl DESPITE HER DISGUSTINGLY GRUESOME AND UNDESERVED DEATH, sure he grieved a lot, hiS WHOLE LIFE ig but literally did nothing to benefit the fl. yes. i teared up near the end. but the angst could've been so much better, MORE TEAR FACTOR PLS. <<less

angsty but didn't manage to make me cry, but still pretty depressing considering it's only one chapter. no toxic mls in this one (thank god).... more>> if you're looking for a short and melancholic read, this one's for you. not much fleshing out of characters considering it's only one chapter so don't expect super in depth development or attachment to characters. plot is quite typical as well. around 3.5-4 stars maybe ?? <<less

tbr. highly anticipated bc of one of the xia yu's review && it's between a society defying fl and eunuch ml ??? ugh u can... more>> smell the tragedy from ten thousand li away with this one. <<less

tbr but from the reviews, highly apathetic and shitty ml incoming.