Most importantly, 50 year old Li Rong had Su Rongqing in her heart.

That person had been with her for 25 years and even killed her. Perhaps his betrayal would make Li Rong resent him, but love and hate oftentimes coexisted. He could not get in between such deep feelings between them, nor could he tolerate it.

He didn't want his wife to yearn for another person in her heart. This was no different from what 20 year old Li Rong had thought of him back then.

Eighteen year old Li Rong was very good.

Although he didn't want to admit it, Pei Wenxuan still remembered that at the beginning of their marriage, when he lifted Li Rong's veil, she raised her head and looked up at him with embarrassment and curiosity. Then, when they exchanged cups of wine, she said in a frank manner: "Wenxuan, no matter how we came to be together, having become husband and wife, I still want to live with you for the rest of my life." At that time, he also seriously thought that he would live with Li Rong, have children and live peacefully for the rest of their lives.

That was, until Li Rong found out that he liked Qin Zhenzhen.

In truth, he didn't even know what kind of feelings there were between him and Qin Zhenzhen, whether it was love or merely responsibility. They grew up together as children, and he only had her in his heart and hoped to live with Qin Zhenzhen for the rest of his life, but he could not do so.

It's not a big deal either, " Li Rong laughed, her tears seemed like they could fall at any time, "Why didn't you say so sooner?"

Pei Wenxuan stared blankly at her. He wanted to deny it, but he felt that Li Rong wasn't wrong either. There was no such love between him and Li Rong because it was impossible for a person to truly love two people at the same time. He already had Qin Zhenzhen in his heart, so how could he make room for Li Rong?

Seeing that he still had not spoken, Li Rong lowered her head and softly said: "If you make it clear, then it won't be a problem. We will live as we have in the future, but I hope Pei daren remembers this in his heart."

"I'm not your wife, and you're not my husband. I don't care who is in your heart, and you don't need to care about who I am with. You and I will have our own lives, and we will each have our own happiness."

He used to resent Su Rongqing and felt that he had stolen his happiness from him. However, now that Su Rongqing wasn't the Su Rongqing of those days and Li Rong had also become 18 year old Li Rong, he looked back and realized that it wasn't actually anyone's fault that he had walked down this path in life. The person who was most responsible was none other than himself.

"He was born to power, but his entire childhood was spent as a tool—a favoured tool, but a tool nonetheless, beset on all sides by half-siblings and the plots of the nobility. Even his royal father, whom he thought loved him most, schemed against him when he was of age to marry. Still, when he married a wife, he thought they would be together forever and that he would love her. Alas—she could never truly return his sincerity, because she always thought her true love was her ex-fiancé and childhood friend. She was bright but impoverished and used his birthright to climb to power, but she was always too proud to take their marriage seriously and admit that she didn't truly love her ex. Her pride blinded her, and never could she try to love her husband wholeheartedly, for their marriage, itself, was something forced upon her by an Imperial Edict—something her ego could not bear. Instead, she took care of her ex for a lifetime, and thought about him constantly, seeking out his friendship regardless of their marriage. By the time she repented in their next lives and thought 'hey my legal husband's actually pretty good', his heart was already broken."

Li Chuan, the emperor could not sleep with Shangguanya and kept vomitting after the deed. Just like him, Shangguanya also vomitted after. They were both disgusted, but their fate was alreaday tied the moment they were born in the same clan. Shangguanya needed a son, albeit disgusted with the emperor. Li Chuan had to stabilize the country and be filial towards the clan, hence he offered himself to Shangguanya -at least his body-, albeit unwilling. It was even said later that both even had to take medicine before seeing each other at night.

When Shangguanya still could not get pregnant, the surpressed clans worked togetehr. The Su and Shangguan clan made a decision to send Su Ronghua in order to make Shangguanya gave birth to an heir. It was the best night for the two of them. Yet, they also knew that they were doomed. Just like Su Ronghua said,

The moment he entered the palace, he knew it would be his funeral

Su Ronghua knew that the emperor only favored Qin Zhenzen, so he tried to poisoned her son, yet QZZ always tasted everything given to her son, thus making her poisoned. Her death made Li Chuan crazy, he surpressed the clans, and no longer cared about the country. The Su clan was wiped clean, and Su Rongqing was saved by Li Rong

I became disappointed at first when Su Rongqing chose to go againts our leads, but he also knew about the past life, he knew that he lost many of his loved ones, can I really blame him? Even so, Su Ronghua still told him that he might make a mistake

the Princess did give all of her heart for the ML, once. In the early days of their marriage, Li Rong loved Pei Wenxuan wholeheartedly. She was young back then, a blushing bride in her 18, excited and full of hope. For him, she sacrificed her pride in front of undeserving in-laws, making carefully-picked soups, and done things that she would never usually do. She was the emperor's most favorite daughter, after all. Her pride usually is as high as the sky, so it speaks a lot when she did all of those things for Pei Wenxuan. BUT then, Pei Wenxuan "cheated" on her, and he himself admitted to do so at the time. The rosy picture that she dreamt and painted for the two of them shattered. Then as years gone by, she... found her own ways to cope and goes on with her life, although her relationship with Pei Wenxuan was never really repaired until their second life.

Now in their second life, Li Rong, a 50 years old woman in soul who have plots and schemes as her bread and butter up until her last breath, is not someone who can love easily. She have seen how it destroyed her brother, her mother, other consorts, and how it shaped her complicated relationship with the Su something man. She was HELLA afraid of Pei Wenxuan's feelings. Fo someone who've seen the most ugly side of "love", loving someone wholeheartedly is hard. Her inner struggle was surprisingly realistic, especially the one where she feels undeserving of such feelings, and how she was at a loss on how to deal with it. And when she finally, hesitantly opened her heart slightly and earnestly say for him to " wait for her" as she reacquainted herself with the feelings that she have almost forget she has.... well.... that's just makes me cry (´༎ຶ ͜ʖ ༎ຶ `) ♡

esp when he's like on his remarriage day, "it's ok if u end up with your old lover bc I know you love him & I want you to be happy in this life"

(idk if it goes through but) her considering a marriage with her old lover in front of the evidently upset ML

a ML considering another marriage even if the MC was saying they were ok with it but here it's switched

The ML is selfish:

When I read his spoken words or his thoughts it eventually always revolves around him. He comes immediately looking for Li Rong in the second life because he wants to and because he spent his past life all for his little moonlight so in this second life he wants to enjoy Li Rong's sincere devotion (his words). Even in the second life, he never once verbalises or thinks about how he would treat his little moonlight, which makes him seem fickle and keeping all his options open.

Idiotic, short-sighted and self-centered:

He immediately without a second thought schemes against her potential marriage partners, because he wants to disappoint be with her a second time around, but that his schemes against Li Rong, a member of royalty, could potentially harm her never crosses his mind. And that she might not want to marry him and he maybe could respect that, isn't apparently worth thinking about either. After all, he wants to enjoy the 18-year old Li Rong's devotion.

Hypocritical:

He keeps calling his little moonlight affectionately Zhenzhen even in the second life, and when Li Rong gets angered by his relentless clinging to his moonlight, he gets all brainless: "What did I do? Princess, getting angry isn't good for you!" I wish she'd throw him into a lake a hundred more times. He finally stops when his little moonlight crushes his narcissistic delusions.

And yet, whenever Li Rong treats Su guy nicely but distantly (and she doesn't call him affectionately either!), he's all upset and pouting, nursing his bruised ego. Hypocrite much?!

Needy:

He and his inferiority complex need constant cuddling. I wish he'd finally act like an adult and work on improving himself instead of pouting all the time at the unfairness of other people's skills and achievements, in this case the Su guy's qualifications.

Even when he admits that he treated Li Rong unfairly, this self-reflection doesn't amount to anything as he always thinks about his feelings and wants first and I have yet to hear/read a credible sincere thought about what Li Rong may want and what may be best for her. His character is completely insufferable and I wish the author had the good sense to lay off imparting so many of his thoughts. In fact, I wish the author had had the sense to be less verbose and focus more on the plot in the first third or half of the book instead of being so redundant about the conversations between ML and Li Rong and their thoughts.

Li Rong, on the other hand, is clearly the only adult between them. Se tries to navigate the complex political situation among the royals and ministers and keeping her brother from repeating the past life's mistakes. When the ML gets pouty at her interactions with the Su guy, she calmly explains her reasons – which his insecure little ego often can't take. Is she supposed to cuddle him? He neither deserves nor should expect it considering his own little moonlight and the fact that he's an adult. His character is so flawed and exhaustingly short-sighted and self-centered, if I were Li Rong, I wouldn't be able to have such patience to indulge his fragile ego for this long. Being reborn, I would want nothing to do with him and focus on people that are actually sincere towards me. Grow up, ML.

I guess what annoys me the most about the ML is that he seems to have learned nothing from the past life. In the first life, he was stubbornly set in his way of guarding his little moonlight's memory (even twenty years after her death) and was too stubborn and prideful to let go and find a way to build a life with Li Rong. In the second life, he is stubbornly set in marrying Li Rong, alternatively claiming it's because he wants to enjoy a good life or because he wants Li Rong to have a good life. But he never once spells out why having him in her life again would possibly benefit Li Rong or her happiness this time around. Especially when he finds out she has retained her past life's memories and more importantly feelings as well and that she clearly doesn't want to marry him again. What good would it do for her to marry him? Comes across as self-centered and short-sighted again.

The only upside is, I guess, that all his character flaws make him a pretty rounded character. Kudos, author, I guess?

I like Li Rong, she's strong but not harsh (like so many of those supposedly strong but really just blood-thirsty female leads in C-novels), nor clinging to her past feelings for Su guy or the past in general. She's the only one of the two trying to move forward. She's even able to think about what might be best for Zhenzhen in the second life. I wish this novel had been more plot-driven with a focus on Li Rong instead of character-driven and being this long-winded about their repetitive thoughts.

Once reincarnated, the ML looks at his mistakes and choices, and re-evaluates them all. He doesn't become genius right away, but through struggling and self-reflection he realizes his own negative qualities and works to change them. This starts for our ML around like chapter 1, and it's a continuous growth while debating which path to take. This happens for our FL around the 2nd to last chapter, like chapter 165. ALL throughout the novel, the FL does not recognize her feelings shoving them down instead. She also makes ML jealous by connecting with her past 'lover' in first life, and doing s*upid ass stuff like calling a harem of men to entertain her for the night. Ya really... She is just a bit*h for 160 chapters, hurting the ML the whole time, and in the last few chapters she realizes all her mistakes and gives one apology, so now their a happy family of course. what bulllllllshiittttttt. That's why I think this novel is too gender oriented. The FL is upset that the ML thought he loved another girl in his first lifetime. HE NEVER laid hands on her, or made romantic advances, he was just like a friend. So FL decides to cuckold him by having a male eunuch (no pen*s so no sex) servant that she makes out with and has an 'emotional connection' towards.

The only reason to like this guy, is because he was described as wealthy (wealthy origins, like amazing family) and he is somewhat smart. He also 'understands' MC (FL) feelings pretty well, but he doesn't act to help her, instead he uses this knowledge to actually make her life much worse. In both lifetimes. So I don't personally see any positive qualities. He is a HONEYTRAP, he took advantage of female at her lowest emotional state, for his own political purposes. He may have liked her eventually, but not enough to not kill her haha, what a JOKE. so not that much. And he still has this perspective in second life, and you guys STILL want him to win??? f*cking insane.... I feel like some people just want to go against the grain for the sake of it.. or they wanna see FL die again.

Realistically think about what he did in the first lifetime (and even second). He is a POS. He acted as a honeypot and assassin for the princess, destroying the possibility of a relationship between FL and ML. After doing this, HE KILLS THE FEMALE LEAD (MC). He kills her, and blames it on the husband so that she kills him. This right there is enough for me to say f*ck him, no redemption necessary, he's done, goneso. But for some reason FL doesn't care that much now that she realizes it was him and not her husband. when it was her husband she was PISSED though..... so s*upid...

The reasoning for why she is close to the 2nd ML is because they both have the same emotional distrust of others, so neither fully fall in love, as their more concerned about politics... that's just not convincing.... It makes for a really shitty couple though that's for sure. Where they are constantly lying to each other and willing to kill the other person to advance their political goals... And some readers still ship the 2nd ml.... Anyone who ships the 2nd ML should delete their novel updates account, or at least stop leaving reviews.

I ship the 2nd ml, ONLY IF the ML could have another girl. Then the ML would actually be respected and loved, and those 2 psychopaths could love and eventually kill each other. That would've made this novel 10/10 for me.