Never Marry a Man With Two Tintins


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This is the story of a person who transmigrated into a world with a radically different worldview.

So different, in fact, that he is considered a female in that world!

Cheng Nuo: What? Why did you say that I’m female?

Author: You only have one Tintin. The males of this world have two Tintins.

Cheng Nuo: No way! My hands are itchy… I want to cut one off!

Associated Names
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Recommendation Lists
  1. Mpreg
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21 Reviews sorted by

readerz rated it
May 7, 2018
Status: c35
Written by the same author as "Transmigrating into a Mob Character to Rehabilitate the Villain Plan, " this a parody yaoi novel with a bit of smut later on. It's funny and mostly lighthearted.

Short summary: Cheng Nuo inexplicably transmigrated into a world where all males have two d*cks. Since he has only one, he is considered a female.

The early chapters are slice of life about the MC's daily life. He and the other characters are mostly 10 to 12-year-old children. They grow up later on, that is when the smut... more>> happens.

Spoiler about the romantic pairing:


It's 3P. MC has two romantic partners - the boy who picked him up when he first woke up and the white-haired boy


MC is the kind, helpful, saintly type, but not annoying. He's basically a "white lotus" character. <<less
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Kiki0246 rated it
July 22, 2018
Status: c70


Soooo from the title, you'd probably most definitely expect for this to be a novel with intimate scenes appearing often right? But NOPE. If you're looking for a bunch of intercourse, this is NOT your novel. Instead, there is just a ton of cuteness, adorableness, tsunderes, and just... aaaahhh they so sweet and adorable. nothing happens til like, chapter 40 and even then its still fairly minor at pg-15~?

For when the scenes are, final... more>> couple, and other stuff:


The final couple is... this is a 3P! Liu Guang, Bai Rui, and Cheng Nuo are all together! No second male lead syndrome XD.

The first intimate thing (handjob) is like, 45~ ish chapters in, don't remember rly clearly. It wasn't anything big, pretty minor, R-15 I'd say.

Uhm the MC is kind of soft hearted towards Bai Rui, which might annoy some people. For example, despite being pretty much married to Liu Guang and saying he'd only love him, Cheng Nuo slept with Bai Rui (literal meaning: nothing happened) bc he thought he would leave Bai Rui forever and Bai Rui was turning into an adult. BUT remember that this is a 3P in the first place, and the author intended it to be that way!

I love Bai Rui and Liu Guang's interactions later though XD. Bai Rui even gives Liu Guang a pornography/love making guide so he doesn't hurt the MC and the best thing is- LIU GUANG ACTUALLY KEEPS IT ROFL


All in all, I'd say that this is an adorable, funny novel and one of the better danmeis that I've read. Give it a try~!

EDIT: Chapter 85 now and WHERE DID THE FLUFF GO ;-; aaaahhhhh

EDIT: Completed. Oh the fluff came back real soon~ with some other stuff lol <<less
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Hals rated it
May 10, 2018
Status: v1c3
Super loving this so far!

The MC is quite likable imo, he has an easy going personality which I quite admire, but isn't an airhead, if you know what I mean? lol His disbelief about the whole tintin situation and his adjusting to the world is quite amusing but also realistic- for some reason, I just feel he's just a Great Guy haha

The translations so far are 👌 It's the kind of novel where I'd immediately click on the update if it showed up at almost 1am even though I was... more>> just about to go to sleep lmao. (Not talking big lol I just did this aha 😪😪)

Regarding the romantic pairing...

The review before mine, by readerz, helpfully pointed out that its 3P - I'm eternally grateful! I was actually just reading ch.3 when one ML was being cute and I was like awwww but the other ML before also attracted me with his "leave or die" antics (lmao) so I didnt want either to end up with an achey breaky heart and was really questioning this matter with a heavy heart beforehand. Normally I avoid spoilers like the plague but I was really glad I clicked ahead for that one. I just wanted to know who not to root for but the answer was even better than I could have ever imagined 😢❤ Now I can read in peace with my mischivous heart at peace lol u guys get what I mean? If u do, clap ur hands 👏👏


So far we'd been introduced to two people who stood out as love interests, but

as u probs guessed im someone who really doesnt have patience for melodramatic harems or love triangles where someone ends up disappointed, so threesomes are forever the answer in my heart 😂 Super looking forward to the smut ahahaha


Regarding the personalities of the love interests, one is a righteous, kinda tsundere type while I get the impression the other is quite cold and stoic haha.

Man I reaaaaallly cant wait for this 3P ahhhhhhhh

It's only chapter 3, so needless to say if I got their characterisations completely wrong, please shower the rains of forgiveness upon me hahahaha but fr like huhu

Im actually very bad at writing reviews im afraid but Im super excited about this novel! Its really cute so far, and im excited about the romance! The tags on this novel really excite me lmao

Also how gorgeous is that cover art? Im legit dying call 911 I cant get up

131 chapters - 3 down, 128 to go 😢 But im really looking forward to every update from our hardworking translator ❤ Do give this a try! <<less
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Ukimi rated it
December 17, 2018
Status: Completed
[Will come back and edit my review here later. Just wanted to clarify something that another review said.]

Okay, so I finished MTLing this novel and I really loved it.

But for now, I would like to clarify some things another reviewer said that got my head tilting.

  1. Spoiler

    Cheng Nuo DID NOT forget about Liu Guang AT ALL. Cheng Nuo and Bai Rui were trapped in a seal and couldn't leave, even if they wanted to. Cheng was actually heading back home to Liu Guang but got sealed with Bai Rui. Cheng Nuo thought about Liu Guang daily and was finding ways to leave because he knew Liu Guang would worry.

  2. Spoiler

    Cheng Nuo did NOT leave Liu Guang for 5 whole years. That was a dream Cheng Nuo had, he only left for 2 years, not 5. Also, one day in the seal is 2 days outside, he was gone +6months and it became 2 years.

  3. Spoiler

    Bai Rui isn't a sly bastard, IDK where they got that from. However, he did some selfish things at times due to his love towards Cheng Nuo. Selfish yes, sly no.

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Celissiye rated it
August 15, 2019
Status: c38
To me, this isn't a BL story about a man thrown into a world where he's become a female. This is a story about a 'guy' who already had personality traits that women often do who was conveniently thrown into a world where 'he' became a woman, which suited his mother hen/kind personality perfectly. And this isn't the unbearable part, but that this world is so overly patriarchal.

Let me give a few examples. The MC meets the first ML, Liu something, who at first beats him up to rob him,... more>> BUT when ML sees that MC is 'female'... ML immediately treats him better and wants to raise him into a wife. It's not that the first ML likes MC for his personality or anything. The only way ML starts to like him -although obviously he becomes attached to MC later- is because MC is FEMALE. It's like being lucky enough to find a diamond ring on the ground and deciding to use that to propose later. Over time, you like the diamond ring you've found more and more because of it's sentimental value. So, interactions up to chs 30+ include the hapless MC thinking that he and ML are some in some kind of innocent family relationship, when in fact the child ML is already blushing and can't wait to be making MC his wife (albeit not knowing the sexual part yet). The second ML is the typical ice cold type and thus has more potential than the first, as he doesn't immediately covet the MC just because 'he's' female.

This branches into my next point. And that is that this novel reminds me of everything I loathe about overly patriarchal societies--the objectification of women. This story might not be centered on s*x and smut until later, yet the themes of sexual tension and s*x never leave your mind for even a second. Rape, stealing females, cutting off one d*ck and pretending to be female for benefits, men flaunting power with multiple females? Yep, common stuffs here! Many of the conflicts include MC fending off jealous folks and protecting his lower hole... and hiding the fact he is female. It doesn't help that women in this world setting are in short supply, viewed scarcely as anything but the 'baby-makers'. The synopsis says MC transmigrated into place with a 'radically different worldview', but I don't think I agree with that. I'm not sure if this is supposed to make me more aware about the state of the world for women in some places/ancient times or simply more depressed about it.

Do I hate female protagonists? No. But I don't enjoy them when they are essentially powerless, looked down upon by every ML/male in the story, and can do nothing about it except getting rescued. And yet the MC remains oh so righteous, kind, and mature at heart, impressing the MLs. A little Mary Sue.

So, then, why did I read this story to begin with if I should have suspected as much from the author's previous novel and the world setting (mpreg, MC into female) ? That's because these things don't automatically make the novel bad. I was also interested in seeing how an author would handle 3p. In general, there are stories where the MC becomes a female and I'm okay with it. This story just isn't among those ranks.

And there were ways to handle this story that I would continue reading it, and, perhaps, even been impressed;

1.) The MC was still male in this world, but perhaps mistaken for a female! Then there would still be misunderstandings, and this would essentially erase the fact that first ML liked MC because he planned to raise him into wife. The two ML would have to fall in love with MC despite the fact he isn't a female and cannot, in fact, deliver them babies. Wow, a male that got two MLs in a world that obsesses over Females, now wouldn't that be romantic?

2.) MC could actually DEFEND himself and grow more powerful throughout the story. So what if he's female if he can stick up for himself without relying on the MLs every time!... instead, MC seems to have martial skills that makes his body resistant to damage and good at wood/medicinal arts. Great, just great, he can have these passive defensive skills that make it necessary for the MLs to act as the brawn. It would have been easy to give him fighting prowess as well, but the author perhaps decided that wouldn't be dramatic enough.

In any case, far, far from my cup of tea. Sorry not sorry to be a stick in the mud to those who finds this story funny and cute. Who cares about the 3p! The first and second ML despise each other so far, I doubt they'll ever stop fighting over the MC. Even if they had seemed like 1 & 2 would get along to create a real relationship between all three of them I would have been more interested, but nope, nope, nope.

Side note-good translation and writing style (thus instead of 1 star it gets 2). <<less
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Mimilove98 rated it
November 21, 2018
Status: Completed
I have read the other novel written by the same author. So I decided to give it a try. The story was pretty much fun to begin with and the interactions between the MC and ML were cute. But in the later parts I decided that it is not my cup of tea. The story is nothing like the villain rehabilitation plan ... more>>

Even though it says it's a 3P the MC really hurts the feelings of Liu Guang. Bai Rui turns out to be a sly bastard. MC is always swaying with his feelings

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Painkiller rated it
May 23, 2018
Status: Completed
I was interested in this because it's by the same author as Transmigrating into a Mob Character to Rehabilitate the Villain.

The main character is a white lotus type (pure and kind) but hilarious. His reaction when he found out that he is female and that men have two tintins was laugh out loud funny.

The romace is pretty fun and hot. This has smut in later chapters. ;) However, as the author's note warned, the plot is a bit "dog blood" (cliche) in some parts.

All in all, I recommend this to... more>> all BL lovers, especially those who like Mob Rehab Plan. <<less
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darlingv rated it
February 22, 2019
Status: Completed
I disliked the main plot enough to sign up and write a review lol. If not for the extras I would've given the story one star. In fact I think the author should've just made the extra into the main story!

What I hated:

... more>>

I hated how Cheng Nuo was completely biased towards Bai Rui. Sure, the author tried to balance out the time spent between Bai Rui and Liu Guang, but it's clear Cheng Nuo was more into Bai Rui based on their interactions. I feel like the author should've just let Cheng Nuo end up with Bai Rui to make Cheng Nuo's character less detestable. He just seems selfish and greedy.


What I loved:


I love how we get a glimpse into Li Yue's character. Even in the main story, I found it hard to completely hate him. I, too, felt that he deserved a second chance at life to experience the warmth of Cheng Nuo's love. Cheng Nuo's character and interations with Li Yue were much more lovable. In fact, among the three MLs I feel like Li Yue was the gentlest and most sincere. Imo, Bai Rui only claimed to love Cheng Nuo, but he never truly warmed up to Cheng Nuo, perhaps only during the papapa scenes. It felt more like lust than love.


If like me, you feel empty after finishing the main story, I guarantee the extras will make your insides all fuzzy again!

I also want to add that the translations are really well done! <<less
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Hyperkaoru rated it
May 21, 2018
Status: v1c5
This is the one that I kept waiting and checking for the update everyday. It's funny in cute and weird ways which is refreshing.
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aNonYm0U5 rated it
January 14, 2019
Status: --
I remember some works of these author, they like to imprison they're MC making up misunderstanding's that will result in them being eaten thoughroughly by the ML.
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May 20, 2018
Status: --
It has some interesting gender roles stuff. I wonder what a tintin is, and hope that it's nothing like a chin chinchin, otherwise people having two of them is a bit horrific The plot at the beginning is an adult make transmigrates onto a colorful planet completely different to his previous one. Apparently, gender morphology is narrower here so women do not have bobs or even vagenes.
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RoseAmethyst remembrance
RoseAmethyst remembrance rated it
February 15, 2020
Status: c49.2
The premise of this story is interesting. A 19 yr old MC transmigrated to the slums of an ancient society (and by the MC's speculation, doesn't seem to be associated with an actual Chinese Dynasty as the people's clothing style is unfamiliar to him). The world he transmigrates is very dysfunctional. The wealth gap is very extreme and the lower class populace live extremely primitive lives. The concept of 'female' and 'male' is very different and it's what the MC struggles with the most to accept (if the title suggests).

I... more>> really like the MC. He has a rational temperament and extremely observant. From the beginning, he's been extremely cautious when encountering new people and new environments (as he should be in a completely unfamiliar world). It's really interesting to read his observations (and more importantly, his own reactions. Lol). For example, he quickly realizes the status of Liu Guang just by observing how others treat Liu Guang in sharp contrast to the fact that Liu Guang looks a lot younger. He realizes that he's transmigrated to a dangerous world and that his best chances of survival is to stick with Liu Guang despite being turned off by Liu Guang's intention to groom him into being his 'future wife.' LMAO

If you want to learn more about this in detail, I put it into the spoiler box below. It's not really spoiler but I put it there because the explanation is kind of long:


To put the wealth gap into perspective: On one end of the spectrum, the nobles are living flamboyant lives with a massive harem of 'females' who are raised and groomed from a young age to be their perfect toys. One the other end, the residents of the slums live in an almost inhabitable area which is treated by the nobles as a dumping ground for their tr*sh, resources are scarce (the land isn't suitable for farming and the nearest clean water source is 3 miles away), and the 'female' population are so scarce that they are sometimes shared by larger 'male' population. In a sense, this correlates to the Gender Balance Crisis that plague China as a result of the One-Child Policy.
Because of how difficult life is in the slums, even young children are pretty mature and brutal. The MC realizes the acts of cruelty that these kids are capable of. Because the land isn't suitable for farming, the residents mostly sustains themselves through hunting and the MC learns that many of the animals in this world are considerably more dangerous than the animals of our world, hence the unusual maturity level of the residents. The two ML's ages are estimated to be about 10 yrs.


So right off the bat, the MC wakes up in this new world and things gets a little chaotic for him very quickly as the grim reality of this world is thrown in his face. There's no "system" to explain what's happening. The MC has some similarities to Shen Yuan of "Scum Villian Self-Saving System" as he always shows a calm and gentle temperament to other characters but always seem to be having a meltdown mentally as he tries to make sense of the craziness of this world. I find the MC's character to be pretty realistic with a comical undertones (kind of like SVSSS).

His reaction to learning about the 'males' having "two tintins" is the most hilarious part.

I have a soft spot for Liu Guang, the first ML that the MC meets. Despite is almost savage nature, his sincerity and devotion to the MC is really touching. The first part of the story where everyone is still kids is probably my favorite part. It mainly focuses on the day-to-day lives of the kids and how they survive. It's super cute. Especially how Liu Guang tries to act like all big and manly, lol. I feel like the MC's gentle personality fits well with Liu Guang's rouge nature. I do kind of agree with other reviewers that the author seems to be biased towards the other ML, Bai Rui. <<less
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PurpleMousse rated it
June 28, 2018
Status: v1c12
The MC is really likeable and the ML is very cute. The MC also isn't really op and gets everything his way. And the 2 mains are growing right now so it's all just cuteness everywhere
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Victuuri Road
Victuuri Road rated it
May 8, 2018
Status: c42
Mm... it's cute! ノ (・ω・) ノ

Was confused why the kid kept insisting that the MC was female... then I realized the dudes in this novel literally have 2 d*cks. HAHAHA

POOR MC. How will those things fit...
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BobChan rated it
December 13, 2019
Status: c43
Found it interesting at first but as you continue reading, many of the small things written becomes annoying—leading to putting off reading the book more than once (almost dropped it).

... more>>

The MC, Cheng Nuo is a transmigrator that ended up in the body of a ‘female’. The world that he transmigrated to is a world without any females that we know and instead


females are males who only have one tintin or as you would say: penis. Those who have two tintin are considered ’males’.


The MC was likable for the first 5 chapters, than after that he just becomes quite annoying. Being a white lotus and Mary Sue character; he’s like an untouchable little white moonlight. He constantly wants to look out for others even after being rejected more than once (prime example is the second male lead).

His self righteousness often leads him into trouble because his mindset is not like those of this world. Subsequently, others have to clean up his mess for him and there doesn’t seem to be any growth for him.

Not saying that the MC doesn’t grow in strength, but he’s just never strong enough to protect himself—frequently being beaten or forced to comply, lest he wants to die. It would be okay if he could grow and defeat or even be of help to the MLs, but he’s not. He’s just the fuse for the villains and his abilities almost ends up being useless for him.

Another annoying point: he often points out that he’s mentally older and that he only considers them; especially the first ML as children/ his younger brothers. He’s dependent on the first ML (for like the first years of his life, after transmigrating) and doesn’t bother to fix the situation or set things clear with anyone.


I find him unlikable, especially this type of Mary Sue white lotus, who never realizes the devastation they cause by acting as they are—thinking that there’s nothing wrong with them acting so. He never really thinks about the repercussions of his action.


One is the most annoying things that he does is: spare those who shouldn’t be spared. There is a mini villain in the second arc of the book that is solely there because the MC couldn’t bear to deal with the other. Simply thinking that the other would think differently after—the MC left him alive even after being told that they would come back for the MC and get revenge one day.

And that isn’t the only reoccurring villain as well. There’s actually quite a few due to the ‘forgiving’ nature of the MC. (I would rather say that it would be better to say that it is their ‘s*upidity’ that saved the villains.)

I prefer having a cold hearted MC, who has more intellect to think about the future And handles it ahead of time. vs. Someone who keeps claiming that they are, but fails to foresee the pit they dug for themselves.


A quite disturbing part of the world setting that might deter you from reading:


The world is extremely patriarchal. It’s actually quite realistic in sense that their world runs by “power is law”—often making the victims seem pitiful as you read.

Due to the shortage of ‘females’ in the world, they’re forced to share/ fight them. The ones in the Sect are just like the prostitues in the military camp. It’s extremely saddening as you think about it... but nothing you can do really.

It’s also not done voluntarily but it is their way of life, so it’s become the norm for everyone (except the MC, who can’t understand that and comes from modern society).


The translation is grueling slow but the quality is good. I would recommend stocking chapters to read, rather than read whenever it is updated—as that could be whenever.

Overall, I wouldn’t recommend this novel unless you’re out of something to read. Sad to say that I’m disappointed; especially in the MC and his personality. <<less
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Lucaroo rated it
November 11, 2019
Status: c48
I started reading this as a joke but.... I actually really like it LMAO the main three are so cute and I’m excited to see how this 3p works out?? I like that Cheng Nuo decides (as of ch48) to try to go along with his new worlds deal and give Liu Guang a chance :’) I thought this was gonna be a weird ppp book but it seems like there was quite a bit of thought put into the world building. I can’t wait to read this as it... more>> updates (╹◡╹) <<less
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SaintlyKindTolerantElder rated it
December 20, 2018
Status: c31
Pretty good novel, the characters are well written, and in my opinion the action flows smoothly and the dialogue is detailed enough to not bore the readers, but still make them receive information.

The yaoi thing is a bit... weird, but thankfully I am open minded enough about these sort of things to not really care. Thank god this novel doesn't have underage sex, like a certain sh*t yuri novel, but it still has some weird parts that happens when the protagonist is still underaged.

I like it.
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December 3, 2018
Status: c29
So far in I really enjoy this novel! It balances the right amount of cuteness with the story so it just becomes fantastic!

When I first saw this novel a few months ago I was actually a bit put off with the name and description, you know.. A male having two 'tintins'? And didn't read it, but I'm happy that I did because it's actually a good story!
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Chibidere rated it
July 19, 2018
Status: c14
So cute! I wish there were more chapters!

Title is self-explanatory, but the all the characters are interesting and the interactions are very funny. Another great danmei/yaoi read.
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Alta rated it
November 20, 2018
Status: c27
The premise seems so cracked and sounds like a title for shallow smut but this is surprisingly well executed!

I appreciate the world-building the most. With every scene, you really feel like there's a whole other built society within the story and you're being led by a well thought-out plot. It's even clever in that it allows the readers to feel out the world along with the MC so you can really share the bewilderment and wonder of the experience.

Looking forward to reading more!
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