I Don’t Want to Be Loved

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Rihannan Alessin, a queen rotting in prison.

Despaired and without hope, she drank poison and died. But… unbeknownst to her, the deity gave her a second chance at life. She was twelve again. And this time, she would live life differently.

Six years later, she chooses to become Arundell’s queen…

“If you’re asking me to step down from the marriage proposal, I can’t.”

“Marry me and let us divorce after a year.”

And this time, the time limit of their marriage would last a year.

A husband she knew who was different than before… she tried not to love him again, but each time, her heart kept shaking.

Associated Names
One entry per line
IDWTBL
Sarangbadgi Wonhaji Anhneunda
사랑받기 원하지 않는다
Related Series
Please Answer Me (Shared Universe)
Recommendations
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Shadowless Night (8)
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Your Majesty, I Want You (7)
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Latest Release

Date Group Release
07/16/23 Hades House c64
07/16/23 Hades House c63
07/16/23 Hades House c62
07/15/23 Hades House c61
07/05/23 Hades House c60
07/05/23 Hades House c59
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07/04/23 Hades House c56
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07/04/23 Hades House c52
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07/01/23 Hades House c50
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138 Reviews sorted by


Mikaela0310
Mikaela0310 rated it
May 22, 2020
Status: c90
I LOVE THIS NOVEL SO MUCH!!!!.

eventho the FL is being hurt, I like how the ML also get back to the past to follow FL and fix everthing that he ever did.

Hopefully some official side would like to translate this novel also.
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n0cturne
n0cturne
April 27, 2020
Status: c73
Honestly, this is the first novel I've read where two connected people went back in time. The first part of the story was full of heartache and disappointments but now I'm looking forward to their progress as they each correct their mistakes on their own. More please ?
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SamSam
SamSam rated it
April 5, 2020
Status: c51
curious about the story ; seems to be interesting with multiple reincarnations. Nothing to say about the translation, flawless.

But like others readers, I feel chapters are too short, it costs a star too. I totally agree : splitting chapters in a "long" (or "elaborate") story slows down/hinders the pace of the plot/flow - Just like RE, I wait few translated chapters each times to really enjoy the story (MTL is such a blessing but dangerous for my brain ;)). Anyway, it's still very VERY nice to find korean novels well... more>> translated <3

Let pass some releases, just be patient to not miss a nice novel (and hé hé, hot to be) ! <<less
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Losii299
Losii299 rated it
August 24, 2022
Status: Completed
Very angsty to say the least. Don't except anything special from both of the leads. I cant handle angst unless the translation is finished and waiting was a good call. And so few thoughts about this novel

  • Spoiler
    • If only ML wasn't such a jacka$$ in bed he could have been much better character. Whether it was that bloodline that his mother kept talking about or not, the way he releases his frustration was huge red flag. His communication skill and problem solving skill suckd a$$ considering he was the king. On one hand he fought with his mother and on the other hand he never really did any background check on the person he loved??? Even based on suspicion he should have looked into things more thoroughly. Like isn't that the most basic thing to do considering that he have feelings for her and her having a power as queen. But at least this character learned things the hard way and paid enough price. The more he fkd up the more he ended up in even more fked up situation. I think his trauma is far worse than FLs in their second life.
    • His mother was very complex character. The way she pretty much gaslighted her son into thinking everything was his fault was very disturbing. I thought she was pretty decent character at some point but as the past revealed one by one I understood that she was batsh*t crazy about power. Her 'love' for her son was as artificial as fake plant. And the horrible part about this was she doesn't even know that herself. She thinks she loves her son and is doing everything for him. When in reality she did everything for herself.
    • The frustrating thing about FL was she pretty much never learned anything or no progress. Be it communication, self reflection, accountability, no progress nothing. She is pretty much the same person at the end of the story. The only thing she thought was how not to looked down upon which is reasonable but was very shallow (writing wise). It could have been interesting if she thought about how things could have been different if she acted different in her first life along the story. Realizing things she could have done as queen, as partner, as goddaughter and such. Just reacted to things when the time comes. And I totally lost it when she left Arundell thinking the royals gonna die in pandemic anyways....... She left Helena to die just like that in that moment. I think she is very lifeless character. Even in her second life she never really tried exploring herself and just lived because she had no reason to die until ML forced his way to progress the plot.
    • Dimis (Rhias cousin, not a distant cousin) love for Rhia was very weird to me as it was never fully explored (no dimi povs at all). There were hints that his love was more than family affection but I honestly hated that. People seemed to like Dimi but as a person who grew up close to my cousins I cannot understand why he fell for Rhia for the life of me. Especially in the 2nd timeline.
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IamAlin
IamAlin rated it
August 1, 2022
Status: Completed
Well, this novel about second chance. Both the ML and FL were reborn. The plot is typical about how ML was being a jerk in previous life with and when he get a second chance, he desperately wants to atone his sins especially towards the FL. Based on my opinion, this ML as a King, made so much of terrible choices and decisions in his first life that makes me wonder how old was he lollll because it was never mentioned his real age 🤔

1. The plot is simple. Is... more>> all misunderstandings because the freaking King and Queen were acting like a hormonal teenager instead of sit and talk to solve their issues. The schemes by the villains were just mehhhh. Not that interesting. 2. There were few supporting characters but nothing memorable about them. They were just there for the plot's sake.

3. ML. He did mistakes and tried his best to atone for his sins. He was a King but one of the weakest King I've ever encounter as compared to other novels. This dude was like so immature, jealous for no reason and his lack of communication and trust that eventually leads to the downfall in his first life. Thank god he did changed and become anda better King/husband. 4. FL. This FL was really pissing me off. She freaking died in her first life and when she was reborn, she just run and did NOTHING. She was a freaking countess for god's sake. I understand that she did not wants to revenge and choose to leave and live a peaceful life but still she was useless. She has a tragic first life and I was really hoping that she will become strong and fight and do something for her country. But she just back away. It was the ML and her cousin that did all the works. She still carried her previous trauma into her second life and the cried and kept on refusing to give chance to the ML to explained himself. Her character is boring and nothing exceptional.

5. Trigger alert : r*pe. In the first life, right from the first night, he already forced himself on her because he thought she betrayed him. And he freaking knew that it caused her so much pain and trauma. Everytime he had s*x with her, there will be no foreplay, and it will caused pain to FL. There were times when she just fainted. The ML will feel guilty the next day when he saw the bruises but he will repeat again his action because he was angry and lost control. And the FL, instead of saying or doing anything she just cried. Like how weak can you be. That's the problem with the character, she did absolute NOTHING and endure it.

The only character I like in these novel were Basil, the King's personal assistant and Dimi, the FL's cousin. I was more interest with their story although it was only little. They actually did quit a wonderful job in keeping the two countries at peace. Without them, both the King and Queen will be long dead. <<less
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Iuningning
Iuningning rated it
July 17, 2022
Status: Completed
As I read several reviews, I came to the conclusion this really isn’t for everyone. Reading this made me feel so much emotion, it was as if my heart was in a rollercoaster ride. Both main characters are flawed. They are nowhere near perfect. Both are traumatized and misunderstood. They sinned and made huge mistakes in their past, especially the ml. Warning that if you’re planning to read this, ML isn’t your typical perfect knight in shining armor. You will hate some of his decisions and even loathe him. However,... more>> as I slowly got to know him through the later chapters and found revelations about their misunderstandings, he genuinely loved and cared for fl, and the journey reading this was, as I said, was a rollercoaster of emotions.

I’ve read and watched similar romance stories in the past like this. This isn’t your typical fluffy love story. They are both humans who are flawed, experienced tragic incidents in their lives and hurt each other deeply because of their decisions and misunderstandings. Now, it is up to them to dwell in the past, forgive and forget each other, or forgive and communicate and fight for what their hearts truly desire. You will feel their frustrations and struggles moving past their trauma but in the end, it is up to them to conquer all of that and accept and COMMUNICATE what they truly feel for each other.

As I was nearing the end, I really thought this would have a tragic ending but I was wrong. I’m glad the main characters are finally happy together and found peace. Such a great ending. Thank you so much to the author and translators. I enjoyed reading this. <<less
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Nekopapaws
Nekopapaws
May 6, 2022
Status: Completed
I know many people complaining about this novel and FL but honestly it is not that bad... the FL is just not typical "i can do it, revenge time, blablabla" suddenly-become-strong FL like in other novel. She is just that gentle, and this is more believable to me that when someone regress and depressed, they can't immediately change things and become OP like other heroine in other revenge theme novel. The theme is never about revenge in this story, it is more like mellow drama and for me, it does... more>> suit my taste.

It is true, the FL was basically doing nothing and ML did all the hard work and effort but in my point of view, it is just like it is.. from the beginning, FL was someone who weak, passive, not confident, added with mistreatment she received from her family and people close to her, it can't be helped if indeed she become that obedient, timid person. On the other hand, ML since beginning did things more actively and it stays like that after regressed. FL is like water and ML is like fire, for me they just completed each other perfectly.

My rating is 4.5/5 for this, what an enjoyable ride! <<less
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chande
chande rated it
April 4, 2022
Status: Completed
So much heartaches and misunderstandings and yet still so sweet at the same time. Well, in fact, the misunderstanding part occupied at least 80% of the story, so yeah, prepare to be frustrated a bit before reading this novel.

I know that the misunderstanding part was necessary since it was the main plot of this novel but I still feel like smacking both MC and ML's heads for their lack of communication. ML chose to hide everything because he didn't want to burden MC but it made her went further away... more>> from him and even costed her and their baby's life in the past life. It didn't improve much in their current life. But when ML was finally ready to tell MC everything, she was too afraid to hear the truth and refused to listen anything that he said. It was near the end of the novel when finally, they had heart to heart talk and cleared their misunderstandings.

I'm happy that after going through so much both in the past and current life, MC and ML finally could get their happily ever after. They really deserved it. <<less
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asif
asif rated it
January 9, 2022
Status: Completed
Introvert/pessimist MC met with cold/wooden ML. That, added with the lack of communication, was the recipe for their tragic end previously.

Their story tells how crucial communication is in any relationship. And how seemingly small misunderstanding will accumulate and you'll find yourself with mountains of tangled up mess when it might be too late.

Even though the plot was full of angst initially, for me, at least it ended satisfactory. I thoroughly enjoyed it.
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Totorocupcake
Totorocupcake rated it
March 31, 2021
Status: Completed
For anyone who is reading the comments to decide weather it's worth reading: it is! I was doubtful too, especially because of the toxic main lead from the comments below BUT it changes. There is more to the story than thr female lead knows. Also we start very early. In other light novels the first chapter is the wedding or engagement etc. This one focuses on the female leads life first. I was not sure if I would like this tbh because I wanted to read romance specifically and it... more>> definitely is worth it. Things in the begging that made me want to drop (for example first wedding night) were explained later on and it’s just very well written for a light novel.

It’s just sad that there is no continuation for it at the moment so I will be looking at other pages. <<less
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luckyneko rated it
March 16, 2021
Status: Completed
Too bad the link is dead.

This was a sweet rebirth story about a couple who misunderstood each other and got a second chance. There is some hanky panky, but it was tastefully written and nothing too over the top.
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Renjiko
Renjiko
October 30, 2020
Status: c176
I gave 5 just to uplift the rating bcs it doesnt deserve its current number. This ones worthy of reading too (actual rate is 4.5)

It'll make you hate, love and curse and cry for the sake of characters but do not judge its quality based on few chapters. Again as I always say on my reviews, DO NOT TRUST those reviewers who gives low rate and neg criticism and yet they only manage to read quarter of the total available number of chapters. This one is worthy. Atleast part... more>> of my top 10 smut-romance so far. (W/ quality of trans, writing and plot) <<less
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mumuxxi
mumuxxi rated it
June 25, 2020
Status: c27
Very promising. Maybe I'll change the rating later after the story is finished, but so far I really like it.

Kudos to the translator, thankyou so much!
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Rosslie
Rosslie
June 2, 2020
Status: c102
Although going back to the past is not new when it comes to korean novel but I like the flow of the story, how the future events changes. It's also refreshing how both ML and FL went back to the past try to undo the misfortune of their lives together. Honestly I already figured much hoe the story will proceed but I'm still looking forward to read the entire story until the end
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axcellekim
axcellekim rated it
May 24, 2020
Status: --
I am really looking forward in the complete translation of this novel. I read the spoilers and I can’t wait to read the whole plot. Regardless of ML’s faults and failures, I can’t deny his love for FL. So, I wish I can properly read the complete translations.
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pandansoda
pandansoda rated it
May 23, 2020
Status: c77
This story has a really good premise and I really like the MC but the ML is just such a poorly written character that its almost painful to read. I can see an attempt at making him multi dimensional but it comes off as abusive and guilt tripping. I think the novel would have done much better if the writer hadn't set up the ML to be such an awful person. It's a shame because the translation, albeit confusing at times, is really good!
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linnil
linnil rated it
May 23, 2020
Status: c91
The intro is similar to Reboot Sienna as I like Reboot Sienna very much so I read this novel.

But I am disappoint Rihannan married a prince with recommend from the mother of the king. The king and his mother is rival/enemy on political level so it making Igor (the king) wary of Rihannan making her relationship with the king a loveless marriage life. There is also possible lover of the king too acting as one of the cause of Rihannan's death in the first timeline. As the story progress, the... more>> end game should still be Igor (the king) in the second timeline too even all those event.

These all look similar to the beginning plot of Reboot Sienna. But I like Sienna more than Rihannan. She too an idiot, a tool, a cannon fodder that die miserably in the first time line. But at least on the second timeline Sienna changed, she know her wrong, acknowledge it and try to change herself. This make me accept that Carl (her husband) reaction to her change too as she is not political inclination to his enemy (the step-mother of the king) anymore.

As for Rihannan, in the second timeline, she herself did not change much, The one who change is Igor (the king). So this is like the slag king's redemption story instead of cannon fodder counter attack story that I like to read. LoL
Spoiler

Igor (the king) remember the event in the first timeline too

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gwenivy639
gwenivy639
May 13, 2020
Status: c82
Overall the plots were nice but the order of it seems confusing. When it comes to the character's growth, it's quite satisfying that Rihannan would do her best to avoid him and ended up being with him. Seeing Igor suffering is quite nice (but it has not activated my sadistic tendecies???). I still want more??? Next time, I want to read Leticia's downfall.
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