Flash Marriage (Jiu Xiao Qi)

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Flash marriage may seem like a trifling matter,

But in fact, a long-term courtship does not necessarily guarantee a happy marriage.

The most important point is –

Meeting the right people at the right time.

A spinster who is desperate to get married met a prospective male at a blind date.

The first sentence: 房事 “consummation ……”

The second sentence: 婚事 “marriage ……”

The third sentence “I’m gay!”

The fourth sentence “Lets get married!”

The fastest “flash marriage” in history is also the year’s most interesting wedding infighting.

Female lead: Guan Xiao Yan, a spinster;

Male lead: Jiang Li, a self-professed “gay”.

In order to get rid of the trouble of going to blind dates, both leads picked up a marriage license in just a few hours after meeting on a blind date. This is the fastest “flash marriage” in history.

Infighting during married life and revolutionary love quietly follows …

Associated Names
One entry per line
Wife, Come Home With Me
老婆,跟我回家吧
Related Series
N/A
Recommendations
First Marriage Then Love (3)
A Slight Smile is Very Charming (2)
Black-Bellied Dad (2)
Reincarnation – Lord is Extremely Hardcore (2)
Marriage Concerto (Small Thing Called Love) (2)
Hunting for a Delicious Wife (After) (1)
Recommendation Lists
  1. Books I have read
  2. Get my Het on
  3. Nosebleeds from heaven - 7
  4. Instant Family
  5. Interesting. Not.

Latest Release

Date Group Release
09/19/18 CatMeme6 ss 3
09/19/18 CatMeme6 ss 2
09/19/18 CatMeme6 ss 1
09/19/18 CatMeme6 epilogue 3
09/19/18 CatMeme6 epilogue 2
09/19/18 CatMeme6 epilogue 1
09/19/18 CatMeme6 c67
09/19/18 CatMeme6 c66
09/19/18 CatMeme6 c65
09/19/18 CatMeme6 c64
09/19/18 CatMeme6 c63
09/19/18 CatMeme6 c62
09/19/18 CatMeme6 c61
09/19/18 CatMeme6 c60
09/19/18 CatMeme6 c59
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24 Reviews sorted by


Bythesea
Bythesea rated it
November 7, 2019
Status: c50
I liked 你不入地狱谁入地狱, and I was in the mood for some more light-hearted romance so I thought I'd take this author's other novels for a spin...

I can't remember the last time I've been this enraged by an author, I'm honestly impressed by how thoroughly this author managed to tick me off. I hate the characters in the novel, hate them so deeply I could choke to death on my own hatred.

First problem, the MC and male lead are just awful in every possibly way. I actually prefer flawed characters, but... more>> not irredeemably terrible characters without a single saving grace, totally complacent with their own awfulness. The characters don't acknowledge their flaws, or if they do, the author lets them indulge in it. I read up to almost the end until I was pissed to the point that I couldn't force myself to finish, not only do the characters not grow or try to overcome their flaws, they get increasingly WORSE. Someone give the author a medal for being able to write character arcs into character circles. The author just spoils her characters to the core and writes negative traits as if they were charms.

The MC is witless, selfish, avaricious, prejudiced, reliant, temperamental, no aspirations, no resolve. I wouldn't have a problem with any of this (the more flawed the character the more room there is for growth) if she acted out of her own volition to improve her situation or had some aspirations outside of romance, but she never attempts to lift a finger to grasp her own happiness and instead just sits and has charity drop by chance onto her lap and resolve all her problems. For the love of GOD, get a life, or at least SHOW some signs of life, a vegetable would have been better than this MC.

The male lead is basically the opposite matching set to the MC and yet somehow STILL manages to have less personality than a cardboard cutout. Heavy-handed, demanding, insipid, jealous, manipulative; an annoyingly stifling presence, so dull he weighs down the story (and the MC) like a giant, immovable rock. Does he deserve the mc? No. Does the MC deserve him? Also no... No man or woman deserves to be subjected to these two insufferable morons... which I guess actually makes them a perfect couple...?

On the contrary, I enjoy the second male lead a lot (relative to the other characters anyways), he's a fun dude with an interesting personality, the biggest misfortune in his life is that he had to meet the MC. Guy was living a full life when the author basically railroaded him into a miserable, inescapable one-sided love that goes against all his core principles. Man, how I wish the author would just put the guy out of his misery, death is better than what he got. He's the most multifaceted character despite his low screen time. He has some good lines, I find myself agreeing with him: if someone plays you then you play them right back, there's no need to be so reserved when it comes to relationships, just enjoy it. Of course the author depicts it negatively, but I don't see a problem with his flirtations or history with women who were mutually having a casual fling with him. He quit doing all that when he fell for the MC anyways, his quick resolve and willingness to reform his lifestyle deserves some praise. But the MC being the most tedious and monotonous character I've ever had the displeasure of reading, guy lost the race before he even started running. Sadly, he gets more and more boring as the story goes on, his personality is basically brutally mu*dered after he falls for the MC, almost as if her boring is contagious... or perhaps the empty vacuum that is her soul simply slowly s**ked the vitality out of him. Obviously the author doesn't spare him, he only exists to offset the main couple, the MC won't give him a second glance, his only purpose is to push the main couple closer, no chance of getting any resolution to his character arc, author's too busy writing about the most boring, unromantic couple in the world.

Second problem is how the author, and by extension the the MC, depicts the lgbtq community. For f*cks sake it's the 21st century, gays don't exist so women can fetishize them with top/bottom nonsense. Not only does the MC call gays 'pe*verts' and depict them as degenerates, she acts as if gays will naturally have s*x with any random guy. The MC on multiple occasions asks the male lead to r*pe someone else or offers to let him assault the second male lead (how lightly the author treats r*pe is another issue). The author also casually uses being gay as an excuse for misogyny. No, gay people aren't disgusted by women, just as lesbians don't categorically hate men, and being gay is not something people just 'choose' to (or to not) be. The male lead receives some emotional damage from an ex-girlfriend, starts to hate women, and decides that since he hates women he must be gay (but is disgusted by his boyfriend's body). Dude's a moron. MC's a moron. Author's a moron.

Third problem, and this is the problem that made me drop the story,
Spoiler

both male leads attempt to r*pe the MC on the same day. To make it worse the male lead watches the MC almost get r*ped the first time to test if she would reject the other lead (is this guy a sociopath?), because yelling and struggling is apparently not enough of an rejection. Then he forces himself on her because she would NEVER reject him even if she thinks he's gay and has shown no romantic interest in him right? /s. The worst part is the way the author uses the attempted assaults to write fanservice. Then, the the MC being the soulless blow-up doll that she is, forgives and believes him when he says 'It's just a joke, I'm gay, we cool?'. If she used her last goddamn brain cell for one moment after being almost r*ped twice she should have severed her relationship with those two, but she's become so emotionally reliant on the male lead at this point she probably couldn't survive on her own (seriously, for your own sake, get a life).

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Bloodwolf466
Bloodwolf466 rated it
June 24, 2019
Status: --
This novel just left a bitter taste in my mouth the entire time. I feel like all we see the ML do is bring the protagonist down, demeaning her and destroying any self confidence she has at every moment. The FL shows slight semblances of intelligence sometimes, but for the vast majority of the novel the author just left her with an endless void for a brain. We see him tear off her wings and tie him to her by manipulating her job, friends, and family while she does nothing... more>> other than get vaguely annoyed. EVERY time. If she comes up with a reasonable argument to be mad (like it should be hard with the way he treats her) then it’s because someone else thought of it.
Spoiler

She nearly gets r*ped TWICE on the same day, and that turns into absolutely nothing.

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I can’t handle this FL with no brain, backbone, or self worth. <<less
25 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Sharn
Sharn rated it
March 25, 2020
Status: c38
I am writing my first review for the sake of readers who want to read this in the future. Please, DON’T waste your time. This series sucks, it doesn’t deserve the 4.1 rating. Author wrote things whatever they desired, with a literature style and thoughts of elementary kids; ML whose behaviors are questionable, second ML who acts affectional toward FL out of nowhere (so marysue ew), messy plotline that leads to nowhere and no logic.

I am just so mad having to spend my precious time on this.
19 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Raksha
Raksha rated it
October 22, 2017
Status: Completed
Being a bit s*upid is cute. But a s*upid 27-year old MC is annoying. Her personality is very likable and fun. But the author making her too s*upid became too annoying later on. She's also weak-willed when it comes to her husband. She may have been fighting back but the author did not gave her any chance to win at all. This kind of MCs are the most annoying. Like SA or Maid-sama. Plus the ML is also too diabolical. Leaving the MC believing that he really is gay and... more>> have a boyfriend is too... evil. Seriously, what are you doing author? <<less
18 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Fathom
Fathom rated it
November 8, 2015
Status: --
Absolutely hilarious! I love the MC and her snarky relationships with everyone. Up to ch 19 there isn't any romantic feelings from the MC, instead it's all about the MC trying to one up her husband, mother, BFF, and gaming friend. Instead she always fails miserably. It's a great comedic day in the life of a 28 year old virg*n with a low IQ.
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earlgreyt
earlgreyt rated it
October 14, 2018
Status: Completed
Overall cute novel in tr*shy romance, slice-of-life-ish. MC is a pretty foolish but straightforward gal.

Even though she is teased to be super average, not-good-looking, etc, her personality still attracted handsome men. Although this trope was overdone, the oneshot moments looking through the men's eyes gave a marginally believable reason as to how they each fell for her.

There were some (shocking) emotional moments between the ML and the MC. Both had been hurt in the past, so it was somewhat touching to see how they struggled with that.

Other issues aside (yes... more>> there are a lot, but glossed over for comedy) , it would be really nice to read just ONE story where the MC is smarter than the ML in a C-novel.

This will never happen, unfortunately (might be a cultural thing??). Instead, we have an overabundance of 'dumb-but-purehearted' MCs who are pretty much always under the ML's thumb.

(And it would be nice if the MC would stop putting herself down in her thoughts too.)

I'm really starting to appreciate K-novels more now... <<less
11 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Klaruza
Klaruza rated it
June 2, 2018
Status: Completed
Actually I finish this story from wattpad... (Yes someone translate is till the end?) thanks to @CatMeme6

Overall I really like all the lead, the MC although dumb she's so loyal like puppies

And the ML is decent and cute (if jealous)

The plot is also clear, both of them had a bad past but eventually will overcome it

You should try it out. I really enjoy it till the end ?
9 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Pezwitch
Pezwitch rated it
April 9, 2021
Status: c50
If I could give this zero stars I would

This novel infuriated me so many times and I tried to stick with it but
Spoiler

After both men who “loved” FL tried to r*pe her on the same day

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I dropped it

It is also fetishizes LGBTQ, which I dislike
7 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
fltstrt
fltstrt rated it
February 23, 2019
Status: Completed
Story: 3.5/5

You see, I am familiar w the author's works. I more or less understand and enjoy her humour. However, halfway through the story I was ready for it to end. A large part could be due to the way the story was being translated.

Which brings to my next point below. Before committing to this story, pls be aware that the story changed hands 3 times. TL: 2/5 (Pratii c1-28), 4/5 (baixingheiyue c29-43), 5/5 (catmeme6 c44-68)

I realised belatedly that Translator of c1-28, Pratii @booksmovieandbeyond does not in fact understand... more>> Chinese at all. You can read more about her translating methodology at the beginning of c19.1.

Naturally do not expect her piece to be an accurate transliteration of the original. Pratii took many liberaties as she saw fit (for better, or for worst) and she calls it her very own rendition of the story.

While readable and perhaps a slight upgrade from a MTL story.. It doesn't change the fact that many jokes aren't reflected well. The nuanced comedic angle which was what I came for, is unfortunately lost/butchered in translation. It was honestly quite excruciating to trudge though c1-28 that houses a graveyard of grammar mistakes and incorrect usage of vocab. <<less
6 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Meisheme
Meisheme rated it
December 10, 2020
Status: Completed
  1. This is my 3rd time reading this novel
  2. I think that it’s well written. A story of a couple who were traumatised by their previous experiences and finding someone who can open their hearts
  3. I don’t understand why there are many negative reviews regarding this novel. It’s well written and well translated.
4 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
cutecatpawn
cutecatpawn rated it
January 31, 2020
Status: --
I skip this novel so many time after read many bad comment. Fortunately, I consider try to read it.. It's so goooooood.. Fluffy and romantic. The ending is satisfying..
4 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Lily.rose
Lily.rose rated it
May 14, 2023
Status: Completed
Spoiler

Hated the ML. He's misogynistic, , narcissistic, arrogant, and a complete a**hole. I was waiting for him to get better and find out why he was pretending to be gay. Turns out, he's nothing but imbecile. Hated all women because his gf broke up with him. Convinced himself he was gay even though he felt NO attraction towards men. For thinking he has high IQ, he made the s*upidest decision.

also hated how he belittled the FL at every turn. Even when it was unnecessary. I enjoy a black belly ML. I enjoy banter. But I don't enjoy verbal abuse. He was verbally abusing her, chipping away at her confidence, giving her unsolicited and wrong advice about "forgiving her dad" even though that man abandoned his family. ML is atrocious and this story is not a romance.

FL was dumb and ditzy. But the 2 stars are for her and the translator. Even though FL had like two brain cells, at least she had a honest way of life.

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2 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
xuexin
xuexin rated it
November 5, 2019
Status: Completed
Basically the story is about two individuals who don't necessarily want to get married, but were forced into the situation due to their age and the Chinese belief of being "leftovers". ML was hurt in the past and decided to be gay, while FL has low self-esteem because of her past. It's a story about character development, with both facing and healing the scars of their past in order to be able to love.

FL has a lot of love interest that's for sure. I'm not going to lie, somewhere deep... more>> in my heart I actually wanted the FL to end up with the 2nd ML and not the actual ML. Part of me wished that the gay ML was really gay. <<less
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silent hobby
silent hobby rated it
September 24, 2018
Status: ss 3
Although this novel a bit weird but it is an enjoyable novel. First of all, the translator was doing wonderful job.

The Female MC is s*upid but in a cute way. The main couple has some conflicts and crisis but they manage to solve them nicely.

If you like modern fluffy romance, this novel is a great choice and I enjoy this reading journey.
2 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Arnissan
Arnissan rated it
July 15, 2016
Status: c28 part3
Even though it's full of chinese romcom tropes, it's still enjoyable.
2 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Leikr_ish bish
Leikr_ish bish rated it
January 4, 2022
Status: --
I agree with the other reviewer saying that this novel "fetishizes LGBTQ" whole reason of the ML being gay is s*upid af! Being gay is not that superficial. Sigh I can't even! It didn't sit well with me that under the guise of caring for someone you would degrade them like calling them idiot or s*upid every damn time, also assault and act of lasciviousness under the guise of office romance should not be mistaken as cute or sexy. I actually thought that this was cute at first, I got... more>> to chapter 40 and I thought that I was manipulated to think that interactions between the male and female leads on this one are cute or sweet. When I thought about it that the MC not sleeping alone and her abandonment issue is just glossed over kindof deux ex machina for the whole plot to get both mc/ML together leaves a repulsive taste in my mouth. I can pretty much put up with anything CN novel throws at me but not this one. This could've been a really good sweet novel had it been handled with a lot of thought and sensitivity. <<less
1 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
missqaseh
missqaseh
June 28, 2019
Status: Completed
I'm quiet satisfied with this novel. Fun story line, happy ending.. It would be better if the are side story of He Zi and Han Xiao together and also Wang Kai POV
1 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
SublimiSomnium
SublimiSomnium rated it
September 21, 2018
Status: --
This is such a strange novel. First of all, I dislike novels with multiple love interests, ditzy heroines, and abusive MLs. However, this novel has all three and I've somehow managed to read every chapter - and enjoy them!

The ultimate saving grace for me was the heroine's narrative. I didn't feel like she was particularly s*upid as she is portrayed. In fact, there were several instances where her intellect was effectively demonstrated. It's more like she is too straightforward and petty. I love how these characteristics of hers are shown... more>> to be both her strengths and her weaknesses. She is too straightforward so she is too trusting of the romantic interests when they deny their romantic interest in her, but at the same time it allows her to be honest (sometimes painfully) and to honestly express herself.

As for her pettiness, it is obviously a weakness because it gets her in trouble (a lot). But it is her strength because it is amusing (both for readers and the romantic interests). It also provides motivation for her to try and improve herself (even if ultimately it is so she can one-up somebody). However, although she is consistently petty more often than not she usually gives up on it and just tries to take care of herself.

Another reason I probably stuck through this story is that I wanted to know that she would be alright. I appreciate that the author did not force feed us a stereotypical romance where an OP man falls in love with a ditzy cute girl-next-door. However, it would be nice to at least like some of the romantic interests! Instead, I found myself frequently wanting to scold them like the children they act like and was not in the least bit attracted to any of them, I just wanted to get to the end to know that she wouldn't keep being abused... <<less
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mshh
mshh rated it
March 25, 2018
Status: Completed
The story is interesting and comical. An easy light-heart read. No angst or drama. I like this author and her novels thus far has not disappoint.

...
Spoiler

with a dense MC being fooled by her husband who pretended to be gay. Their interactions are funny as he tries to tell her subtly his feelings that developed later. ML seems to have a tsundere personality?

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shouahang58
shouahang58 rated it
August 22, 2017
Status: Completed
I was very hesitant to read this but surprisingly I like this novel more than I thought I would.

EDIT:

I somewhat wish that the female lead was a bit smarter, cause the male lead always a step above her which get annoying after seeing this repeatedly through out the novel.
1 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
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