For instance, there's a point in the story where Jiyu goes missing (he's locked up by one of his exes), and while the story briefly has Siqi tell Jiyu how worried he's been when the other returns, it's then... never mentioned again. Almost as if the entire event had never happened. While Jiyu never actually tells Siqi the real reason why he was missing, it still felt as if Siqi should be a bit more... I don't know? Anxious afterwards? Because what if Jiyu goes missing again? Or maybe even question Jiyu a bit more about the real reason because it's obvious that Jiyu is not telling the full truth. But, nope, nothing.

We also never learn anything about Siqi's personal life outside of Jiyu. I mean, Siqi is a doctor for pete's sake! Yet, he's able to spend so much time caring about Jiyu? (And clearly at the expense of his other patients too). That's not to mention that Siqi is also Jiyu's primary physician as well... Man, the ethics behind that is... shaky. And even putting that aside, doctors are actually usually greatly discouraged from being the doctors for their loved ones because it's not good for the mental health of the doctor in question (since they're so close to their patients, so they're less able to make unbiased judgment calls). The story never touches on this. Because the author doesn't really seem to give a sh*t about Siqi's mental state.

I did laugh out loud (while also wanting to slap him a good one) at the end when he was baffled why his love wasn't reciprocated despite how long he waited when he has never even confessed to Jiyu. Did he think Jiyu was, what, telepathic or something? Literal kid logic right here.

But I did feel sort of sorry for him, since he's the only one that Jiyu blatantly lies to about the cancer at the end. It really drove home how the two could've never worked out, since Jiyu lies to him "for his own good" ([insert eye-roll]), while Erxin can't communicate for his life.

There was a brief stint where Jiyu is locked up in the Qiao estate by Qiao Lang, but that was the most... underwhelming house arrest I've ever read. Qiao Lang comes across Jiyu arguing with He Li and offers to take Jiyu home -- Jiyu agrees because anything is better than He Li (I agree) -- and then Qiao Lang just... drives to his house and refuses to let Jiyu leave. It's a shitty move, but Jiyu barely even freaks out which is like... are the readers supposed to feel something about this when the MC himself doesn't seem to?

And what was Qiao Lang even thinking? I don't think someone will magically fall back in love with you if you stop them from leaving your house until they do, bro... But, again, the author isn't really interested in her characters' motivations, more in the drama it can create. So once again we have a character who's a complete cipher, with no logic or interiority at all.

He refers to Jiyu as a "pet" and then gets another pet that he flaunts in front of Jiyu all the time, and then when Jiyu requests to leave the relationship since He Li clearly doesn't like him, He Li then threatens to kill him?? Like, He Li is so over-the-top that he actually crosses the line from "scummy scum" to "hilarious clown", and I legit couldn't stop laughing everytime he appeared because he was the most clueless ML ever.

He consistently misinterprets Jiyu's words and actions, and he's also the only one who had no clue that Jiyu was actually the Pei family's (estranged) young master. He Li is so oblivious to everything that he feels like a (completely unintentional) running gag. Like, how did Jiyu fall in love with him in the first place? This guy probably doesn't even know how to use a can opener omg!

So Lu Qingfan is Jiyu's first love and adoptive brother, and he's also unfortunately given the most screentime of the MLs (yes, even including Meng Siqi) and also the most interiority for whatever reason.

In other words, his reason for rejecting Jiyu's love actually makes sense. The sense of inferiority he felt in the Pei family, the whispered judgment of his classmates, and his ambition actually all tie together really neatly and act as pretty good explanations for his behavior. Like, Qingfan actually feels like a legit human being instead of a cardboard cutout.

It's just too bad that he's pretty scummy, consistently treats Jiyu badly (until the end), and acts self-righteous as if he was in the right all along.

Like, in a better story, Qingfan would've been a pretty interesting antagonist that the readers love to hate, or that the readers could sympathize with while still not condoning his actions. But here? It just feels like he should've been the ML -- but then the author changed her mind because she had some morals and knew that Jiyu should end up with someone nice (except she misplaced nice with "no personality").

This also makes me kind of glad that the author never finished the extras? Because from the first chapter posted, it seemed that an alternate universe version might've actually have had Qingfan as an ML, and I really don't want him as an ML. I don't like him, but he's really the only legitimate human being in this whole farce, so it feels almost inevitable.

Especially, our last chosen ML among the 5 ML, he’s the least realistic of them all. He’s seems like a gentle person and concerned over MC but it seems to me like he’s not concerned enough, not from his heart at least. He seems so fake, honestly his entire being is so fake in this story lol. I don’t know why but I have this feelings when reading about him.

All I can say is the novel itself is really good and it was similar to A Decade of Deep Love which is my cup of tea but always finding myself burst into tears. I find the ending quite satisfying because the MC has grown tired of waiting for his loved ones since he was young until his adulthood and believing that sacrificing can found him, true love. But it was really sad when he finally found the person who can truly love him which is the ML, they found each other when the MC only has half-year/one year left to live. The only thing that I'm not satisfied with is there are no other chapters, I honestly want to read the POV's of the other characters when the MC died (I WANT THEIR REGRETS!), I'm really sad for the ML : (.

MC loved the 1st ML (his adoptive older brother) for 10 years and waited for him for so long only to be told that he needed to stop dreaming and wake up, when obviously the ML was in love with him, but bc he felt inferior to the MC he acted arrogant and cruel towards him.

MC then studied abroad in England and happened to pick up the 2nd ML off the streets where the ML takes advantage of the mc's kindness and somehow returns to China only to abandon the MC for his s*upid revenge. By this time the MC had cut ties with his family to be with the 2nd ml, but bc the 2nd ML selfishly abandoned him, he was left on the streets.

MC then meets the 3rd ML while he works as a waiter in a club. The 3rd ML was the cruelest, he first treated the MC with care in the beginning, but during those 4 years of the MC hoping to be loved affectionately, he was instead cheated on, mentally abused, and kept as a pet to play with.

Finally the MC, meets the wonderful and kind 4th ml, a doctor. He is the true ml! MC meets him at the hospital where he is diagnosed with cancer and only has about 6 months to a year to live. MC gives up on living. In his entire life he just wanted to have a loving relationship like his parents, but chose all the wrong people to love. The ML saves him from giving up his life and persuades him to get treatment to live longer. MC later finds out the the ML has been on love with him ever since they were children and he cries tears of joy. I only wish there were more fluffy stories of these two.

Tho I wish MC can finally be happy with Meng SiQi....... still he can't win his cancer. It broke my heart.