Cry, Even Better if you Beg


Links are NOT allowed. Format your description nicely so people can easily read them. Please use proper spacing and paragraphs.

The Herhardt household’s masterpiece.

The young owner of a heaven-like place called Arvis.

The beautiful bird slaughterer.

Matthias von Herhardt.

His perfect life- completely swallowed, crushed, and shaken-

by his lovely bird.

Leyla Lewellin.

Cut, locked, and tamed her wings.

In order to keep Leyla Lewellin in custody, Matthias did not hesitate in his actions.

Because he did not hesitate, he did not regret.

Because he did not regret, he did not reflect.

Because he did not reflect, he did not apologize.

When his beautiful bird, Leyla Lewellin, opened her cage and flew away, Matthias decided.

“If I am to lose her forever and can’t get her back, I’d rather kill her.”

Associated Names
One entry per line
울어봐, 빌어도 좋고
Related Series
His Canary (2)
Even If It’s Not Love (2)
Flowers Are Bait (2)
Sweet Villain (2)
Doberman (2)
Swallow One’s Breath (2)
Recommendation Lists
  1. Love me some Crazy Male Leads
  3. MLs who carried their novels
  4. why are we here? just to suffer?
  5. Dark Romance

Latest Release

Date Group Release
09/17/22 woopread translations c138
09/14/22 woopread translations c137
09/13/22 woopread translations c136
09/08/22 woopread translations c135
09/07/22 woopread translations c134
09/06/22 woopread translations c133
09/05/22 woopread translations c132
08/29/22 woopread translations c131
08/06/22 woopread translations c130
08/04/22 woopread translations c129
08/03/22 woopread translations c128
07/29/22 woopread translations c127
07/28/22 woopread translations c126
07/26/22 woopread translations c125
07/26/22 woopread translations c124
Go to Page...
Go to Page...
35 Reviews

New Yujian
Sep 21, 2022
Status: c138
First of all, thank you author - nim and translator -nim for this very intriguing Knovel. Aside form the novel itself, I love its main cover which has a very interesting photo and its title is very catchy to me.

Okay, this novel is very entertaining in its 3/4 parts and its very frustrating in the rest of its 1/4 parts, not ended though yet.

The two main characters have a very different background. They don't have any chance to collide with each others. Their worlds are just so paralleled not until... more>> the ML, the Duke, Matthias made it happened to make the parallel line to intersect with the world of Leyla, the free bird, the MC. Ahhh, so much angst, so much emotional abuses, so much emotional threats, but at the end of the road, the ML has given up his obsession towards the MC. He freed her based on what happened in Ch138 but who knows what shall happen in the next future chapters.

If you are not ready to be emotionally battered and can't handle the emotional abuses of an ML, then don't try to read this, because, in your screwed perspective, you will hate the ML till the ends of the earth because of his manipulation towards the MC. Since I love having an ML who is very yandere in emotional abuses but not physically, I am very interested to the ML. <<less
1 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
New AnimeBerry
Sep 08, 2022
Status: --
Its a 3.5 stars for me

This novel is really intriguing. I don't quite like it but at the same time it's fascinating and I want to know what's coming next.

The ML is a real piece of work. You know those Villain protagonist stories where the MC is your usual hero character with a bad reputation? Yeah well this ML actually has the callings of a real villain. It's almost discomforting how he behaves, like he's unhinged behind that fine gentlemanly demeanor. And I like how the fiancée wasn't just given... more>> an antagonistic two dimensional character just to hate on. The characters might be nasty but they written well and they grap your interest.

This is not fluffy nor heartwarming but it's worth a try <<less
2 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Aug 05, 2020
Status: c3
Literally know this is going to be an absolute favorite of mine after only 3 chapters, yup it's that great of a setup, translation and potential. Much Thanks to the translator for her hard work!
25 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Aug 15, 2020
Status: c15
Same as akane09! The translation is really good!!


plot wise so far I can’t accept it if Matthias is ML. He’s rude and he totally doesn’t respect Leyla. The only redeeming fact about him is the fact that he’s p good looking but his personality is total shit. There’s a way to flirtatiously tease someone without making the person feel like total tr*sh but he doesn’t know how to do that.

21 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Aug 11, 2020
Status: c20
Wow! This review is primarily for the translator. The story is easy to follow and the translations are regularly updated. I feel spoiled. Thank you for your wonderful work. It's appreciated and enjoyed!

As for the story, I'm not too far into it but I'm already hooked. I'm a sucker for the yandere ML stories and this one doesn't look like it's going to disappoint.
16 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Jan 13, 2021
Status: c21
dropped it at chapter 21. props to the translator for translating it very well! I really, really, reaaaaaaaaally tried hard to get into it, but I just couldn't bring myself to condone any of the bullying the poor MC has to submit herself to - even if it's for plot purposes urgh... also can't bring myself to feel any sympathies for the ML, he speaks like an a**hole, behaves like an a**hole, is an a**hole. I don't think I can hold on for so long to see him unravel for... more>> the MC either, so... yep dropped it. that's just my two cents though, so everyone else reading it, have fun! <<less
15 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Sep 27, 2021
Status: Completed
I just finished reading this novel and all I have to say is...I am so unsatisfied. The depth of sorrow and desperation to escape that the MC has is so high that for a moment..I thought I was actually feeling these emotions. At one point I didn't think it was possible for MC to have a happy ending as she kept facing impossible situations. The novel does end with a happy ending but to me it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.

Why is it that every Korean novel I... more>> read, the ML is so awful... it's to the point of insanity.

If you decide to read this, make sure you get your tissues ready once you hit the halfway point of this novel. I should have read the tags carefully because now I'm gonna need to detox heavily after finishing this. <<less
11 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Mar 18, 2021
Status: --
I'm reading the MTL version of this novel so I was having a lack of comprehension for this one. But I will be honest with my review.

The title itself is a proof that this is a drama. But when you read it the phase is just hmmm... Just average feel. It's like when you read your typical historical english romance novel. That's where am I getting on this one.

The story started when the FL Leila/Leyla been adopted by his far relative uncle Bill. And how she wants to be a... more>> good daughter figure to his uncle. But due to some coincidence he always get entangled with the ML Matthias or Matthius in the MTL version.

I will warn you on this one because the ML has a case of bullying the FL so much. As the title itself. He always did something bad to the FL because he wants to see a reaction from her. And that is to make her cry resulted to bullying and also sexual assault.


He felt an attraction to the FL. Sexual attraction that he wants to claim her so badly.


The female lead wants to avoid the ML so much but the ML itself don't want to stop and his making a round on the FL.

Actually the FL is mature and a fighter even at a young age. And she is also a lovable and adorable character. Maybe the reason I'm still reading it until now.

ML have a crappy personality. He is not just a perfectionist but also has a case of obsession towards our FL. This results to our FL being suffocated already. The ML is also hot headed and he is the type that 'whatever it is, I get it' guy. The most despicable type of personality. Like I'm already turn off so badly.

I agree with other who review this. I want the ML to crumble and beg our FL.

Spoiler below read at your own risk.


I read some few chapters accidentally and it has mature content. And FL being pregnant and running away.


All and all I give this 3 stars. I'm still not finish I'm still on chapter 60 or 64. Not so sure lol. But this rating will be enough because I'm still not finish.

If you want a roller coaster ride of feels. This story will be good for you. Like you will be totally gets frustrated so badly and pity the FL lots of times. Why ML do this and that. Why! Wanna kill that jerk already lol.

P.S I really recommend this if you read the story whole I guess. Because if you read it and look forward for every update the feels of the story will be gone. So full story reading is better on my opinion. <<less
9 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Mar 29, 2022
Status: --
Brilliantly translated but terribly written. I am a total simp for a psycho/over the top handers ML, BUT THIS GUY IS A JERK. I was really disturbed by his callous treatment of the FL, it felt like he didn't really like her at all. While the FL wasn't the sharpest tool in the she's, she was a sweet girl who I actually found myself liking a lot, which made the whole story.... just bad. It bothered me. He felt so petty, and there wasn't anything about him that was actually... more>> cool or worth smiling for. AND I LIKE YANDERE/PSYCHO TYPE MLS. If youre gonna be a bad guy at least be a big villain or have a personality. Like... his main character trait was honest to god f*ckery and jerkiness. Not cool. Personally, I would recommend a different psycho ML story, like maybe "I Lost the Leash of the Yandere ML" or "I Became The Villain's Pendant". At least the Male Lead doesn't feel like a privileged a**hole using his position to f*ck with a naive child. <<less
7 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Nov 25, 2021
Status: c1 part1
Ooooooh shit!!! It's been a while since I've felt such thrill!!! Such a need to keep up with a novel!!! The psycho ML, the poor FL! I love it!!! I feel like he's going to kill our poor "soon-to-be-doc"... Who knows! He's a psycho after all, so who knows what the author will say he'll do.

I had to come back to update my previous post... it's with a heavy heart that... ... more>>

I couldn't finish this story. Gave up after the FL indecisive behavior. It's ridiculous how dumb she is. I drew out my own conclusion of what the next chapters would possibly be about, moved this novel to my unwanted section, and moved on with my life. Like sealing off a bad memory after waking up from a drunken stupor... you just don't want to recall it.



clearly the FL is a peanut brain, because I cannot fantom the thought of someone going through so much shit! Yet, being so s*upid. I mean, she needs to suffer more! I feel no compassion for her after a few chapters in. As humans, what sets us apart from animals; among many other factors, is the ability to reason... and THAT ability, seems to be something the FL never acquired.

7 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Oct 28, 2021
Status: c55
I absolutely love this novel. And I love all three main characters but.. Obviously I love Matthias the most. He is kinda crazy but he is just so interesting. I can think about the reasons behind his actions all day long.

And the translation is SO good! The best that I have read so far. The plot is so well written and emotions well described. This is definitely my most favourite novel of recent times.

Please suggest similar novels if there's any :))
7 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Oct 15, 2021
Status: c1 part1
This novel is absolutely one of my favourite korean novel like woooowww. The plot is well written and the emotions are overflowing. A lot of readers seems to hate the ml, and sure because of that they end up giving this masterpiece a low rating that's why I decided to make an account and give this a 5 star rating. It's a good read, definitely recommend this.
6 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Nov 12, 2021
Status: c26
The story is well written and easy to get into. It’s also very enjoyable, and I never get bored reading this. The translations are also really professional. Whoever did the translating did a really good job!

The female lead is really likeable, even though she isn’t fantastic. She isn’t annoying and she isn’t too dumb. If you don’t like characters that cry a lot you might not like her, but I think it’s realistic that she would cry in her situations.

The male lead doesn’t just have sadistic tendencies, he’s actually evil.... more>> He does everything he can to make the female lead cry, and just treats her like shit. The female lead deserves so much better than him, and I honestly can’t imagine how she’s going to fall in love with him, because so far the only way he have made her heart beat is because of fear.

Even if I gave it a high rating I can see why others gave it a low rating. This might not be for evryone. <<less
5 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Aug 20, 2022
Status: c57

My rating has nothing to do with the author or translators. I in all honesty respect and value their efforts. My rating is purely based on what I felt while reading and I haven't even completed the story, though I read the last chapter (ch 130 so far) as I could not take it anymore.

I was looking for a story similar to Lemonade by Nina Pennacchi and someone recommended this one. I DNFed after reading 56 chapters and few random chapters and last chapter (ch 130 so far). I... more>> felt depressed and melancholic but not in a good emotional detox-will see silver lining shortly kind of way, but in a way where I felt claustrophobic and oxygen-deprived with darkness all around me and no hope to escape. I do indulge in these emotions from time to time by reading about such characters but I also look forward to their transition towards healing and ultimately happiness. But the MCs of this book cannot gloss over the events that happened between them and make me believe in their "HEA".

This story spans out roughly over a period of 10 years. It starts when FL is 12 and ML is 18. Actual interactions between them take place when FL has turned 18. ML is characterized as an extreme Yandere (psychotic obsessive kinds). To me it felt like he was jaded and bored with his life. He was born into wealth and never had to desire for anything. He just goes about performing his duties and reacting to people and situations like he's expected to do. He does not have a tragic backstory except that he loses his father at a young age of 12. He has a loving family and has his life perfectly cut out for him. On the other hand FL has a tragic childhood. She becomes an orphan at a young age and gets subjected to neglect, mental and physical abuse, poverty, hunger, abandonment etc. She ends up at her uncle's place at the age of 12. Uncle happens to be a gardener working at ML's estate.

ML finds FL's social and financial status a thing to be mocked at and gets a kick out of bullying her. His bullying is so intense sometimes that I feared for her safety and life. Mind you we haven't even reached 30% of the book and more bullying is yet to come. Now ML desires FL and makes her his mistress through blackmail. She hates herself for becoming one but also suffers body-betraying syndrome from time to time. ML know how much that hurts her but because of his social standing cannot think of marrying her. Him dishonoring his "love interest" like that for the sake of some title and wealth felt cowardly and distasteful. Also there's war setting at around 75% of the book.

Finally after getting a fair idea of how events turned out I jumped to the last chapter. In the last chapter I got to know that FL is pregnant with ML's child. FL tells ML with all seriousness how much she hates and detests him and does not want to be with him. ML as usual blackmails her by threatening to take away their unborn child to make her stay with him. FL is so exhausted at this point from her pregnancy, war around, losing her uncle to war, almost scared of losing her only friend that she falls into a restless sleep with tears pouring out. ML licks her tears and revels in her despair and thinks to himself "Her tears still tasted like heaven." And that my friends is the last line of the book. I mean I could never in a million years root for such toxicity. I felt so sad for the FL. This story reminded me of how unfair and unjust life is to some people. It breaks my heart to think about girls and women who go through such ordeals in real life.

This book totally lives up to its title. I will only recommend this book to those readers who are okay without an actual HEA because there is none. If you are looking for a trope where you want to warm up to the ML eventually, this story is not for you. I found Matthias unlikeable, insecure and evil even until the end of the story. He is not well-adjusted and seriously needs a therapist to help him figure out how to deal with his feelings and emotions maturely. These qualities are not attractive to me in a ML. I need to either have a crush on my MLs or at least feel some kind of buddy-ship with them to root for them. Second ML is the one with actual likeable qualities.

In my imagination FL either kills herself or ML under extreme duress. What I actually like to imagine is that FL kills ML and starts a decent life with second ML.

I read few books where ML commits super horrible things but turns a new leaf for FL and FL is actually happy by the end of the story.

1. Virtue and Vanity by Astrid Jane Ray (ML r**** FL on wedding night and grovels like no other ML out there. This book is in FL's POV. Do check out author's Wattpad for ML's POV called Strings Attached after you have read the book)

2. Monster by Franchetta Phal

3. Resurrect by Astrid Jane Ray

4. The Flesh and the Devil by Teresa Denys

5. Of course I will include Lemonade by Nina Pennacchi

6. His Little Bird series by TheWanderer'sWanderingDaughter - It's a four-part Dramione fanfic with loads of non-con and other forms of torture. Fourth part is still ongoing. I read it on archiveofourown or a03 site.

Thanks for reading!!! <<less
4 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Apr 17, 2022
Status: c87
I have been reading this translated version for quiet awhile but I have seen that the translator is adding up the scenes?? That even author hasn't written....

Adding up scenes would make this a fanfic.

The raws are easily available so readers can compare it or ask any other translator whom you know and ask them to compare it for you. It's a good novel but it would be better if the translator does not add scenes which were not written by the author and translate the lines close to the raws.

Other... more>> than that this novel extremely beautiful, what I love about this novel is the female lead, I really love how she handles the situation and is logical. <<less
4 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Oct 23, 2020
Status: --
The ambiance in the story is really good. About the main characters...

... more>>

I really like Leyla. She is naive, but not dumb. She loves birds and flowers, and curious about the world, I find that really lovely. She is also considerate and kind.

The duke is the type that dominates. I find him quite a sadist. He is obsessive and just... Crazy. And hot and perfect type of man. Typical character in novels but I like how the author writes him. Not that usual yandere who spoils rotten only to someone they love and cold towards anyone else. I'm not sure what he feels toward Leyla is love or just obsession. Honestly, I kind of hate him but I love the story.

Ohh and my favorite character is Uncle Bill! He is such a tsunderee I love him.

4 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Jul 17, 2022
Status: c123
This is a great novel if you like a yandere ML. Please read the title and scram if you don't like it!

What I like about the novel is utterly miserable our MC is. I always love it when authors step on their MCs until they break. Layla is such a sweet cinnamon roll. Her despair is beautiful.

Our ML is the standard cold and heartless ML. Nothing revolutionary, but I don't want any in the first place. I love how cruel and dismissive our ML is to our MC, and how... more>> easy to spout abuse at him to support our MC. He just make you really eager to bring out the guillotine and kill of all the aristocrats you know?

Of course, these two are cliche characters but it's the way the writer and translator elaborate their inner world that make them so rich and memorable in our imagination. When they break the readers break with them.

I need to thank the translator again. The translation is very immersive. <<less
3 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Apr 30, 2022
Status: c107
This is the first time I'm writing a review in this site and for a story. Cry, Even Better If You Beg, gave me pause before I started reading it. The title is pretty telling but that’s how I choose what to read. I want all my emotions engaged and so into a story it would be very hard to get out of it. This story is not for everybody. The ML is truly despicable but how the author portrayed him given his circumstances is understandable although very unreliable if... more>> such a person can truly exist. He has everything presented to him in a platinum platter and he takes what he wants unmindful of feelings and consequences and in his status, these thoughts would not even enter his mind at all. The FL given her different set of circumstances tries her best to deal with adversaries that come her way, mostly due to the ML. I love these 2 flawed characters and the story telling style of the author. Even when I have such mixed emotions with these characters, there’s no question how quickly I became invested in their story. There’s anger, frustration, moments of sweetness along with feelings of high blood pressure rising - but despite all the roller coaster of emotions, I am rooting for the characters. I love all the supporting characters, the 2FL how she deals with the situation, all of it. I have been recommending this story to others but I understand that some will not be as invested as I am. I look forward to days when new chapters are updated. The translation team or person have done an exceptional job in doing so. I was very happy to read this story will soon have a visual representation... OMG.. that news just made my day. I am a speed reader so I try to wait until I get 6-7 new chapters before reading the updates. Now it’s saying it’s on break and will be back in 2 weeks, this will be the longest time I’ll have to wait. But since I like this story so much, 2 weeks is nothing compared to the joy and sorrow I experienced when reading new chapters updates. Thank you for the author, for writing such a unique love story, thank you for the translating team for doing an exceptionally great job and I can’t wait for more when new updates will be resumed again. <<less
3 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Mar 28, 2022
Status: c95
Since Matthias is an a**hole and the novel so far involves non-con (or perhaps dub-co if you're really, really lenient) I understand the low rating, but hear me out. If you can tolerate or enjoy twisted situations and a sadistic ML this one is SO worth it. Leyla sure is pitiful but she's also a strong FL and yes her circumstances suck but she's just trying her best. Every single important character is tridimensional and I simultaneously love and hate them, Leyla being the exception because 98% of the time... more>> I'm a stan.

AND OH MY GOD this is seriously so beautifully translated?? It's my favorite novel in that sense and it's also updated very frequently. Although I don't usually listen to it they include the audio novel* for every chapter which I think is cool.

*dunno if that's the right term <<less
3 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Feb 25, 2022
Status: --
I hate everyone except Leyla and Uncle Bill. I shed so much tear while binge reading this. I feel so bad for Leyla. My poor lovely girl. Matthias is a well-written bad character. He was unlike the other psycho male characters who had a traumatazing past that resulted to their evilness. Matthias is different. He didn't came from a toxic environment, nor he was mistreated, he wasn't traumatized by anything/anyone either. He isn't crazy, but his desire to possess Leyla turn him into one. I hate him. I really hate... more>> him. I also hate Claudine and her mother, Kyle's mother, Matthias' mother. I hate those who tormented Leyla for petty reasons. The girl is such an angel, so pure. She deserves nothing but the best. All I can do is to imagine that she didn't ended up with Matthias. I'll comfort myself by imagining that Leyla successfully escaped from his grasp, happily living with her dear Uncle Bill in another dimension. This is a great read. Thank you much, translators. ❤️ <<less
3 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Mar 23, 2021
Status: Completed
Everything is just so amazing! The metaphors are just brilliantly put. The uses of birds and flowers to describe Leila! I mean the way the author has written the book is just amazing!

Even though I don't like this character Matthias Von Herhardt at all but I can only grumble about it. I'm truly at awe at the author's writing rn. The epilogue + side stories are just beautiful. The author just blended the Male Lead so well that you can't really refute the pairing in the end, and it isn't... more>> even forced or just for the sake of male and female lead being together out of the blue. But I'll be honest, I don't like Matthias at all. I'll always choose Kyle over him. <<less
3 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Aug 06, 2022
Status: c130
Thank you translator for all your hard work and quality translation. Tldr review: quality read; truly well written. The characters will break your heart and every chapter is a cobblestone laid down enticing you down into their world/hell. I want to know if I can climb out if it with Layla.

Long tirade review: The description in this story paints a beautifully haunting picture of the self-indulgent two-faced nature of aristocracy. Expect to have your heart torn and trampled alongside the MC. If you start reading this while it is still... more>> updating, you will most likely be like me; caught up and refreshing the webpage every waking moment and reading a new chapter at 2am in the morning. Why!? Because this mental train wreck is both terrible and yet strangely tantalizing. Damn you, Matthias, your devil-like charm transcends the virtual pages. I keep hoping that maybe some innate goodness in you will manifest... but you make me wish I had an isekai truck to teleport you and all the aristocratic filth somewhere awful.

This shakes me back into reality where the world is not always fair. Yet hope, flickers...

Take my hand guys— we need to pull Layla out of there!!!! I will let Kyle hitch a ride too. <<less
2 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
Leave a Review (Guidelines)
You must be logged in to rate and post a review. Register an account to get started.