About how she died in previous life. The story is like this. MC loved the ML. she wanted a child. ML didn't want her to have child. the crown princess was jealous of MC. she sent a wine mixed with medicine that would cause MC became infertile for the rest of her life. The wine at first sent to ML to check. After the check was finished, the ML let the subordinates sent the wine to MC. But in the middle, the medicine was changed into deadly poison instead. Thus, the death of MC. The ML was in rage, he then killed everyone. The crown princess wrote a letter to tell him about how she ordered those momos to change the wine into poisonous wine. At the time the ML wanted to kill the crown princess with his sword, she already died by hanged herself... After that, if I am not wrong, the ML committed su*cide by stabbing his own heart with a dagger. He prayed if there is a next life, he wants to treat MC better. And thus the reborn...

At first I was frustrated that the MC was averse to furthering her education since it seems like a no-brainer. I've been brainwashed by the "education equals good future" series. The author managed to gradually change my thoughts on it through MCs insights. Basic reading and writing may help her but the task itself is another one of ML's selfish acts of trying to shape her to his preference. It also takes time away from practicing the skills she's good at and will need to earn a living once she runs away.

There's a scene where one of MLs friends tries to ridicule her for being uneducated and unrefined by blatantly questioning whether she can do things noble ladies are expected to like playing the guqin. MC unashamedly with a completely straight face answers no repeatedly. She doesn't care if they judge her for it. She sees no point in placing value on what other people want. The opinion that matters is her own.

MC was painfully poisoned to death with wine sent by ML in her first life.

It is revealed when ML regains his memories that he did not send her poisoned wine. MLs wife in the first life sent over drugged wine that would render MC infertile. His wife also fanned the flames of his anger by telling him that MC was meeting with other men. ML was irate and didn't want a child with an outside mistress regardless so when his servants caught the wine and brought it to his table, ML approved sending it over to MC. The drugged wine was switched out for poisoned wine and MC died.

This is where most similar plotlines of MC dying to MLs that have been awful the entire time justify the ML's actions. He was drugged, he was mentally ill, his family was being threatened, etc. ML had good intentions and always loved MC so it's all okay now!

Not.

MC has the best reaction I've seen. "Does it matter what was in that glass of wine? Not important. Zhao Shi's attitude towards her from the beginning to end was to treat her as a plaything, it never mattered whether it was death or injury. Unscrupulously violated her wishes and hurt her again and again."

The truth is irrelevant in the face of a lifetime of actions that proved he didn't value her. And the MC recognizes that while it is a "misunderstanding" in what was in the wine, the fact that he was going to unilaterally make choices about her body contrary to her wishes didn't change.

More on this. 2nd ML only wants to be with her. He is revealed to be equally ruthless and scheming as the ML. He stays in prison for an extended period of time to cancel an engagement to another lady forced on him by the ML. He mu*ders an official who saw MC while she was pretending to be dead so the official could not report it to the ML. The difference is that the 2nd ML uses his ability for the MCs freedom while the ML uses it to trap her. The line below is the MCs quote that pretty much sums it up.

"I don't know how many people he killed. I don't know if he is as scheming as you said. I only know that he has never hurt me or forced me to do things that I don't like"

It's important to bear in mind that the MCs experience as a reincarnator is continuous. Right after five years in her first life, she's immediately thrust into the same situation without a break. By the time she escapes for two years by faking her death, she's experienced six years in the abusive relationship.

It's hinted that MC is tired of men in general. When the MLs sister drags her to a brothel to play, the MC admits in her own thoughts that even without fear of the ML, she had no interest in the men and looked around because she appreciated the beauty of the women that worked there. Same reaction when other people point out good looking men. Not trying to imply she's into women, more to the point that she needs to focus on herself before considering a relationship.

2nd ML bumps into her while she's on the run and he takes care of her. MC warms up to 2nd ML during this time and begins to show affection right up until the ML discovers she's still alive two years later. MCs inner monologue reveals that she's uncertain about if her feelings towards 2nd ML are love since it's been six years in her mind since she's spent time with him. I'd argue that two years to start recovering from extended abuse and redevelop a relationship are on the short end.

After she is dragged back to the ML's side, she is shown through actions and inner dialogue to genuinely love the 2nd ML and that's precisely why she keeps her distance. 2nd ML has already been sent to the border once and thrown in jail twice, almost dying the second time, by the jealous ML. It's clear that showing her love for him is akin to threatening his life.

To the moment of MCs last meeting with 2nd ML, the story is crystal clear that the one she loves is him, the one he loves is her, and they both are aware she's not voluntarily with the ML. There's nothing to clarify because they both know the truth.

The escape plan itself was pretty good. She learned from her past failure by properly faking her death during a time everyone is occupied preparing for her sister and ML's wedding and not leaving a trail. Everything after that was pure idiocy that it's a miracle she made it two years...

MC doesn't even try to change her appearance. She wears a veil but takes it off in a banquet full of officials. People can also see her general features through the veil. I think she stops wearing the veil at some point as well. MC is informed that her photo is being circulated around the city and law enforcement yet does nothing to disguise. That's next level s*upidity.

She doesn't change her name either. I tried to justify this one. Maybe Ming Zhu is a common name like Anna Johnson or Jane Doe? MC teams up with a beggar her age and they register a household together so I figured it might have to do with the identity documents. But that makes no sense. How did they not catch her if she used her identity documents? If she didn't use her identity documents, how did she register? Why didn't she choose a different name? I had to give up trying to justify this one.

The place she heads to is her mother's hometown. It's the place she tried to escape to the first time. The ML knows she has an attachment to this place. It's the first place to logically search for her. Really?! Both the 2nd ML and ML head to the place she's hiding because they go to grieve her in the place they know she loves. The ML visits twice a year. Even the neighboring town would have significantly increased her chances of not getting caught.

the FL is just too soft, the first few chapters just made me wanted to stop reading as she just lets herself get bullied over and over again. like I understand that she can't do anything since she doesn't have any power but she at least could stand up for herself. the only thing that let me continue was that she really actually escapes and leave the ML as she said she would. I was glad she did since one, the ML keeps saying how he will 'spoil' her and give her want she wants, while denying that he has feelings for her. he also uses the excuse of her 'lowly' birth to not give her any title and also having a engagement with the s*upid fl's step sister. which made FL the target of criticisms and rumors of her using her appearance to seduce the ml. fast forward, she escapes and mets with the ex-fiance or second ML and says oh I don't really have any feelings as of now for him. this made me mad as she was literally giving the poor dude hope like if you knew you would have long cut the relationship. she later gives birth and almost died but didn't, it fast forward and the child is...i was surprised by how arrogant and spoiled the child was. like I understand spoiled since our FL tried her best to give the best for the child but I didn't expect her to become like a rich pamper lady and think everyone is below her and should give in to her. this is where the author just exemplifies the ml's genes. while during this entire ordeal, the ML was in misery and guilt (serves you right) and doesn't believe that the FL is dead, he also dreams about bits of the past. anyway, he finds her and uses the second ml's life to force her to go back to the capital with him (which makes me hella mad like the second ML doesn't deserve any of this well he did kill a bit of corrupted people but like compare to the ml? all he wanted was to love the FL while the FL takes advantage without knowing of his love.) the end? bruh, so effing s*upid she doesn't like him but still have this lingering feeling and doesn't want him dead while he uses his own body and health to force her to care about him and saying it doesn't matter if she doesn't like him, he could slowly make her like him.......

She spends the entire novel hating the ML for sending her poisoned wine which she could have easily figured out he didn’t based on the years of visions she had of him grieving her. At first she doesn’t still have feelings for her ex-fiancé but later develops them again and even wants to marry him. At the end of the novel she still meets up with him not-so-secretly. The extent of the love she has for the ML at the end is “I don’t want him to die.”

Honestly, he’s like a lite version of the ML of WCE. He basically gets progressively less yandere and by the end of the novel lets her leave the palace whenever she wants. He doesn’t even care that she meets up with her ex-fiancé because he’s just happy she doesn’t want him to die.

Tbh, it’s not that I like him or anything but he puts up with more than any crown prince ever actually would. Like FL’s friend broke into the palace to poison him and he doesn’t care at all. His ex-fiancée tried to harm FL multiple times and he basically only says if she tries one more time he’ll kill her.

Seems to genuinely love FL and will do anything for her, but it doesn’t really make sense that he’s okay at the end of the novel given all the times he’s arrested for shit. Story ends with him basically telling her all she has to do is call and he’ll come running

Carbon copy of ML. Total brat and future psychopath. FL doesn’t see it because she’s a clingy angel around mommy

I hate it bc It's true ML was the one who (inderectly) killed her.

It's sheng ling, under disguise want to send her some medicine that prevent her from having a child in this lifetime. ML approve the idea, and send it to her without knowing the medicine was switched. And yea FL died. Filled with rage ML killed everyone but let sheng ling go (for a few years according to MTL) when he wanted to end her life, sheng ling comit su*cide.

For a moment I forgot this author really loves creating plot where the victim end up with her killer.

there's even a sceme where he admit he's the one who inderectly killed her, and somehow saying "zhu zhu cant you forget what happend in the past"

THIS MAD HAD AUDACITY OMFG ?