A self insert gary stu fanfic fixfic of harry potter. Only its from china, so there are weird names and goblins have eyes that "shine with cunning" and MC is "horrified all his secrets are seen through" by ollivander.
MC was a (chinese) huge fan of Harry Potter and read the books multiple times. He then died and reincarnated as a newborn baby in Harry Potter world, he thought it was a normal earth until he got his hogwarts letter at age 11. Seconds after getting the letter he went with his parents to a business meal...
Remember the business meal during which dobby dropped a cake on the wife of the visitor to get harry in trouble? well, turns out MC was inserted as their kid. Only this time because of MC meddling dobby gave dudley a pig tail instead (since when is he attacking humans?). And in few whispers that happened offscreen MC convinced his parents that magic is real, that harry is abused, and that they should bribe vernon with a good business deal to convince him to let them take harry of his hands, so he is now the MC's adopted brother!
MC seems to switch between knowing stuff, such as knowing about harry and dudley and lockhart. To not knowing stuff, such as harry informing him about snape and MC then "realizing snape is an asshole" based on harry's description. How did he not know anything about snape if he is such a huge fan that memorized the books?
After 6 chapters nothing really happened, MC faffed about a bit, MC is as studious and smart as hermione with whom he engages in technobabble, giving harry a headache. MC convinces mrs weasley to let him buy a nice robes for ginny. And for some damn reason MC has a thestral core wand from ollivander. At least it isn't elderwood too, since if it was it would literally be the elder wand.
Also for some reason MC is horrified by having a thestral core wand and wants to throw it away instead of elated at having innate powers over death and being an OP mary sue.
MC has magic healing sperm, a woman who is madly in love with him and clearly reciprocating is crippled and dying and he can heal her. Despite actually wanting to (both because she is in love with him and because she doesn't want to die), she declares that she needs to die because her sect law bans relations with a man and as much as she loves him, she would rather die than disobey her sect.
At which point he "rapes" her, she makes a full recovery, and we discover the reason the sect has that law is that their cultivation technique is copied to anyone they have s*x with and they rightly know other sects will be lining up to gangrape them if they knew.
This is extremely contrived and unrealistic scenario the author has set up, and it is technically rape because she said no, but it's not really fair to brand the MC as a rapist over it due to the actual implied scenario of the word
So far this is great. MC reincarnated (for once not transmigrated, but actually reborn into an infant!) from earth... into a crappy village in the middle of nowhere. Reincarnators who retain their memories are not unheard of and are normally recruited into xianxia sects to learn cultivation (as it is considered a form of mental talent). But he instead got exorcised by the evil village witch, and having watched her kill off another family for "bad omens" shut his mouth and worked hard at the farm.
At age 15 MC runs away from his abusive family and lucks out into finding a master... who teaches him "demon" (as in, animals who cultivate, not devilish dao) cultivation techniques instead of human cultivation techniques. Practicing demonic cultivation actually causes him to transform from being a human into becoming a minotaur like creature.
MC personality is actually decent. He is neither a psychotic killer, nor is extreme bleeding heart pacifist / wussy japanese reincarnator.
Moreover, the world is pretty decent as well. Author even takes the occasional amusing jab at your typical xianxia insanity. With the MC expecting to be forced to kill the young master, then his dad, then his dad, then his dad, then their whole clan... only to be shocked by the reality of it not coming to pass as people are actually able to show a shred of reason.
While exceptions exist, most people can be sensible. While greedy people are many, not everyone would rob for money. MC sometimes trusts people, and amazingly not everyone of them is greedy to the bone. Some are, some aren't.
MC amusingly practices some "evil" arts, but only against unambiguously acceptable targets (eg, mass murdering bandits).
Likewise, MC avoids the insanity of the "low profile to a fault" so commonly practiced in xianxia.
This couldn't get more cliche. Also about half of every chapter is repetition (on average, some are even more, some are less).
MC is trash that can't cultivate, everyone hates him for no reason, transmigrate, cheats (followed him in reincarnation and only started working now. The cheat is a common looking energy gem that is actually a pocket dimension that can store stuff, has time dilation that increases with his cultivation, and contains an inheritance), cultivate at an utterly ridiculous speed (ridiculous even for one of those cliche stories).
What really gets me is how stupid MC is. He sees his body's mother (which he cares about for some reason) going around suffering to try to finance his cultivation. Pawning her jewelry, begging, etc. He decides to keep his wealth and abilities a secret from her "so it will be a surprise".
At the same time he explicitly confides almost all his secrets with the maid (it literally explicitly states he told her all his secrets except his reincarnation and the time-space spindle). This is after he was killed via a betrayal of a woman he loved in the past life. Moreover, the new body he snatched on reincarnation was also betrayed by the woman it loved (before being taken over by the MC who doesn't care about her anymore). So having known repeated betrayel from waifus, he continues to tell them all his secrets. At least tell the mother instead of telling the waifu.
Earth is a trash tier realm, some very high level higher realm cultivator noted their exceptional cunning and drive (earth had cultivators, but those historical figures were not cultivators), placed a seal on their souls after their death, and arranged for them to reincarnate an isolated top tier cultivation planet after giving them each an inheritance suited to them. He has plans for them. He is also been gone for a very long time and had nothing to do with the MC travelling over