I understand that the FL had ilness, that's why she wanted to do everything in her last time. But her way to achieve everything is really wrong. It was naive and selfish at the same time. She fell in love with ML, then she forced him into marriage by kidnapping his parents. That's a big red flag you know? And she expected him to love her willingly, or accept her love confession? Hell, nah. You're dreaming too far💀.

The reason why readers pity her is because the story was build from her point of view. She also had illness and limited time. If she weren't ill, I'm sure this story would become a full naration of her obsession (well, it already is). I've read some chapters and I still can't understand or even feel sad. It seems like those pity narations were made to justify her bad and selfish behavior. She was the one who brought misery in her own life. Yes, it's a tragic ending. But somehow I feel that she deserves it. And for the ML, I won't say too much. Normal people will hate someone who kidnapped their parents and forced them into marriage, but I guess there's something wrong with ML as well. Whether those regrets happened because she died or because he developed a kind of stockholm syndrome😐.

just like what gao fei said. This is a story about he yujin and him. Just a story about them.

For starters, the MC is an inherently kind but also extremely naive girl who has the misfortune of coming from a rich family. And yes, you read that right, misfortune. Because she has lived such a pampered life, the MC has a somewhat detestable character trait of being relentless in getting what she wants. When she first meets the ML and falls in love with him, she does everything in her power to get him -- to the point where her father even kidnaps the ML's parents to get him to marry her. This, to put it lightly, is pretty despicable and is blackmail at best. In any other story, I would have hated her.

But the MC is also aware of her despicable actions. She is so understanding that what she has done is unforgivable, to the point where she is able to tolerate (even welcome, in some cases) the ML's neglect and loathing because she thinks she deserves it. Is the MC right? Part of me wants to say yes -- because of her interference, the ML's parents had to suffer through that ordeal, she caused him to break up with his girlfriend, and she was essentially forcing someone who doesn't love her to marry her. She needs some kind of punishment for that, doesn't she?

Only, it's not that simple. If someone steals a dollar from you, then to balance out the injustice they can just give a dollar back. You can't measure retribution for emotional trauma or for wrecking someone's life. Because MC does, in fact, suffer tremendously in her marriage with the ML. She leaves the luxuries of her old life and waits on the ML night and day. When he is cruel to her, and my lord does he say some of the cruelest things, she accepts them with apologies and "I love you"s to spare. She endures his implied unfaithfulness, the rejection of anything related to her, his disgust at her very existence. We also later figure out that the MC has a terminal illness that will take her life and causes her much pain. Her father, her last family member in the world, dies as well.

Isn't this enough karma for what she has done to him? I most certainly think so.

Another reason why I don't hate her (even though I feel like I should) is that she just loved the ML so much. The scene where she starts to prepare his birthday dinner early in the day only to become paralyzed because of her illness was my first indication that she was just a hopeless, miserable fool in love. She had the chance to stop the pain. Her phone was right there -- she could have called him and asked the ML to deliver the medicine to suppress her illness. Only, she didn't. Why? Because she didn't want to ruin the birthday surprise, and probably in part because she didn't want to inconvenience him/ruin his mood with her presence.

She said, when the sun rose, not to look at her; when the moon rose, not to look at her.

So, I did as she wished.

When the sun rose, I did not look at her.

When the moon rose, still, I did not look at her.

Chapter 10

And yet, Gao Fei thinks about her all the time..., especially when he was with his second wife (Jiajing)

In this world, she (JJ) was the only person who called me Fei. This seemed like an extremely intimate way to address me.

Ah Yu would only call me Gao Fei, calling me by the entirety of my surname and given name. Even when we made love, she would still call me in this manner, as though she could not help the careful way with which she spoke to me.

From addressing her as Miss He (the whole duration of their marriage) to Ah Yu

And even, when he was having s*x with his 2nd wife (JJ)

But I did not expect that each time as I closed my eyes, my hands, wandering across the body of my wife, would transform into Ah Yu's slender fingers as they traced my body. Within the darkness of the night, under the warmth of the blankets, Ah Yu often clung onto me unabashedly as she chattered on and on, just like a small firefly whose light could never be extinguished. Even if I ignored her advances, she did not grow bashful, and made straight for the main topic.

After the death of Yujin, he wanted to grant her, her final wish - a lifetime of happiness and peace

And he tried - very, very hard.

He moved out from their home, married his first love (Jiajing), moved into a new home, was looking forward to fatherhood, and had a thriving career.

He was a loving husband, attentive and warm (basically, everything that he was NOT with Yujin) and yet...

And ten months after we wed, I began to have an illusion, an uneasy feeling.

I did not know if it were a mere hallucination on my part, but it did happen.

Each time I was around Jiajing, I began to feel a sense of dissociation, as though I did not truly exist in this world.

I thought that I should have already forgotten Ah Yu. Even if there was truly something between us, I should have already forgotten them.

Of all the characters in this story, I relate most with Jiajing

5 years after they broke up, they reconnected again, she was still in love with Gao Fei (GF) and married him. JJ tot that GF's first marriage was just a detour and they were back where they belong.

It was extremely painful for her to realize that GF was a haunted and broken man - his hallucination, his unbearable longing and mechanical ways of living. She really tried to help him - by talking to him, setting up the docs appointment, bringing in their parents to confront him, by giving him space and understanding (each time, he had to go to the villa), but ultimately, she broke. It is very hard to save someone, when that person doesn't think there was anything wrong.