Cry, Even Better if you Beg

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The Herhardt household’s masterpiece.

The young owner of a heaven-like place called Arvis.

The beautiful bird slaughterer.

Matthias von Herhardt.

His perfect life- completely swallowed, crushed, and shaken-

by his lovely bird.

Leyla Lewellin.

Cut, locked, and tamed her wings.

In order to keep Leyla Lewellin in custody, Matthias did not hesitate in his actions.

Because he did not hesitate, he did not regret.

Because he did not regret, he did not reflect.

Because he did not reflect, he did not apologize.

When his beautiful bird, Leyla Lewellin, opened her cage and flew away, Matthias decided.

“If I am to lose her forever and can’t get her back, I’d rather kill her.”

Associated Names
One entry per line
Cry, or Better Yet, Beg
울어봐, 빌어도 좋고
Related Series
Bastian (Shared Universe)
Recommendations
Come and Cry at My Funeral (3)
His Canary (2)
Even If It’s Not Love (2)
Flowers Are Bait (2)
Sweet Villain (2)
Doberman (2)
Recommendation Lists
  1. Alexa, play Criminal by Britney Spears
  2. fav straight yandere
  3. I wish to forget what I just read
  4. (^ v ^) : to read [complete] .6
  5. Grovel and Happy Ending (If not, at least has a sa...

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59 Reviews sorted by


TheSandGirl
New TheSandGirl rated it
March 4, 2024
Status: Completed
Loved it.

It reminded me to a certain extent of the love story between Takumi and Nana (Hachiko) from the manga NANA, my favourite manga story.

Neither Layla nor Matthias knew how to love or be loved, but they chased or ran away from it with their whole being. I ended up cheering for him way more than for her. He was a very interesting character and his character growth was awesome to follow.

This book is not for a snowflake auditory, it's not fluffy, at least for a good chunk of it.... more>> There were times when I was frustrated with the FL and ML, but I was rooting for them wholeheartedly.

I quite liked Riette, the duchess dowager, and Elysee by the end of the novel. <<less
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IsabelleSebastian
IsabelleSebastian rated it
August 20, 2022
Status: c57
SPOILER ALERT

My rating has nothing to do with the author or translators. I in all honesty respect and value their efforts. My rating is purely based on what I felt while reading and I haven't even completed the story, though I read the last chapter (ch 130 so far) as I could not take it anymore.

I was looking for a story similar to Lemonade by Nina Pennacchi and someone recommended this one. I DNFed after reading 56 chapters and few random chapters and last chapter (ch 130 so far). I... more>> felt depressed and melancholic but not in a good emotional detox-will see silver lining shortly kind of way, but in a way where I felt claustrophobic and oxygen-deprived with darkness all around me and no hope to escape. I do indulge in these emotions from time to time by reading about such characters but I also look forward to their transition towards healing and ultimately happiness. But the MCs of this book cannot gloss over the events that happened between them and make me believe in their "HEA".

This story spans out roughly over a period of 10 years. It starts when FL is 12 and ML is 18. Actual interactions between them take place when FL has turned 18. ML is characterized as an extreme Yandere (psychotic obsessive kinds). To me it felt like he was jaded and bored with his life. He was born into wealth and never had to desire for anything. He just goes about performing his duties and reacting to people and situations like he's expected to do. He does not have a tragic backstory except that he loses his father at a young age of 12. He has a loving family and has his life perfectly cut out for him. On the other hand FL has a tragic childhood. She becomes an orphan at a young age and gets subjected to neglect, mental and physical abuse, poverty, hunger, abandonment etc. She ends up at her uncle's place at the age of 12. Uncle happens to be a gardener working at ML's estate.

ML finds FL's social and financial status a thing to be mocked at and gets a kick out of bullying her. His bullying is so intense sometimes that I feared for her safety and life. Mind you we haven't even reached 30% of the book and more bullying is yet to come. Now ML desires FL and makes her his mistress through blackmail. She hates herself for becoming one but also suffers body-betraying syndrome from time to time. ML know how much that hurts her but because of his social standing cannot think of marrying her. Him dishonoring his "love interest" like that for the sake of some title and wealth felt cowardly and distasteful. Also there's war setting at around 75% of the book.

Finally after getting a fair idea of how events turned out I jumped to the last chapter. In the last chapter I got to know that FL is pregnant with ML's child. FL tells ML with all seriousness how much she hates and detests him and does not want to be with him. ML as usual blackmails her by threatening to take away their unborn child to make her stay with him. FL is so exhausted at this point from her pregnancy, war around, losing her uncle to war, almost scared of losing her only friend that she falls into a restless sleep with tears pouring out. ML licks her tears and revels in her despair and thinks to himself "Her tears still tasted like heaven." And that my friends is the last line of the book. I mean I could never in a million years root for such toxicity. I felt so sad for the FL. This story reminded me of how unfair and unjust life is to some people. It breaks my heart to think about girls and women who go through such ordeals in real life.

This book totally lives up to its title. I will only recommend this book to those readers who are okay without an actual HEA because there is none. If you are looking for a trope where you want to warm up to the ML eventually, this story is not for you. I found Matthias unlikeable, insecure and evil even until the end of the story. He is not well-adjusted and seriously needs a therapist to help him figure out how to deal with his feelings and emotions maturely. These qualities are not attractive to me in a ML. I need to either have a crush on my MLs or at least feel some kind of buddy-ship with them to root for them. Second ML is the one with actual likeable qualities.

In my imagination FL either kills herself or ML under extreme duress. What I actually like to imagine is that FL kills ML and starts a decent life with second ML.

I read few books where ML commits super horrible things but turns a new leaf for FL and FL is actually happy by the end of the story.

1. Virtue and Vanity by Astrid Jane Ray (ML r**** FL on wedding night and grovels like no other ML out there. This book is in FL's POV. Do check out author's Wattpad for ML's POV called Strings Attached after you have read the book)

2. Monster by Franchetta Phal

3. Resurrect by Astrid Jane Ray

4. The Flesh and the Devil by Teresa Denys

5. Of course I will include Lemonade by Nina Pennacchi

6. His Little Bird series by TheWanderer'sWanderingDaughter - It's a four-part Dramione fanfic with loads of non-con and other forms of torture. Fourth part is still ongoing. I read it on archiveofourown or a03 site.

Thanks for reading!!! <<less
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aika1801
aika1801 rated it
January 13, 2021
Status: c21
dropped it at chapter 21. props to the translator for translating it very well! I really, really, reaaaaaaaaally tried hard to get into it, but I just couldn't bring myself to condone any of the bullying the poor MC has to submit herself to - even if it's for plot purposes urgh... also can't bring myself to feel any sympathies for the ML, he speaks like an a**hole, behaves like an a**hole, is an a**hole. I don't think I can hold on for so long to see him unravel for... more>> the MC either, so... yep dropped it. that's just my two cents though, so everyone else reading it, have fun! <<less
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Kieukieu
Kieukieu rated it
August 5, 2020
Status: c3
Literally know this is going to be an absolute favorite of mine after only 3 chapters, yup it's that great of a setup, translation and potential. Much Thanks to the translator for her hard work!
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bluce_cluce
bluce_cluce rated it
August 15, 2020
Status: c15
Same as akane09! The translation is really good!!

Spoiler

plot wise so far I can’t accept it if Matthias is ML. He’s rude and he totally doesn’t respect Leyla. The only redeeming fact about him is the fact that he’s p good looking but his personality is total shit. There’s a way to flirtatiously tease someone without making the person feel like total tr*sh but he doesn’t know how to do that.

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akane09
akane09 rated it
August 11, 2020
Status: c20
Wow! This review is primarily for the translator. The story is easy to follow and the translations are regularly updated. I feel spoiled. Thank you for your wonderful work. It's appreciated and enjoyed!

As for the story, I'm not too far into it but I'm already hooked. I'm a sucker for the yandere ML stories and this one doesn't look like it's going to disappoint.
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Smaforte12
Smaforte12 rated it
November 25, 2021
Status: c1 part1
Ooooooh shit!!! It's been a while since I've felt such thrill!!! Such a need to keep up with a novel!!! The psycho ML, the poor FL! I love it!!! I feel like he's going to kill our poor "soon-to-be-doc"... Who knows! He's a psycho after all, so who knows what the author will say he'll do.

I had to come back to update my previous post... it's with a heavy heart that... ... more>>
Spoiler

I couldn't finish this story. Gave up after the FL indecisive behavior. It's ridiculous how dumb she is. I drew out my own conclusion of what the next chapters would possibly be about, moved this novel to my unwanted section, and moved on with my life. Like sealing off a bad memory after waking up from a drunken stupor... you just don't want to recall it.

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Spoiler

clearly the FL is a peanut brain, because I cannot fantom the thought of someone going through so much shit! Yet, being so s*upid. I mean, she needs to suffer more! I feel no compassion for her after a few chapters in. As humans, what sets us apart from animals; among many other factors, is the ability to reason... and THAT ability, seems to be something the FL never acquired.

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<<less
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ArtKnight_99
ArtKnight_99 rated it
March 29, 2022
Status: --
Brilliantly translated but terribly written. I am a total simp for a psycho/over the top handers ML, BUT THIS GUY IS A JERK. I was really disturbed by his callous treatment of the FL, it felt like he didn't really like her at all. While the FL wasn't the sharpest tool in the she's, she was a sweet girl who I actually found myself liking a lot, which made the whole story.... just bad. It bothered me. He felt so petty, and there wasn't anything about him that was actually... more>> cool or worth smiling for. AND I LIKE YANDERE/PSYCHO TYPE MLS. If youre gonna be a bad guy at least be a big villain or have a personality. Like... his main character trait was honest to god f*ckery and jerkiness. Not cool. Personally, I would recommend a different psycho ML story, like maybe "I Lost the Leash of the Yandere ML" or "I Became The Villain's Pendant". At least the Male Lead doesn't feel like a privileged a**hole using his position to f*ck with a naive child. <<less
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Kokolei
Kokolei rated it
September 27, 2021
Status: Completed
I just finished reading this novel and all I have to say is...I am so unsatisfied. The depth of sorrow and desperation to escape that the MC has is so high that for a moment..I thought I was actually feeling these emotions. At one point I didn't think it was possible for MC to have a happy ending as she kept facing impossible situations. The novel does end with a happy ending but to me it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.

Why is it that every Korean novel I... more>> read, the ML is so awful... it's to the point of insanity.

If you decide to read this, make sure you get your tissues ready once you hit the halfway point of this novel. I should have read the tags carefully because now I'm gonna need to detox heavily after finishing this. <<less
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Aria064
Aria064 rated it
February 5, 2023
Status: --
A classic example of wasted potential due to writer's obsession of wanting to make a fairytale ending for ML and FL when they are the abuser and victim respectively.

Spoiler alert:-

The novel starts same as your average "Anne of Green Gables" with FL being an orphan, rejected by several of her distant relatives and was abused in the process, comes to a beautiful village called Arvis by train. Then she was adopted by her kindhearted uncle Bill, who is working as a gardener in ML's residence. She grows up happily among... more>> the gorgeous sceneries of beautiful Arvis receiving love from her dear uncle and being accompanied by 2nd ML who is the same age as her. She leads a quite fulfilling life till she is 18 years old until her nightmare, the ML comes home.

From here onwards the author lays up the groundwork to the plot alas making FL suffer under the hands of ML. There is no any reason for his bullying of ML, the simple reason given is that he is a jerk. The ML is an aristocratic sh*t who hides his true self under the fake gentlemanly pristine image and tortures FL for his sick pleasure because she is an interesting creature that is easy to bully. He indirectly destroys FL's engagement with 2nd ML, blackmails FL to be his mistress and r*pes her daily, while humiliating her in the process. This is not love and he simply treats FL as his toy because he can afford doing it.

With the continued shame, abuse, r*pe and guilt of being the mistress of an already engaged man, FL decides to flee with her uncle to another country and from this point onwards ML's "interest" turns into "obsession", then into "madness". He literally sets out find FL just to kill her just because she fled from her abuser. He enlists as a commander, sets out to find FL with war troupes and finally finds FL. He confines FL who is heavily pregnant with his child, uses his own child to blackmail FL again and make FL's life a living hell. (He didn't kill FL only because she is pregnant with his child so he can use another reason to bind her to him.) FL's health gradually deteriorate due to constant fear and loss of freedom and she nearly losses her life. ML finally wakes up and makes the decision to leave FL for her own good.

Now, if this story ended at this narrative, it would have been another great novel. Although the two had went their separate ways at least ML has made a great progression in character growth and FL had achieved her wish of gaining freedom from ML (FL is always compared to a bird in the novel). But, the author had to go the typical route of "FL suddenly realizing what she felt for ML was not fear nor hate, but it is loooove!", therefore effectively making FL another s*upid, love-crazed two dimensional damsel in distress and ruining the essence of the novel while literally only 10 or so chapters remaining from the main story. In chapter 138, author invalidates FL's sufferings and grievences with a simple paragraph of "She had mistaken it, so wrongly to be terror or great anxiety around him. And maybe there were times it was that, but that wasn't entirely true."

At the final few chapters, the author haphazardly ties all the loose ends of novel using "war" as an excuse. ML's mother/grandmother's obvious dislike for FL's humble origins tone down due to war, ML's engagement with 2nd FL breaks off due to war, FL's love and longing for ML deepens and she forgives all his misgivings due to war, and ultimately they move from their home town and start a new beginning in an environment with people who are unaware of their dirty past because of war!!, how convenient (rolls eyes). <<less
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minibeth
minibeth rated it
March 18, 2021
Status: --
I'm reading the MTL version of this novel so I was having a lack of comprehension for this one. But I will be honest with my review.

The title itself is a proof that this is a drama. But when you read it the phase is just hmmm... Just average feel. It's like when you read your typical historical english romance novel. That's where am I getting on this one.

The story started when the FL Leila/Leyla been adopted by his far relative uncle Bill. And how she wants to be a... more>> good daughter figure to his uncle. But due to some coincidence he always get entangled with the ML Matthias or Matthius in the MTL version.

I will warn you on this one because the ML has a case of bullying the FL so much. As the title itself. He always did something bad to the FL because he wants to see a reaction from her. And that is to make her cry resulted to bullying and also s*xual assault.

Spoiler

He felt an attraction to the FL. s*xual attraction that he wants to claim her so badly.

[collapse]

The female lead wants to avoid the ML so much but the ML itself don't want to stop and his making a round on the FL.

Actually the FL is mature and a fighter even at a young age. And she is also a lovable and adorable character. Maybe the reason I'm still reading it until now.

ML have a crappy personality. He is not just a perfectionist but also has a case of obsession towards our FL. This results to our FL being suffocated already. The ML is also hot headed and he is the type that 'whatever it is, I get it' guy. The most despicable type of personality. Like I'm already turn off so badly.

I agree with other who review this. I want the ML to crumble and beg our FL.

Spoiler below read at your own risk.

Spoiler

I read some few chapters accidentally and it has mature content. And FL being pregnant and running away.

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All and all I give this 3 stars. I'm still not finish I'm still on chapter 60 or 64. Not so sure lol. But this rating will be enough because I'm still not finish.

If you want a roller coaster ride of feels. This story will be good for you. Like you will be totally gets frustrated so badly and pity the FL lots of times. Why ML do this and that. Why! Wanna kill that jerk already lol.

P.S I really recommend this if you read the story whole I guess. Because if you read it and look forward for every update the feels of the story will be gone. So full story reading is better on my opinion. <<less
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SimpingNaruse
SimpingNaruse rated it
October 28, 2021
Status: c55
I absolutely love this novel. And I love all three main characters but.. Obviously I love Matthias the most. He is kinda crazy but he is just so interesting. I can think about the reasons behind his actions all day long.

And the translation is SO good! The best that I have read so far. The plot is so well written and emotions well described. This is definitely my most favourite novel of recent times.

Please suggest similar novels if there's any :))
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mari_btch
mari_btch rated it
October 15, 2021
Status: c1 part1
This novel is absolutely one of my favourite korean novel like woooowww. The plot is well written and the emotions are overflowing. A lot of readers seems to hate the ml, and sure because of that they end up giving this masterpiece a low rating that's why I decided to make an account and give this a 5 star rating. It's a good read, definitely recommend this.
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sally solie
sally solie rated it
December 15, 2023
Status: --
One of the worst novels I read, yes it maybe written in poetical way which is rare for a webnovel but it would be a below average written book compared to real ones. This book had internalised mysiogny, lookism and treated women awfully. It could have had potential if the author didn't follow the same childish story of all women are evil and are irredeemable. It had the childish of plot of how the ML liked the FL like everytime they meet she falls infront of him. And yes I... more>> read dark romance and sometimes like them in this one I couldn't feel the romance between the leads more like the FL is forced to love him by the end there was no chemistry whatsoever and their relationship wasn't well developed. Now when it comes to the side characters, oh the author loves to torture them, like torturing claudine by making her lover riette die instead of mathias, now this would have been a good romantic relationship but the author just liked to follow the same path of giving awful ending to the villainess even though the real villain is the ml. Its mysoginistic to write redeemable men but not redeemable women. If the author was less expected and killed the ML or at the very least let the villainess have a happy ending it would be a better story.

Now when it comes to the personality of the FL I found it quite flat, like all her personality was being there, and yes she isn't strong and the author didn't do a good job to show how her personality is sunshine and all that stuff the author keeps telling us throughout the story like how there is no one like the FL and how she is perfect and all but didn't manage to write her personality even well, like all the FL did as being there.

Now lets come to the plot all the plot revoloves about is how every woman hates the female lead which is lazy writing to me.

Now lets come to the part where I really hated the age story the FL and ML first meeting was when she is a lietral child and the fact that the FL age was less than 21 while the ML is 24 I mean I don't mind an age gap, but at thevery least make her older than 21. I know the author tried to make it less creepy by saying the ML didn't think anything of her in the side chapters, but in every solche novel the leads fall in love at first sight which is so creepy in this story the FL is a literal child.

Overall this novel is your average dark romance except the author didn't write it will be dark or taboo romance which is worse, the author tried putting many elments together like the antihero ML and the war and the villainess and the orphan plot and servant and the duke story, but it was all excuted poorly, anyone who likes this please try reading more, yes the story is tr*shy but it is the bad tr*shy type and there are other tr*shy novels with less internalized mysiogny and internalized racism.

Also beauty is subjective and the claudine was prettier than the FL and she riette would have looked so good together, also kyle is kind of pushy and I didn't like him I mean all his personality was loving the fl

Also the story isn't even that well written and there are better written stories <<less
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Cuebee5566
Cuebee5566 rated it
September 27, 2023
Status: ---
First thing I want to say about this series is that; this story is not for everyone. If you are expecting realistic characters (especially FL) - with a properly executed story, then this is not for you. If you are looking for a possessive, obsessive yet entertaining story then this one is not for you. Honestly speaking, the story felt like it was only made to make the FL suffer until she accepts the ML.

But still, I must say that the author writes so beautifully. She writes so beautifully and... more>> that's how I was able to read this far. I usually drop most webnovels after a few chapters but this one made me read until I had enough.

So I can tell that the problem wasn't on how the writer wrote but on the story that they wrote.

This will contain spoilers.

ML and FL were attracted to each other from the start but neither of them knew. At first, ML is only teasing the FL because he wants her attention and reaction. But FL hates it, it makes her feel little, although ML couldn't understand why.

The second time they met, FL was already a grown-up. And ML knew right away, that he desired her. He wanted her. And so, he will do everything to have her.

Spoiler

ML assaulted FL many times (before the actual r*ped happened) which traumatized the FL. It made her feel dirty and shameful. So, she wanted to get away from ML.

And then the incident happened. Her beloved Uncle Bill was imprisoned due to his negligence. When ML found out about it, he knew right away that FL wouldn't have any other choice but to seek him for help. So, he started planning right away. He offered FL a deal - to sleep with him in eexchange of her uncle's freedom. FL didn't want to. She declined and tried to find other ways to help her uncle, but in the end, she was left with no other choice but to accept ML's offer.

FL thought it would only be one time. So she slept with him. She felt so bad. She felt so guilty. She was ashamed and disgusted. She was traumatized and started to get depressed. But ML made it so that her uncle would feel indebted to him thus making him and FL stay. Now, the FL has no other choice but to become his mistress.
He r*ped her continuously.

FL was slowly losing herself. She was getting depressed. Every time she feels happy, ML will show up and ruin it by forcing himself on her.
FL was full of hatred towards ML and all she wanted was to be able to escape.

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Now, this is where the story gets ugly.

Spoiler

When FL, finally gets to escape with her uncle. A war broke out. So it gave ML a chance to attack the place she was staying at and look for her. Her uncle died in that war. And it was really disappointing because it felt like the only reason he had to die was for ML to have FL all for himself (and for additional drama) or the author doesn't know how they will make the ML take the FL again if her uncle is still alive. So it felt like a lazy writing to me.

Anyway, ML found the FL and she was pregnant. Once again, FL begged, cried, and fought back. But ML didn't care. He used her friend (2nd ML) to threaten her
He also used their child to threaten FL.

For ML, their child was nothing but a pest whom he would have to share FL with. So for him, the child's only purpose was to make FL stay with him. He doesn't care whether that child dies.

Now, FL wanted to get away from ML. Sometimes she gets a glimpsed of hope that ML will change because of their child but ML showed her that he doesn't care about the child. And if that child became a reason for FL's death, he would kill it right away. So FL wanted to escape.

FL was so stressed she became sick and almost died. The doctors couldn't treat her because it might kill the baby inside her but ML doesn't care. So FL got treatment. And, that made ML changed his mind. FINALLY, he is willing to ser her free. But when ML finally decided to set her free. The enemies started bombing their place. FL was alone and was screaming for help but no one was around. And that's when she remembered ML and thought he would come and save her since he will never leave her alone. And like a hero, ML showed up.

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And this is the most ridiculous part of this story and the part that made me drop the series.
Spoiler

FL who was happy that she could finally escape from ML just a few minutes ago - felt so happy to see ML during the bombing, not because he would save her but because she was overflowing with love. She felt so giddy over him, she showered him with love confessions - much to ML's surprise (and mine as well)

I find it ridiculous because FL didn't even take hours to have a change of heart and mind, it was only a few minutes.

And she started confessing she loved him all this time and that the only reason why she couldn't accept him was because of her guilt (since he was engaged with someone else). And that's the part that disappoints me. The romanticization of what ML did - without a proper execution. Everything was just brushed off with FL's confession. In other series with the same theme as this series, it usually takes days, weeks, months, or even years before FL SLOWLY FORGIVES AND HEAL and accepts ML. There was an entire process and explanation for how it happened, not like this where FL just completely changed from being tired of ML to being giddy in a matter of few minutes, and now everything is forgiven, everything is okay.

But no, FL still needs to suffer and ML needs to shine. So the author had to make Claudine into a Villainess - after all, ML needs a villain to show his ever-lasting love for FL.

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I hate the fact that they made another woman into a villain just to make the ML shine. ML who did worst was forgiven abd given a chance. But I like the fact that the author didn't whitewash ML and used Trauma to justify his actions. ML was evil, selfish, and unhinged. He knew what he did but didn't regret it. Everyone told him what he did was wrong but he doesn't care since those actions made him have the FL. And he doesn't really care.

He doesn't even understand why FL hates him or why she runaway. And even thought, FL was so ungrateful for what she did to him, think how could she not be happy despite the "kindness" he showed her? ML was a full narcissist. And the author didn't sugar-coat him. He didn't change until the end, he just learned how to control it.

And this is where an open ending would of make more sense instead of giving that "and they live happily ever after" kind of ending that the author gave us.

ML felt jealous of his children and didn't love them as much.

But the author wanted us to believe it will be a happy ever after for the kids as well. Really? After their father called them a pest for having to share FL with them?

I have read lots of manga with the same theme as this but I love those because it wasn't romanticized. The story stayed dark and thrilling until the end.

So that's the most disappointing thing about this series, the romanticization, the gaslighting of the story.
ML who ruined FL's life got a happy ending (so he was right not to regret what he did because as he said, it made FL be with him) BUT those who deserves a happy ending didn't get a happy ending.

In the end, the story fell flat. The story has no depth. It was shallow. An average story that uses r*pe and violence to mask off the shallowness of the story and the characters.

Reminds me of those stories where the author just needs to keep making the MC's life miserable, problem after problem in the hope of getting a reaction from the readers but when you think of the story without the abuse, it was just your average story. <<less
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LuvHeels
LuvHeels rated it
October 30, 2023
Status: Completed
Solche is really amazing to be able to create a character like Matthias. I can feel the hatred and fear towards him. At the same time my heart would also ache for him. He feels more realistic than the other yandere MLs. Well done!
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Yujian
Yujian rated it
September 21, 2022
Status: c138
First of all, thank you author - nim and translator -nim for this very intriguing Knovel. Aside from the novel itself, I love its main cover which has a very interesting photo and its title is very catchy to me.

Okay, this novel is very entertaining in its 3/4 parts and its very frustrating in the rest of its 1/4 parts, not ended though yet.

The two main characters have a very different background. They don't have any chance to collide with each others. Their worlds are just so paralleled not until... more>> the ML, the Duke, Matthias made it happened to make the parallel line to intersect with the world of Leyla, the free bird, the MC. Ahhh, so much angst, so much emotional abuses, so much emotional threats, but at the end of the road, the ML has given up his obsession towards the MC. He freed her based on what happened in Ch138 but who knows what shall happen in the next future chapters.

If you are not ready to be emotionally battered and can't handle the emotional abuses of an ML, then don't try to read this, because, in your screwed perspective, you will hate the ML till the ends of the earth because of his manipulation towards the MC. Since I love having an ML who is very yandere in emotional abuses but not physically, I am very interested to the ML.

PS: I just finished the ST and thanking again that this novel ended so beautifully, the way the readers wanted this to end. <<less
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whitespade
whitespade rated it
July 17, 2022
Status: c123
This is a great novel if you like a yandere ML. Please read the title and scram if you don't like it!

What I like about the novel is utterly miserable our MC is. I always love it when authors step on their MCs until they break. Layla is such a sweet cinnamon roll. Her despair is beautiful.

Our ML is the standard cold and heartless ML. Nothing revolutionary, but I don't want any in the first place. I love how cruel and dismissive our ML is to our MC, and how... more>> easy to spout abuse at him to support our MC. He just make you really eager to bring out the guillotine and kill of all the aristocrats you know?

Of course, these two are cliche characters but it's the way the writer and translator elaborate their inner world that make them so rich and memorable in our imagination. When they break the readers break with them.

I need to thank the translator again. The translation is very immersive. <<less
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Sailor113
Sailor113 rated it
November 12, 2021
Status: c26
The story is well written and easy to get into. It’s also very enjoyable, and I never get bored reading this. The translations are also really professional. Whoever did the translating did a really good job!

The female lead is really likeable, even though she isn’t fantastic. She isn’t annoying and she isn’t too dumb. If you don’t like characters that cry a lot you might not like her, but I think it’s realistic that she would cry in her situations.

The male lead doesn’t just have sadistic tendencies, he’s actually evil.... more>> He does everything he can to make the female lead cry, and just treats her like shit. The female lead deserves so much better than him, and I honestly can’t imagine how she’s going to fall in love with him, because so far the only way he have made her heart beat is because of fear.

Even if I gave it a high rating I can see why others gave it a low rating. This might not be for evryone. <<less
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Arechu_Nana30
Arechu_Nana30 rated it
September 15, 2023
Status: Completed
The story is well written and successfully drawn reader into it. I was amazed by the author how she cleverly flesh out her every character with the story using the words that can make the reader riding along the journey of the FL and ML towards the ending. Her writing skill undeniably perfect beautiful and there's some metaphor using in this story and I like that.

But... the emotional that I invested from the beginning until the end on this story unfortunately didn't pay out regardless of how I keep struggling... more>> to finish the story only just because the writing and my curiosity. The romance between FL and ML make me uncomfortable. Looking back at how despicable the ML actions making me want to put him on jail immediately. He's the BIG MAJOR RED FLAG AND MENACE TO SOCIETY THAT I CAN'T TOLERATE! Props to the author again for the good writing skill of his character who breaking the reader mind as to follow up the story and I also affect too but I won't easily let this scum brainwash my thought and rational mind about how he narrates and do the cruel/disgusting s**t things to the FL. I feel hopeless how the ending turn out to be. I want all the suffering of FL to be redeem by how the author make the ML suffer more or even better didn't end up together. (I'm not a bit fan of tragedy romance but for this one, I definitely wish). I know he already suffer when the FL runaway but for me this is not enough to cover all the suffering FL have to swallow up with her mental crisis with losing her loved uncle even he found her again when she pregnant and want to take her baby away he still with his damn toxic arrogant trait! I cry at this part about how she suffer mentally and in pain carrying that scum child and that it's too much for me to TOLERATE HIS DAMN BEHAVIOR ANYMORE! If the author really want to make them together, the most better for the ending at least make them take some time for each other especially FL to heal in emotionally and physically. By the time they reunite, I want to them be purely sharing their company without the need to rekindle their relationship quickly. They can simply just being in close proximity to one another with that way and slowly it can led them to be better version of themselves and learn the meaning of REAL LOVE. That's what I hope for the FL to have the REAL HAPPINESS in her lifetime at the ending of the story. That scum didn't deserve to be with her. My sense of rational keep tingling as to take her away from that abuser and teach her about how exactly the real love work.

Personally, I guess this story is not for me (even I enjoy the yandere story, but I have my own limit to where I can tolerate their behaviour and when it comes to the crime- s*xual assault and r***, that's it.) For the dark psychological obsession yandere fan can mostly enjoy this BUT REMEMBER NEVER ROMANTICIZE THIS KIND OF LOVE – MANIPULATE, CRUEL AND ABUSING. THAT IS NOT THE DEFINITION OF LOVE. LET IT STAY AS A FICTION. This story purpose all the way back to make the reader want the ending to be what they wanted to be but for me personally, I like the journey of the story but not the destination way of the author make the reader want out of the story and that's the times when I threw myself out of the road quickly. It difference even though I like the writing skill but the ending not the one that I hope to be. I'm more for the emotional growth and healing after being survived during dark times and also bonus if the author highlight about the self growth of the main character and the negative impact of their bad things does to other before finding the way to be together.

Ps: I wish this brilliant amazing author take the matter about toxic relationship seriously especially using the s*xual assault in every of her story and aware about the young naïve reader who don't know anything about this can easily influence by this kind of relationship as she likely make a story about this troupe on her every novel and it also got popular in Korea. I wish the author very well, no hard feeling. <<less
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Momotofu
Momotofu rated it
August 6, 2022
Status: c130
Thank you translator for all your hard work and quality translation. Tldr review: quality read; truly well written. The characters will break your heart and every chapter is a cobblestone laid down enticing you down into their world/hell. I want to know if I can climb out if it with Layla.

Long tirade review: The description in this story paints a beautifully haunting picture of the self-indulgent two-faced nature of aristocracy. Expect to have your heart torn and trampled alongside the MC. If you start reading this while it is still... more>> updating, you will most likely be like me; caught up and refreshing the webpage every waking moment and reading a new chapter at 2am in the morning. Why!? Because this mental train wreck is both terrible and yet strangely tantalizing. Damn you, Matthias, your devil-like charm transcends the virtual pages. I keep hoping that maybe some innate goodness in you will manifest... but you make me wish I had an isekai truck to teleport you and all the aristocratic filth somewhere awful.

This shakes me back into reality where the world is not always fair. Yet hope, flickers...

Take my hand guys— we need to pull Layla out of there!!!! I will let Kyle hitch a ride too. <<less
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