Turns Out I’m Crazy

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Lu Zhengfei killed Chen Qianqing.

He disabled Chen Qianqing’s legs, and blinded his eyes, locking him up with chains in his house. Then, he watched with his eyes wide as he died.

Injuries inflicted in the name of love would always end in tragedy.

Did Lu Zhengfei regret it? Of course, he did. And so, God gave him another chance.

But this time, he found that he himself—became Chen Qianqing.

Associated Names
One entry per line
我原来是个神经病
Related Series
N/A
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Recommendation Lists
  1. Switch!! Gong->Shou Shou->Gong
  2. BL Novels to explore
  3. Sad and tragedy novels
  4. want to read
  5. Pick your Poison [BL]

Latest Release

Date Group Release
07/29/22 Tabby Translations c48
06/01/22 Tabby Translations c47
05/27/22 Helli Translations c31
05/18/22 Tabby Translations c46
05/07/22 Tabby Translations c45
05/03/22 Tabby Translations c44
04/24/22 Tabby Translations c43
04/16/22 Tabby Translations c42
04/11/22 Tabby Translations c41
04/01/22 Tabby Translations c40
03/26/22 Tabby Translations c39
03/23/22 Tabby Translations c38
03/19/22 Tabby Translations c37
03/08/22 Tabby Translations c36
03/04/22 Tabby Translations c35
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38 Reviews sorted by


rimirinrin
rimirinrin rated it
August 31, 2022
Status: Completed
Nice reborn + narcissus trope. I got hooked the minute I jumped into this book.

Lu Zhengfei got reborn into Qianqing's body to go through what Qianqing went through with another him in the new timeline. There are some blind spots from Lu Zhengfei's past life that he will now discover now and regrets his actions then even more. As usual, Xi Zixu is very humorous, the internal dialogues were funny.

This is the one time I don't hate the scum gong in his reborn life. I really feel that pain for... more>> him, the internal struggle he has from the regrets in his previous life as Lu Zhengfei conflicting with Chen Qianqing's POV this time, but now he wants to set things right for Chen Qianqing. Chen Qianqing's last words were really true "Isn't my death the best revenge towards you?" Old Lu really hated the young Lu in this timeline due to his regrets from his previous life so I was thinking how can it end up in a HE. I feel that it was a journey of growing and realization for Lu Zhengfei. Towards the end, it was true to the title and trope: He is a crazy person whom only he himself could love. The extras are nice - mpreg, reverse roles and Chen Qianqing's backstory was nice too. <<less
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cutekittensmeow
cutekittensmeow rated it
July 8, 2022
Status: Completed
A novel about self love.

And dog blood. It reads a lot like a wife chasing novel but the wife is long gone.

I found the psychology of this novel to be really interesting. The way the MCML and ML interact is fascinating. They're the same person but one is a decade older and massively depressed because they had to deal with the consequences of their own actions.

The abuse only happens in flashbacks and isn't graphic. There's r*pe but it's not graphic. The ML is your typical yandere, controlling with a terrible... more>> temper. Watching him learn how dumb he is is quite satisfying. It's very dramatic. I strongly recommend.

I will say that the novel doesn't read like a romance because the MCML never really seems to be in love. He just seems like he's accepted his situation and wants to be vicariously happy through the ML. But I still enjoyed the ending, I think everyone got what they deserve. <<less
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FrostyDragon
FrostyDragon rated it
March 7, 2022
Status: Completed
It was okay. I felt the dark themes weren't that impactful due to the dry writing style, but I did end up enjoying the dynamic between the MC and ML, and even rooted for them towards the end. The ending and extras were quite good.

I did get tired of the MC constantly coming up with explanations for why it didn't work out with him and the original Chen Qianqing - such as the bullying CQQ suffered, the horrible family, the struggle to be the middle class lover of an upper... more>> class rich business man, while downplaying the obvious - that no matter whether CQQ liked men or not, the fact was that the MC (and ML) r*ped and abused him. As some of the other characters pointed out, if you love someone you don't break their legs and make them suffer. And the fact that people around Lu Zhengfei was more bothered with him being in love with a man than the fact that he was forcing CQQ into a 'relationship' was kind of weird.

I think the story could have been deeper than it was, since the themes were quite interesting, but maybe the author didn't want the story become too horrifying and the MC too unlikable. <<less
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Ameto
Ameto rated it
June 13, 2021
Status: c31
I love this story. It is funny and heart warming in pov of former ML eiei
2 Likes · Like Permalink | Report
IvaAres
IvaAres rated it
May 30, 2021
Status: Completed
This was weird. In the beginning I couldn't wrap my head around how the MC may fall in love with his younger self and kept trying to find hints that maybe the Chen dude is actually in the body of the younger MC and wants to torture the MC just like he tortured him in their previous life. But in the end I had to accept that this was "selfcest". Though in a way its understandable cuz the way the MC said "if I don't love myself then who will?"... more>> wasn't wrong.

Their are some mtls that kill all your brain cells. BUT the mtl for this novel was really good and I could understand almost everything. If it wasn't for thr fact that I already knew I was mtling the novel I would have actually thought it had been done by a real person who translated it. It is much better than other mtls. <<less
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etsuhun
etsuhun rated it
June 24, 2020
Status: Completed
This novel had all of the tags that I would normally steer away from, but the summary reeled me in. I mean who wouldn't? The first chapter hooked me in, and just a series of dogblood and face slap on the ML's side afterwards.

One of the best transmigration novels I've read, and I mostly read soft danmeis. Would reread this in the future. Highly recommended!
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eleen
eleen rated it
January 18, 2023
Status: Completed
I don't know, I've mixed feelings about this novel. It's definitely different from other novel, for sure. Also, please check the tags carefully before reading this novel.

MC does hateful things that leads to death of his lover and he understood how deep his obsessions were. After he reborn, he suffered even more. I hate the top MC but also feel sympathetic. This novel brought tears in my eyes.

For those who don't like this type of genre, then refrain yourselves from reading this.
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Kerry976
Kerry976 rated it
December 2, 2022
Status: c44
Scum. Pe*vert. Yander. (Not in a romanticised way)

That's ML for you... or MC. They are the same persons from different timelines. Honestly, no normal person can understand or handle ML's twisted love. He loves MC (uh.. not MC, but the original host) and maybe does anything for him and at the same time, he r*pes and abuses him... Seriously, it's scary.

The psychological aspect is so beautifully expressed I wish I could read it till the end.

It's a unique aspect.
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Mokey
Mokey
February 5, 2021
Status: Completed
Im not sure if I like the the novel or not and my English is not so good but I tried to give the review due to the pain in my heart... first chapter with the real Chen Qianqing was so tense, cruel and I hate Lu Zhengfei. How come you break your love one leg just to make sure he is with you, some more he blinded him and the caused of him died. Oh my.. its so sad and make me want to kill Lu Zhengfei. However the... more>> sweet revenge that Chen Qianqing have is so sweet and I like it. After the reborn, the Lu Zhengfei that now is Chen Qianqing and he is also suffered, I like the second chapter because he can feel how tortured the real Chen Qianqing is, the tortured feeling is not due to abusive of the current Lu Zhengfei, but because he know how bad he was in his past life, he believed of his cousin accusation and dont even try to understand the suffering that the original Chen Qianqing have. He also suffered due to the current Lu Zhengfei received his love and tolerence, while the original him not.

If.. If he just open his heart and treat the real Chen Qianqing nicer than both of them will not be suffering. I like the end of the novel as both of them are happy <<less
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battered melon
battered melon rated it
January 15, 2021
Status: --
Amazing, novel. I totally recommend reading it. The plot is interesting? It lives up to the psychological tag. Very good plot. Might be a little rude but MC is kinda mental, but still a good MC. Good characters, good plot. This is one of my favorite novels, I find it hard to dislike the characters, so pretty much good everything. There's a lot of r*pe and abuse but that's all up there in the tags.

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baruna
baruna rated it
October 3, 2020
Status: Completed
This was also addicting lol, I finished the entire novel in a few days. Not at all a difficult read in Chinese if you're fluent.

One should definitely reading the warnings/tags before casting judgment and reviewing since there is a lot of morally dubious behavior going on in this novel. It's not for the fainthearted lol. But what made me give this story five stars is precisely because of the unusual-ness of the novel.

MC kills his one-true-love & ends up in the past.... but he's in his one-true-love's body. He... more>> now has to face off with HIMSELF as the primary antagonist. There is a lot of psychological introspection, manipulative maneuvering, and just general internal reflection on life and karma. I enjoyed this aspect - how often do you get to read a novel where it's MC vs. MC... and then the main pairing ends up as MC/MC?? And the focus is not on romance but on the psychology of it all?? Anyway, I liked this, though the general feeling while reading this won't necessarily fill you with satisfaction, it'll give you something to think on. <<less
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nene-77
nene-77 rated it
February 25, 2024
Status: c70
I couldn't accept the fact that they were the same person ML and MC it's kinda of weird but I understand that they each have different personality it's just weird doing all that with yourself

Spoiler

The way of the story is different from the first life for ML

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Scar21
Scar21 rated it
December 5, 2023
Status: --
The story is very well written, and this novel should definitely add a tragedy tag. If you're into stories that have no comedic moments and every part of the story is heavy enough to crush you at times...... then this is the right story for you.

The rest is just me spilling my thoughts on the characters......

... more>>
Spoiler

I love how, the moral of the story is that the as*hole could only love himself. From start to finish, there was never a single moment where I liked the Gong.

Until I read the last chapter, words cannot express how much I pitied the real shou. Good thing he got the happy ending......

What's funny is that, at the very end, when he goes a few days back in time....... the gong in this timeline is still a control freak with his twisted love..... the shou just decided to accepthim like that and they got a happy ending.

If you look at it another way, the gong (the one from the second timeline) is gonna continue treating shou like that...... because the only way he could possibly understand Shou's suffering, is by experiencing it himself

This sh*t is twisted and I'm here for it. ALTHOUGH, I need a sequel where they show how the real shou got his happy ending. 🥲

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WhenDogsFly
WhenDogsFly rated it
May 22, 2023
Status: Completed
Oof okay. That was a rollercoaster of emotions. The ending is HE, just to remind everyone. Maintain your hopes up and you will be able to go through the angst parts. I personally liked it. Although many people might find the selfcest thing weird, the author didn't leave out any discrepancies and perfectly described Chen Qianqing (Lu Zhengfei) as he came to terms with this complicated relationship. TW for abuse if you didn't get that from the synopsis or tags
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OuRyed
OuRyed rated it
January 20, 2022
Status: Completed
This novel is very interesting

The Description is very intriguing, and the Content didn't disappoint.

Watching the MC suffering from his crime and atoning for what he had done to finally obtaining forgiveness. Then a HE, this novel is worth reading (◍•ᴗ•◍)
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Mafios01
Mafios01 rated it
July 8, 2020
Status: c1
This novel is strange in a good way. But I do not recommend it if you feel sensitive to issues such as s*xual abuse, physical abuse, psychological problems, among other dubious issues.

I know it is difficult to say that a novel with those themes can be... Good? (somehow)

I still don't know how I feel, which makes me recognize this novel more.

... more>> A curious fact is that despite everything, this novel doesn't spill dog blood in exaggeration. I think it is quite realistic in the story.

There are some things that I would have liked to see develop but it doesn't feel bad.

If you have doubts, I recommend you give it a try. In mtl it's easy to read the rest of the chapters not yet translated. <<less
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